A Bored Man's Blog

American Idol S09 - Top 11

2010-03-24T10:43:00.003+02:00

The top 11 are here to perform "Billboard's #1's". Which means just about every song they want, as there have been thousands of #1's, in all the various categories, and with AI's famous wriggling of the "rules", the contestants can just pick a song, and they'll get to sing it. Basically.

A video about all kind of music stuff, and Billboard stuff, and Miley Cyrus is the "mentor" for the week.

Lee's first, and he's going to sing "The Letter" by the Box Tops. And he doesn't change it one bit. His phrasing was just plain weird at places. And he looks REALLY uncomfortable without a guitar. He kept moving his left hand around, to show he's not just standing there, I guess, but that was just odd. Overall, ignoring the visual aspect of it, it was a good performance. Not great, but not bad either. Somewhere in the middle. Oh, and Ellen's still trying to hard to make people laugh. And Kara's hallucinating. How exactly did he look comfortable?

Paige's next. She's going to give us yet ANOTHER FREAKING VERSION OF "Against All Odds". Go to hell. She makes breathy noises throughout. And if pitchy was an actual word, it wouldn't have been enough to describe this performance. Terrible. Just terrible. Seriously, awful. And she looked so happy when it ended... My GOD she sucked. And the worst comment yet? "I know you're PROBABLY better than this".

Tim's doing Queen's "Crazy Little Thing Called Love". When did they tell him he's boring? I'm too tired to remember anything right now... He's going to "move around the stage", and he starts by standing with a mic stand. Ha. Then he walks to one side. And back to the middle. And then he SLIDES!!! to the other side! Cool! But no. It was just not good enough vocally. Style of substance, cheesy, wedding band-y, whatever. It's not that I didn't enjoy it. It was fun. But as Simon loves saying, it has no meaning in the real world, and there's no way it would be a hit right now. Kara's bringing him down for being cool. Shut up. Simon's comments were funny AND spot on!

Aaron's going to give us yet ANOTHER version of "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing". And again, the phrasing is throwing me off for a spin. Just weird. He didn't do anything to the song, didn't change it ANYWHERE, not one little bit. His singing was good, not great, and no where close to Steven Tyler. It was just OK. A little less, because of the "rocker" look. And that weak-ass smile at the end. And Simon suggested he give Miley a kiss (I think, couldn't hear), and Ryan called him, jokingly, David Archuleta. *FACEPALM*

Crystal's doing "Me and Bobby McGee" by Janis Joplin. And it's exactly how you thought it was going to be. Good, but predictable. Other than the fast part, which was a nice change, it was yet another one in a line of Bowersox-performed songs. Completely interchangeable with pretty much everything we've ever heard from her. And that's not going to be enough to win this thing. She was getting predictable, fast, and that last part wasn't enough to change that feeling. Good. Best yet. But she's been better, and I didn't love it. Whatever. And in case you haven't figured it out, she's a Chosen One. She's standing on a carpet! WTF? And then she and Ryan sit down.

Mike's singing Percy Sledge's "When a Man Loves a Woman". Miley loves him. And it's the third performance of his that's basically exactly the same, only with varying levels of good singing. This is good. Not great. A little boring. Quite predictable. I like this dude. I do NOT like this song, or the rut he's sliding into. Whatever II: Electric Boogaloo.

Andrew says "He Heard it Through the Grapevine". AGAIN. ANOTHER version of this song. His accent is really weird on all the non-Straight-Up-like songs. And his voice isn't big enough, I think, not by Idol standards. But it was a nice performance. A not-so-great performance. Not a terrible one. Even with the hand gestures and all. And if it means I won't have to hear another weird accented song from him, I'm OK with him going. I don't think he will, but there's that. When Simon gave him his criticism, he looked ready to pull his piece out and put a cap in his ass!

Katie's next, and I'm about to fall asleep. She's singing Fergie's "Big Girls Don't Cry". And for the first time EVAH! We see the Katie one Kara proclaimed "could possibly be someone that can win this". It can still be better. Better song choice, better singing, better performing, but it was pretty good! I liked it! Way to go! Kara's a "Musical Psychic" - Pop with R&B leanings. "Mad pitch issues". Go to hell.

Next is Casey. He's singing the "Rocker Anthem" "The Power of Love" by Huey Lewis and the News. His voice is just not that pleasant, to me at least. That hoarseness/odd vibrato is so distracting. And I don't think Miley meant he should STARE at people. It was a'ight. He's another one of the predictable bunch. Every wee, it's him and the guitar. I LOVE the guitar. I don't love the voice. And BOY did Ellen and Kara speak out of their asses. WHAT are they listening to? Kara said "if you had 10 hit songs, you could make an album". ANYONE who can get 10 hit songs can make an album, you moron!

DiDi's up, and some say her name's written Didi! She's doing "You're No Good" by Linda Ronstadt. And Ryan EFFED UP her last named. HA! It was a good performance. A very good one, but the way she looked at people was scary, at times. I'm bored, though. Nothing else to say about the performance.

Siobhan looks SO WEIRD when she meets Miley. She's singing Stevie's "Superstition". What happened to her hair?!?!? The good thing's her vocals don't suffer from the hair, she's rocking it. Bets tonight, even with a scream or two at the end, and weird faces throughout. And it's not even close.

1. Siobhan

2. Crystal

3. DiDi (Didi?)

4. Casey

5. Lee

6. Katie

7. Mike

8. Aaron

9. Andrew

10. Tim

11. Paige

American Idol S09 - Top 12 Results

2010-03-18T21:22:00.002+02:00

One's going home tonight. Who? we'll find out soon enough...

A weird retrospective is up first, then some banter and a re-introduction of the "Judges' Save". Whatever... DC is back, singing the AWESOME!!!! Jumping Jack Flash. One word? AWESOME!!! Definitely won't be voted out. Oh, right, he's not competing anymore. Never mind, then. The lead guitarist dude was amazing. Freaking amazing.

The return of the Ford music video's alright. Not great. Not exciting. A great song, but nothing much other than that. Another Ford commercial's next. really boring. And they're all super lame. Well, maybe not all. But definitely most.

Paige's up. And down to the bottom 3. Lee's up. And safe. Siobhan's next. And safe. Aaron's up. Safe too. Andrew and Tim stand up. Tim's bottom 3. Andrew's safe.

Now a performance by someone I don't know. Orianthi, apparently. Singing "According to You", apparently. She rocks the guitar, apparently. And she was going to be MJ's guitarist in his tour. Apparently.

DiDi's up. And safe. Crystal's up. And safe. Katie's up. And she too, is safe. Big Mike's up. Big Mike's safe. Big Mike's big, BTW. Casey and Lacey (ha) are up. Casey's safe. Lacey's bottom 3.

Now to the bottom 3. Tim's safe, and we have ourselves a bottom 2 (maybe, Ryan didn't say that...).

Ke$ha feat. 3OH!3 sings Blah Blah Blah. And that's my queue to go get something to drink. Not my cup of tea. She's trying to be weirder than Lady GaGa, but in a different style. Whatever. That sucked.

Lacey and Paige are up. And Paige's safe. Lacey's going to Sing For Her Life! (TM). She's SOOO not going to be saved. And she's not, and she's outta here. THANK YOU, America, for saving me the trouble of hearing her again. Seeya!

American Idol S09 - Top 12! The Rolling Stones!

2010-03-17T19:18:00.004+02:00

OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! It's the top 12! And they're going to perform songs by the Rolling Stones! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG!

OK, glad I got that out of my system, phew!

First we get some blabbering from Ryan, about superstars, and stages, and judges. We see the top 12, just in case America forgot who they stupidly chose to put through. Next a Rolling Stones video! WOOHOO!!!! I LOVE THE STONES!!!!!! These next two hours are probably gooing to be filled with butcherings of my fave songs. Aw shucks!

Big Mike's first, and we get to see his sob-story. And when I say sob-story, I mean no disrespect, it's just a vote-getting tool, and I do mean to disrespect that. So there. He's singing Miss You (Fun Fact #1: The longest version of this song is 8 and a half minutes long!). Great song choice for him. And he does a great job with it. Well, maybe not great, but he didn't destroy it, and I like that, and he sang well, and I liked it. So yeah, great job. the judges judge, and Ryan gets some much needed face time with Simon.

DiDi's next. And her sob-story. She's singing Play With Fire (FF#2: This B-Side reached #96 on the Hot 100). Despite angry faces, she does a really great job. The arrangement was different enough to be original, without destroying the song. And even though she had some iffy spots, both vocally, and singing-the-words-ly, she did a great job. A really great job. Not a good job, but it was great, like Mike. Just great job. I think she said Siobhan's getting off on rubbing against her. I THINK. Not sure.

Casey's sob-story's next. Oh, yeah, he's also going to sing It's All Over Now (FF#3: This hit the top of the charts in the UK between the Animals' House of the Rising Sun, and the Beatles' A Hard Day's Night). Or, to be precise, he's going to play the slide-guitar, AWESOMELY, while singing mediocrely at the same time. He's got a twang in his voice, sort of like a vibrato, but that sucks. It was very nice, but not so much because of the singing, in my books. Still very nice.

If I were to be a contestant, you can talk about how I fell from the see-saw when i was young. It really hurt. The kid that played doctor in my kindergarten thought I might die. I turned out fine a minute later. It was the longest minute of my life. :'(.

Lacey's going to make you cry next, with her well-thought-out sob-story. Right... She's singing Ruby Tuesday. Oh, no. She's ruining it! AW HECK! I love this song. LOVE IT, LOVE IT, LOVE IT. And she's killing it! My ears are bleeding! Someone, PLEASE, stop her! The arrangement, was terrible, especially the quick "Still I'm gonna miss you", but her singing was even worse! STOP IT! PLEASE! (FF#4: At LEAST 9 artist have successfully covered at least some of this song, without destroying it completely. That list remaind unchanged after this performance).

Andrew's well-known sob-story gets some more TV time. He's going to rock (fingers crossed) Gimme Shelter (FF#5: Scorsese (you know who I mean) has made this song into a theme of his gangster movies, appearing in Goodfellas, Casino and The Departed). His voice doesn't really fit the "just a shout away" parts, but it's spot on for the rest of it. So overall, a solid song choice. And a more than solid performance. His best of the competition, and the reason for that, I think, is that he didn't try and out do his Straight Up. He just did the song.

Katie's next, and we're not going to hear a sob-story for her. Just kidding! Gotcha! She's singing the awesome Wild Horses (FF#6: This was Susan Boyle's debut single, and it's been covered by about a million different artists). I LOVE THAT SONG! The BackLight of Inspiration (C) is fully on, as she begins the song weirdly, to say the least. But, as she gets in groove in the chorus, the light's off, and we can concentrate on the well sung song. Not greatly sung, but well sung. I knew I wouldn't be crazy about the singing this week, but this is getting a bit much, don't you think?

Tim's up. But not before a little sob-story! He's doing the mysogonistic (is that right?) Under My Thumb (Not So FF#7: It was during a performance of this song that Meredith Hunter was killed, in that Stones concert in Altamont), in a weird reggae influenced arrangement. Which sucks. Or maybe not. I don't know. I'm kind of on the fence on whether or not I liked it. I don't think I did. But maybe I did. I don't know. The vocals were there, but, I don't know.

Siobhan gets a sob-story. She sings Paint It Black (FF#8: Not an original Stones' song, it was covered by more than 100 different artist). The beginning is way off base. Just plain weird. But as she gets into the fast-er parts, she gets back to earth, and does a very good version, of an awesome song. Not much else I've got to say about it. The judges exaggerate. But htey tend to do that.

Lee's next, and he can't tell his colors. And he's shy. Sob. He's rocking on an original twist on Beast of Burden (FF#9: Bette Middler covered it! Right... I got nothing). AWESOME! YEAH! I love the arrangement, and he performs it well. I really do love this version! Not as good as the original, OBVIOUSLY, but as close as anyone's been so far in this performance episode. Awesome!

Paige too has a sob-story. Believe it... or not! She covers (yeah, covers) Honky Tonk Women (FF#10: Was inspired by Brazilian Gauchos. I know, I'm grasping...). NOTHING original about the version, other than the gender reversal thing, which was nice, but to be expected. Her voice wasn't any good on it. The song rocks. This version rocks. She doesn't. She's sick, BTW, and they say that explains some stuff. Whatevs...

Aaron's got a sob story! Shocker! He's singing Angie (FF#11: The german cover of this single is AWESOME!), with spikey hair. He's actually does a good, not in any way original, job on this classic. He doesn't do the whispers, so that sucks. But everything else was good.

Crystal's in the pimp-spot. She, too, unbelieveably, has a sob-story. She's doing You Can't Always Get What You Want (FF#12: It was mentioned in House (the TV show... duh...) 7 times!). I EFFING LOVE THIS SONG!!!! My ABSOLUTELY fave Stones song, EVAH!!! The arrangement threw me off at the beginning, but got back on track after the first "You can't always get what you want". Overall? AWESOME! I don't always get her, and I'm not yet on the Bowersox wagon, but this was great. And she has had a string of great performances. Great!

Final rankings for the night:

1) Lee

2) DiDi

3) Crystal

4) Andrew

5) Siobhan

6) Aaron

7) Katie

8) Mike

9) Casey

10) Paige

11) Tim

12) Lacey

Either Lacey or Tim have GOT to get gots! and get outta here. PLEASE... PLEASE let it be Lacey.

American Idol S09 - Top 12 Revealed!

2010-03-13T03:11:00.002+02:00

Let's find out who's going to be in the top 12, and of who we'll finally get rid of.

But before we get down and dirty, a group song that sucks, and the theme of the first week of the finals is announced - The Rolling Stones! First off, AWESOME! I LOVE the Stones. Second of all - I'm going to hate all these kids after they massacre some of the best songs ever... SIGH...

And now, the reason we came here - Let's find out who's in the top 12, and who'll be serving you fries next Friday.

DiDi's first, and through. Hey, I called that! Siobhan's next, and is through too. Hey, I called that too! Paige and Katelyn are called to centerstage, and Katelyn's through! Which, by the way, I called, and Paige's outta here! Which, in case you were wondering, I also called. Oh. Wait. It's the other way around. I did NOT call that... Way to go America! Keep a sucky one over a better one...

Tim, Todrick, Lee and Casey are called to join Ryan in the middle of the stage. Casey's through (called it), Tim's through (called it), Lee's through (called it) and Todrick's outta here (called it).

Crystal's through (yeah, I did call it), Big Mike's through (I think I called this, didn't I?), Lacey's through (HUH???? WHY????), which means either Lilly or Katie are outta here... But before that, Aaron's through (SERIOUSLY???), and that means either Andrew or Alex are gone. Andrew's through, and Alex's out... Awwww.... :(

Katie and Lilly are up next, Katie's through (which I called) and Lilly's outta here (which I didn't see coming). So that's it. Seeya next time!

American Idol S09 - Top 8 Guys

2010-03-12T01:12:00.002+02:00

8 guys, 6 move through, sexual innuendos will be plenty. Will we be interested? Let's hope so...

THIS! is AAAAMMMerican Idol!

Lee's singing some song I don't know. Everything's fine and all, except for the smiley faces, and some feelling I have. It's like singer-in-a-coffee-shop thing. It was a good singer-in-a-coffee-shop, definitely. But not a singing-competition-"look-how-good-I-am" performance. But he'll go through, no doubt about it.

Alex gives us yet another version of LaMontagne's Trouble on Idol. And it's not the best version. It's an OK version. It's not bad, not really good. Just OK. And I found myself uninterested. It was there. And it made that minute and a half more pleasant. But nothing more than that. Should be safe, would be safe? We'll see. The judges called him a stiff, cocky banana. HUH??? And a promise to see Randy in a bikini next week, should Alex still be here. Yay? Nay?

Tim's going to butcher Leonard Cohen's Hallelujah by attempting Jeff Buckley's version. You want to know what it was? it was a vanilla-fied, "let's make this a fun pop song", PPPPP filled performance of one of the best performances of one of the best songs ever. Technically sufficient, maybe, but with that song, it's so much beyond all of that bull-crap. I don't know what the judges are talking about. Sure, he sang Hallalujah. That's not enough to win this thing, and shouldn't be enough for them to declare him "in this". It was his best performance yet, but it should have been so much better.

What's with EVERYONE playing the guitar tonight? Andrew's doing an original twist on Xtina's Genie in a Bottle. And it works. Is it just me, or are everyone going for the same spot on the top 12? Everyone tonight are sounding interchangeable. It's not a good thing. They all just jumble up, and, come decision time, some will be left out, just because they sound similar to someone else in the competition. This, for me, for him, for me, for my grandma, for the sound tech, for me, worked. It was a very nice rendition.

Hey look! Casey's got a surprise for us! He's going to play the guitar! And it's another, white, OK, not too shabby, not too great, performance, exactly the same as all the ones that went before him. I hate this shit. The guys have to stop trying to copy each other. Be original. Be yourselves. Don't be vanilla.

And, the first guy out not in the top 12, Aaron, makes his first mistake by not playing the guitar. But seriously, how is he still there? He just bugs me... Go do your homework, kiddo. His hipthrusts are chicken-little-funny. And the "look how bad I am" smile at the end was awful. I really couldn't care less about this performance. Get him off my TV. NOW!

Next! Todrick's going to destroy a Queen song! Can't wait! And the second guy not to get into the top 12 - Todrick! The arrangement was beyond terrible, the beginning just plain bad, the ending even worse, and everything in the middle was a mish-mash of not great and mediocre. Give me a break. Get HIM off my TV.

Mike starts REALLY high. And if that wasn't good enough, he goes out and BLASTS it! Best performance, not tonight, not of his, not of a guy, but BEST PERFORMANCE THIS SEASON. DUDE! WOW! I mean, I knew he's good, but seriously? Are you kidding me? WOW! Kara's over-reacting, but WOW!

So, yeah, Aaron and Todrick should get outta here. Hopefully. Seeya!

American Idol S09 - Top 8 Girls

2010-03-11T20:33:00.002+02:00

Shouldn't they move this show to a later timeslot? What's with all the groping and sex talk they've gotten into this?

Anyway, a certain "talented 16 years old" starts us off with a bad song choice, and a mediocre performance. It started out not so good, improved towards the end, but never really got anyway. She was 8(!!!) When Kelly won the show!!! WOW... Anyway, she sucked enough for people to want to try and save her, but didn't suck so bad that no one will vote for her. And she got some encouragement from Simon. She should be safe. I hope she'll be safe. I think she could do a whole lot better.

Siobhan will sing "House of the Rising Sun"! I love this song!! She better not screw it up... I didn't care for the arrangement, AT ALL. But... She didn't scrw it up, so... WOOHOO!! AWESOME!!! No idea what the judges talk about. I can say she didn't miss a note (a bold claim from a tone-deaf-ish guy like myself), and it was an overall very good performance. It was quite dark, but still. By the way, I didn't comment on her previous performance, which was great. One other thing is I hate it when people sing songs in a different accent than the original. It just sounds weird as heck. So when she sang "She sowed" and I got it, it was very odd. Like Michelle (I think), singing "With Arms Wide Open" last time around, actually saying "Open" and not "Opan".

Lacey's next, and I hate her vibratto-filled voice. I just want to close the TV. Can you please throw her out? Pretty please? It's not even interesting... You can sing badly, but still have people want you to stick around. That's not the case with her. Everything about her sucks. And that high note - my ears were about to start bleeding... Get her outta here. Please. What are the judges talking about??? And Kara - "In and out of your register"? I don't think so... Just sit, shut up, and look slightly pretty, will you?

Katelyn's song choice is terrible. I was actually a fan of both her previous performances, but this was a wedding-band performance. It wasn't bad, technically, but there wasn't anything great about it. Just some background music. Too bad, because we've seen that she can do better. She should be safe. And Ellen, while she has some funny moments, is trying to hard to make people laugh. But she really does have funny moments!

DiDi, our resident Jew, chooses a great Fleetwood Mac song, Rhiannon, and does a very good job with it. Me likey! Until the chorus, that is. That wasn't great. But everything else was very, very good. I was interested. I wanted to hear more. I want to hear more of her. Not only because she's Jewish, if that's what you're thinking. I like her, and I think we'll hear more of her. Or, at least hope so.

Paige chooses the great Smile by Mr. Chaplin. But I wasn't I had a straight face on. A bit of a frown. If "pitchy" was an actual word, it wouldn't have been enough to describe this performance. It blew. I hate her. Just about the same amount that she hates our ears.

I didn't get Crystal. Not really during the audition episodes, or Hollywood week, or the first two performances. But the beginning of this one was AWESOME. She can actually play the guitar! Like REALLY play! The beginning was the best part of it, and it got a bit more mediocre as it went on, but it was still great. The judges all love her. Except for Simon, who actually has to spend money on the winner, and wants her to mainstream-ize her self a bit more.

Lilly's next. I really dislike her voice. And the faces she makes freak me out. It probably was pretty good. I don't know. All I do know is, while trying to ignore her, I did notice that was one small guitar-looking instrument! Judging from people's, and judges', reaction, she was very good. I don't know. I don't care.

Going home, in what should be a forgone conclusion, are Paige and Lacey. I REALLY hope they both leave. Everyone else were a lot better. Everyone else should get into the top 12. One can only hope.

A Comment, A Confession, and CSI Miami

2010-03-11T18:57:00.002+02:00

1) I got a comment! And not a childish stupid "you suck one"! So, dear commenter, thank you for reading! About your comment - "You suck!". Just kidding. You might have been right. Siobhan might have been better than i thought. But truth is, I don't really care this season... Which leads me to...

2) I have a conffesion to make about this current season of AI. I don't get the hype. I usually don't. The contastants are on average not great. And to say the girls are better than the boys - I don't see it. There were 2 interesting guys, Big Mike and Fattish Latino Gokey, aka Andrew, when the top 24 started. They were the only ones, in the whole top 24 I wanted to see how they would do. And now Casey and Lee have generated some interest in my part. But not a whole lot of. Oh, and Lambert seems like a nice guy. Girls wise - 1 Jewish, 1 sort of interesting with a lot of hype around her, and one talented 16 years old. I could care less about the rest of 'em, but it'll be hard for me. So for those reasons I wasn't really paying much attention to the performances. BUT! Now that I know that someone read it, I'll work harder! And suck less!

3) CSI: Miami. My, oh my, how giants have fallen. It used to be good - it IS a CSI show. It used to be interesting. then, after the 2nd episode or so of the first season, I realised it doesn't. It's basically about H's Miami Mafia, with the highlight of every ep being that stupid sentence he says at the start, immidiately after which the intro starts. Like this week's "Murder's hard." H: "Harder........ than people think". YEAH!!!!!!!!!!! We won't get fooled again! Won't get fooled again! No no! The rest of the episode focuses on jumping to the most extreme conclusions they can based on what little evidence they have, and worse yet accusing people of murder, left and right. Either that, or "cool" bits where "groovy" music is playing, and the CSIs are doing some "cool" technical work, in split screen! And the plots SUCK, this week's ep's in particular. And the sideplots, you ask? From Speedle dying, to Eric almost dying, to Eric's dad's Russian mafia connections, to flying to Brazil to hunt down whoever killed H's wife, which is Eric's sis, to Eric and Calaeigh's relationship, to H calling everyone younger than him "son", being a pedophile, and having EVERY kid trust him, or to him being the secret desire of every girl on the planet. COME ON! This show sucks. BIG TIME.

Some smaller things, but no less important -

House this week - rocked. I laughed so much...

I met someone. Someone great. Maybe one day I'll tell you about her. Unlikely, but maybe...

I have a lot of tests coming up, and that blows...

That's it...

American Idol S09E13 - Top 12 Girls

2010-02-25T15:00:00.004+02:00

Hey.

It's been a while, huh? A lot has happened since I last posted here. I decided to drop out of college. Twice. But I'm gonna stay. Weird. I went skiing! For the first time in my life! And I had a blast there. I also met a girl there. And she's awesome. And we're sort of together. It's a long distance relationship, to say the least, with a distance of about 1200 miles between us, but we're trying to make this work. God, please let this work.

And that's enough of my personal bullshit. You want to know what hasn't changed? You. Still, no one reading. Other than that one bored person, even more bored than me, that left a childish comment. Way to go, dude.

And now, to the subject at hand... American Idol! The auditions are still boring, but now "New! With 4 Sob-Stories Every 5 Minutes!". Give me a break, will ya? Hollywood week was unimpressive, and so was the first performance episode of the top 24. The girls went first, and here's what I have to say about that -

But before that! Wait one more second! I have some things to say about the damn judges. Paula left (who cares?), Ellen joined (why the...???), Kara's incomprehensible ("you were there, and we were here, and we heard you"), and Simon's quitting soon. AI's becoming more and more DEAD. And also, isn't this show watched by young kids? The whole "hand on thigh" and BITCH! things were waaaaaay out of place. Seriously.

1) Paige - "All Right Now" by Free. David Cook did this song. He did it better. She wasn't good. Something weird about her voice, either just on this song, or in general. But it wasn't good. I just wanted it to end. And, yeah, bad song choice for her. Not that the song ain't good, but it isn't for her.

2) Ashley - "Happy" by Leona Lewis. BREATHY! STOP IT! The song might be called "Happy", but the parts she sang weren't, so don't smile! and take the mic out of your mouth, and put it about 15 feet away from you, that might sound better. And maybe we won't hear her sing, too. That would be great. Even worse than Paige...

3) Janell - "What About Love" by Heart. I thought it was a different song. Huh. Another bad song choice, and we're 3-for-3! Woohoo! It was definitely better than the two before, but it was still average, at best. And that sucks in Idol-land. And the ending was just plain odd. I dunno, something about it...

4) Lilly - "Fixing a Hole" by the Beatles. Just one episode into the performance part of the season, and we get a Beatles song! Awesome! Not her, singing it, but you know. I'm a huge Beatles fan. I can pretty much sing along to ALL of their songs. And, while it may be hard, there IS a way to change one of their songs, to be original with it, and still sound good. This ain't that way. It was still similar to the GOOD version, but not too much as to sound like a copycat. BUT... the things she did change were just weird. And she didn't sing it all that well. I didn't like it, but still, a LOT better than the ones before her. Oh, and she EFFED the lyrics. "And it really doesn't matter if I'm wrong, I'm right, where I belong, I'm right, where I belong". Not three times "I'm Right"...

5) Katelyn - "Oh! Darling" by the Beatles. TWO BEATLES SONGS! WOOHOO!!!! You seem THIS is what I mean! It was different, just because it was a female version of a Beatles song (DID YOU KNOW, that in all of their catalog, just ONE LINE of a Beatles song is performed by a girl? Yoko Ono on "The Continuing Story of Bungalow Bill"). It was a pretty close replica of the original, which, quite frankly, is OK with these classics, but it was different enough, because she IS a girl, and she did change some parts. MUCH better. Best so far? You bet.

6) Haeley - "I Wanna Hold Your Hand" by the Beatles. OH YEAH! THREE Beatles songs! That being said, she sucked. It was just terrible. And her upper lip freaks me out. Oh, and she massacred this classic. Which was a TERRIBLE song choice for this competition. I HATE her after that one. Still not the worst, I mean, it WAS a Beatles song.

Interlude - so far, this night SUCKS!

7) Lacey - "Landslide" by Fleetwood Mac. I don't know why, but I hate her. I just do. And can someone explain to me how was she allowed to audition, after getting so far last season? They used to not allow top 50's or so to come back in future season. They shouldn't have let her come back. She's awful. TERRIBLE song choice. And even worse singing. Fuck this shit...

8) Michelle - "Fallin'" by Alicia Keys. ANOTHER girl singing this song. Has there been a season where we didn't hear this? AFFFFF... The beginning was odd. The rest was better. Much better, but better. And there were worse singers tonight, so she'll be OK. Actually, one of the best tonight. Not that that's saying much, but still.

9) Didi - "The Way I Am" by Ingrid Michaelson. She's Jewish, right? I mean, Benami is a Jewish last name, so... is she? Anyway, I quite liked the song choice, and other than the "You-ou-ou-ou" parts, it was rather good. It was pretty dreary, though. But still, pretty good.

10) Siobhan - "Wicked Game" by Chris Isaak. How can that spelling read Shavon? or something like that? She's bugging me. Something about her that I don't like. She gives me the creeps sometime. The song started too low, continued averagely, and overall was a little short of alright. Nothing special.

11) Crystal - "Hand in My Pocket" by Alanis Morissette. Every single song she sings sounds the same. She's better than most other girls, so that's not necessarily a bad thing, but no way in hell she'll win doing that all the time. It was pretty good, but not a lot better than the average tonight, and that's not great.

12) Katie - "Feeling Good" by Nina Simone (and NOT Michael Buble). An OK ending to an OK night. She's a good singer, and better than what she's shown here, and she's better than most of the other girls here. Even though SHE'S 16! Wait, no, SHE'S 17! Pretty good. Not great. Not of the usual quality of show-enders, but still quite good.

1. Katelyn

2. Michelle

3. Lilly

4. Crystal

5. Katie

6. Didi

7. Janell

8. Siobhan

9. Haeley

10. Paige

11. Lacey

12. Ashley

Glee!

2009-12-11T05:38:00.001+02:00

WOW, it's been a long time since I've been here...

Here's a recap of what you missed -

I have a new apartment! YEAH! And two roommates, sorta. One of them's kinda weird. The other's okay. There's only 2 channels that work on the TV, neither of which is interesting. I use a netstick thingy to get online. That means I'm paying my cellphone company to surf the web. Kinda sucks.

Sports! Real's doing pretty well, and so are Maccabi Haifa. The Cavs and Heat could be doing better, and Omri Casspi's fantastic. If you don't know who that is, he's the rookie SF for the Kings. He's Israeli. And so far, he's been A LOT better than what people expected, having being picked 23rd in the last Draft. Last rookie ranking on NBA.com, he was 6th. 6th!

Athletics. I have a class, a sports/athletics class, on Sunday morning, starting at 7:30 AM. That means I need to take a train to Haifa on Saturday night. That sucks. But the class is kinda fun. We mainly run, and do all sorts of drills that have to do with running, for about 30-40 minutes, and then play, either football (soccer) or basketball. Kinda fun.

Mafia Wars. It's here, and it's here to stay. I love it. Yeah, I know, but still. I've been playing it on Facebook for three weeks or so, and I can't get enough of it. I tried some other games in the mean time, and a bit before I started MW, like FarmVille, World Cafe and such, but none of those stuck. MW is just fun.

NBA 2K10 is awesome. My Player mode in NBA 2K10 is awesome-er. Finally, a long, LONG time after every other sports series, 2K sports realized it will be a good idea to put a "create your own player and play as him for his whole career" mode in their NBA game. It still has some problems, but all in all, it's great. Lots of fun.

I kinda feel like playing D&D again. I miss is. It was loads of fun, but I just don't have the time right now. Too busy sleeping and not doing anything.

I started reading the Dexter series of books. It's every bit as good as the series, which is fantastic, and even though the main stories are very similar, it doesn't take anything away from the books, having already watched the corresponding episodes.

I'm hooked on yet another series. That makes it 25 active shows that I watch on a weekly basis, plus another one I need to catch up on. Which series do I watch? CSI(x3), Survivor, Dexter, Heroes, House, How I Met Your Mother, The Big Bang Theory, Top Gear, Chuck, American Idol, Burn Notice, Lost, Greek, Entourage, Friday Night Lights, Numb3rs, Hotel Babylon and South Park, which aren't new ones, for me, and now also FlashForward, Dollhouse, Mercy, Lie to Me and Glee. FlashForward has a very good idea, not the best of executions, but all in all, I enjoy it, and always look forward to the next episode. Dollhouse has an INCREDIBLE story, with GREAT execution, and it's now one of my favorite shows. Too bad there are only 7 episodes left, before it's kaput. Mercy is another show I don't love, but because I'm fucked up like that, I keep watching it, and will keep doing so until the last episode, probably. The same goes with Lie to Me, which, when told about, thought would be great, but the reality is that, much like Numb3rs, just runs in the background while I'm doing other stuff. And Glee. Ah, Glee. I love this show. It's just fun. It's terribly fun. The stereotypical characters might put you off, but it just helps the show, what with the story lines they've got for them. It is a little annoying that it's focused almost exclusively on Rachel and Finn (among the kids), but what are you gonna do? You have to have your main roles and your supporting roles, I guess. And now, my favorite performances from Glee, in order of broadcast:

1) "Don't Stop Believing". I love this song, and the performance was very ingenious, and very fun. My first brush with Glee was watching the Sam Tsui cover of it on YouTube, thinking that THAT was from the show, and that kinda got me watching the show.

2) "Somebody to Love". Again, another great song, and a good choreography, coupled with good singing, yet again.

3) "It's My Life" & "Confessions Part II" mash-up. I LOVE THIS! A great idea for a mash-up, and it is just so well performed. Just brilliant.

4) "You Can't Always Get What You Want". Might just be my favorite Rolling Stones song. Kind of a stretch, if we are to believe that they came up with the whole thing while waiting to go up and perform, but whatever.

5) "My Life Would Suck Without You". Very fun. And the collage of choreographies from past performances was a great idea.

AI8 Top 9 - Downloads? Huh?

2009-10-30T02:44:00.004+02:00

This theme is basically - pick whatever song you want, if we clear it you can sing it. Wierd.

Megan's hot, but she sucks! The performance was terrible too. Allison shouldn't have played the guitar. She wasn't great on it, and it didn't help the performance. And that dress! UGH! Scott gave his best performance so far. Nice. Lil's awful. Adam's still awesome. And Paula's high. And Kara's retarded. Kris was brilliant. Never heard an arrangement of "Ain't No Sunshine" quite like that. I don't know if it came from the computer, or from outside (where there are thunders right about now), but I heard thunders as it was ending. AWESOME!

About the results show - If anyone saw "The Comebacks" - the "Don't Stop Believing" there was much better...

AI8 Top 10 - Motown

2009-10-29T00:16:00.003+02:00

Before we get started, something about the new judge.

Kara. Kara's kinda hot. Sorta. But she's annoying. She can give good criticism, in stark comparison to the other judges. But, she's a sucker for big song-ending notes. And big notes in general. There's more to singing than that. And, during the auditions and Hollywood episodes, she used the sentence "raw, natural talent" quite often. And apparently, she doesn't know what that means. She seems to think it means whoever she told it to is great, naturally gifted, and ready to make it in the big leagues. But that's not the case. It means that, while talented, whoever she told it to still needs to refine his "raw, natural talent", and, in the contest of the series, will probably do better in a year or two. There, I'm glad I got that out of the way.

Oh, one other thing - for some reason, when going for the bigger notes, the contestants let their tongue slide out of their mouth. Slightly. Try to see it next time. Adam and Kris are two I remember doing it, on several occasions. It's kinda off-putting.

Adam was terrific. Allison was great. Kris was good. That's it. I guess...

AI8 Top 11 - Grand Ole Opry

2009-10-28T23:49:00.002+02:00

This might become a regular thing...

Some things I noticed:

Michael sucked. Allison wasn't that great tonight. Kris keeps improving. He still makes wierd faces when singing. Lil ain't no Carrie. Adam's crazy. He's a whackjob. Lunatic. What on earth was that?!?!!?? The vocals were good, but there ain't no one on the planet that can seperate them from the arrangement. That was WIERD. And to think he might have done great with the regular version, or with a one similar to what Daughtry did/stole/whatever with I Walk the Line, back in his time. Scott ain't all that and a bag of chips. He wouldn't be here if he wasn't blind. Sorry, but that's the truth. Alexis - meh. Danny sings wityh a "growl" that sounds like he's got phlegm, i.e. like he REALLY needs to cough. Disgusting. Anoop ROCKS! Megan's hot. HOT. But she can't dance. AT ALL. And Matt was very good. That's it. for now...

AI8 Top 13 - MJ Night

2009-10-28T17:10:00.005+02:00

I know I said I won't, but here are some things I thought about while watching this performance episode.

First off, I'm glad that it's a top 13, rather than a top 12, because the baker's dozen allows Anoop, aka Noop-Dogg, to get in, and I like him.

Now to several performances:

Kris' performance was, I thought, better than he got credit for. I know it wasn't technically the best of the night, and kinda average overall, but I loved it. LOVED it. The guitar might have seemed pointless, because it didn't really fit the song, and wasn't clearly heard AT ALL, for almost the entire song, but, speaking as someone who does (somewhat) play the guitar, I can imagine he feels much more comfortable while playing the guitar, and that helps him loosen up, and in my eyes, turn in his best performance yet, from his first audition 'till now. And you could see he was having fun. And he made funny silly faces. And the fact that he helped the others with their songs makes him just so much more awesome.

Allison, who from some angles is kinda cute, had a great performance. But I wasn't really concentrating on it, so that's it.

Anoop, I thought, didn't suck as badly as he was accused of sucking. It's a great song, and he did an OK version of it, but it wasn't terrible.

Megan's HOT. REALLY, REALLY, REALLY HOT. But that tattoo is hideous. And she can't dance.

* In earlier episodes, Nick/Norman was AWESOME! HILLARIOUS! And Neil Patrick Harris, aka Legendary Himself, Barney, was in da house, for two performance episodes. COOL *

And Adam's AWESOME.

That's it. For now...

Fuck This World...

2009-10-28T13:01:00.003+02:00

4-0? Seriously? WTF?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Real Madrid lost to Alcorcon from the second division, group B, 4-0. WTF?!?!?!?!?!?

And to make things better, the Cavs lost their season opener to the Celtics.

Fuck this world...

Blog, Are You There? It's Me... Blogger

2009-10-27T22:55:00.002+02:00

Hi there. It's been a while, hasn't it?

I've been quite busy, actually.

The first year of college/university ended. Sorta. I'm still trying to finish the second (third, but more of that, later) round of test (not new ones, but to improve grades and stuff). Two more are left. I'm not entirely lacking confidence. I think.

I finished basic training in the military. A month of nothing's and not-a-whole-lot's. I did shoot an M-16. A LOT. It was fun. I am now qualified to do that. But I don't have a license. Odd.

The second year of college started a couple of weeks ago. Nothing's new. All's the same.

That's basically it. I didn't get back to learning how to play the guitar. Too bad. I do want to, but I can't see myself doing it any time soon.

About American Idol - I finished watching season 7 (again-ish), and am not going to post reviews about it, or season 8 which I'm currently watching. I really don't have the mental strength and will to do that.

BUT, I will, hopefully, comment on the new season, once it will start, so that my opinion won't be years overdue.

Anything else? probably, but I can't remember. Seeya soon?

American Idol - The Thing That Should Be

2009-08-26T05:19:00.000+03:00

Below is a list of songs that probably won't ever be performed on Idol, which is a shame. If they were sung, they will immidiately be considered awesome. Depending on how good the perormance will be, they might stay that way, too.

More Than a Feeling - Boston
The Boys Are Back in Town - Thin Lizzy
Buddy Holly - Weezer
Sweet Child O' Mine - Guns 'n' Roses. That would be SO AWESOME!
Paradise City - Guns 'n' Roses. And any G'N'R, really.
Smells Like Teen Spirit - Nirvana
Any Nirvana, actually.
Metallica. Something? Anything?
Led Zeppelin. Other than once in the 8th season, nothing!
Rockstar - Nickleback. I know, i know, but this song has a special place in my heart...
Lynyrd Skynyrd - NOT ENOUGH!
ZZ Top - Especially Sharp Dressed Man, David Cook's performance of it with ZZ Top was awesome.
Stan - Eminem. I know it doesn't really fit, but this song gives me the chills EVERY SINGLE TIME.
Tears In Heaven - Eric Clapton. Ditto.
Hotel California - The Eagles. LOVE IT. Also, a good version of Desperado, to get us all to forget the catastrophe that was the third season...
House of the Rising Sun - The Animals. DITTO.
Some more Bob Marley, Bob Dylan, Beatles (and solo careers).
The Rolling Stones. PLEASE! Gimme more! PLEASE!
AC/DC? Maybe? Highway to Hell and Back in Black, expecially.
Some more Hallelujah, the Jeff Buckley arrangement. That's just so awesome.
Ziggy Stardust - David Bowie. He played guitar! Me likey. Plenty of other great ones from him.
Queen. Just more please.
Ramones. Just. Fucking. Awesome.
Red Hot Chili Peppers. More. More. More.
Wonderwall - Oasis.
Time of Your Life - Green Day. The Good Riddance one. Great. Great. Great.
I Love Rock 'n' Roll - Joan Jett. Coolness.
Aerosmith. YEAH! There are more than enough in seasons 7 and 8, but still!
Van Halen. Anything that's not You Really Got Me. Too much painful memories.
If someone goes out and does a heavy metal, Pantera or something, that'd be awesome. a terrible trainwreck, probably, but an awesome one at least.
The Allman Brothers Band. Pretty please?
Looser - Beck. I'm a looser baby, so why don't you kill me? LOL!
I Wanna Be Your Dog - The Stooges. Just for randy's comments.
Thirteen - Big Star. September Gurls would be fine too.
(Don't Fear) The Reaper - Blue Oyster Cult. Love it.
Surrender - Cheap Trick. Just do it.
Bon Jovi. Other than the season 6 Bon Jovi week, what?
On the Road Again - Willie Nelson. Yeah.
Jimi Hendix. I would LOVE to hear a guitar solo of his on Idol.
The Clash. U-huh.
Cream - Anything. Eric Clapton too.
Leonard Cohen. The best thing to come out of canada, and all you've got is one Hallelujah? And it's the Jeff Buckley version! (I have absolutely nothing against that version, in fact I love it...)
Proud Mary - Creedence Clearwater Revival. The CCR version. Complete with "Proud Mary keep on boinin'". lol!
Smoke on the Water - Deep Purple. I'll even play the bass part. Or at least the part of the base part that i actually know.
American Pie - Don McLean. All he's got on the show is vincent? seriously?
Depeche Mode. Personal jesus. Or the other good one. The "All i ever wanted" one.
RAP! HA!
The Doors. Just one tiny light my fire? COME ON!
Take Me Out - Franz Ferdinand. Who cares that their namesake was murdered? And that led to WWI (or WWII, don't remember which)?
Truckin' - Greatful Dead. Yep.
ABC - The Jackson 5. They really were great, back when they were all black.
Soul Man, and Solomon Burke's Everybody Needs Somebody to Love. NOT as group performances.
Pink Houses - John Mellencamp. Love it.
Spirit in the Sky - Norman Greenbaum. Brilliant.
Lola - The Kinks. Great. Just great.
Layla - Derek and the Dominos. Again, just great.
Behind Blue Eyes - Limp Bizkit. I LOVE it.
Ace of Spades - Motorhead.
All the Young Dudes - Mott the Hoople. With a song and band names like those two, how can you not love it?
I'm a Believer - The Monkees. A good, non-karaoke version.
Rockin' in the Free World - Neil Young. Hot. Hot. Hot.
Iris - Goo Goo Dolls. Great. Really great.
Hey There Delilah - Plain White T's. Very excellent, as randy once said. One doesn't count.
Hey Ya - Outkast. Kinda rap, but it's great!
How 'bout some Pink Floyd? huh?
Losing My Religion - REM. One of their best, if not the best.
I'm Too Sexy, Baby Got Back, Big Poppa - Just for the LOL factor.
The Sex Pistols. Just oh so great.
The Smiths? Maybe?
Black Hole Sun - Soundgarden. That'd be cool.
Sum 41. Fat Lip, or In Too Deep, expecially.
My Sharona - The Knack. So that simon can call whoever did it the next Prince, only to see him get out the next results show.
Keep On Runnin' - The Spencer Davis Group. If only because i can't find this anywhere.
Some Stevie Ray Vaughan.
Free Fallin' - Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers. Jus' 'cause.
Sweet Jane - The Velvet Underground. Yeah...
Bittersweet Symphony - The Verve. How cool is it that Richards and Jagger got co-writing credit?
Dance to the Music - Sly & the Family Stone. Would be fun to see.
Play That Funky Music - Wild Cherry. LOL... I know it's been done, twice, but still!
Do You Believe in Magic - The Lovin' Spoonful. I just like it...
Fake Plastic Trees - Radiohead.
For What It's Worth - Buffalo Springfield.
Fortunate Son - CCR.
Slow Ride - Foghat.
Fuck the Police - NWA. It would have to be pretaped, but it would be FUNNY to hear more bleeps than actual lyrics. LOL!
Go Your Own Way - Fleetwood Mac. If not Nadia, then someone, please?
Beach Boys. No one? No one?!?!?
Hit the Road Jack - Ray Charles. Who wouldn't want to hear more backup than actual singing by the contestant?
All Star - Smash Mouth. Why not? Just give it a try!
Eye of the Tiger - Survivor. Ditto. Why not?
U2 - Two songs don't count!
The Reason - Hoobastank. It's just stuck in my head... I think it's great.
Bad Day - Daniel Powter
Shine On You Crazy Diamond - Pink Floyd. Just to see someone TRY and cut down this song, from 26:11 to 90 seconds. ROFL!

that's it for now... a pretty hefty list, if i may add...

A Wierd Taste In Music

2009-08-26T04:59:00.002+03:00

That's right. I've got an eclectic (read: W-I-E-R-D) taste in music. I like just about anything. Except Mizrahit. I used to like it. A bit. I hate it now...

A small taste of my taste - the Beatles, the Rolling Stones, the Who, Bob Dylan, Bob Marley, AC/DC, Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, Red Hot Chili Peppers, U2, some ZZ Top, some Oasis, some Animals, some Elvis, some Eminem, some Guns 'n' Roses, some Metallica, Nirvana, Eric Clapton, Aerosmith, some Green Day, some Coldplay, some Radiohead, Queen, some Deep Purple, some Weezer, some REM, some Soundgarden, some Santana, some Jimi Hendrix, John Lennon, Paul McCartney, some George Harrison, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Neil Young, the Monkees, and more!

YEAH, I know...

As proof of this varied taste of mine, the next entry will be a list of songs I would like to see and hear performed on American Idol. and well.

In Haifa...

2009-08-18T18:54:00.002+03:00

I'm in Haifa today.

I'm staying in a friend's appartment. I was supposed to stay with my uncle and aunt, and their son and daughter, but that didn't go through...

On the train, I met 2 girls I went to high school and middle school with. One's REALLY hot. The other, not so much. I haven't seen them in a year or so. It was kinda cool. We talked. That's it.

I'm now in a shitty appartment in Nesher, which is basically the same as Haifa, but not really. Oh well.

Tomorrow, I need to go to a course from the army, I dunno... Something about how to write your CV. BUT I'M NOT EVEN 19!!! AND I WON'T BE LOOKING FOR A JOB IN THE NEXT 9 YEARS!!! I dunno...

Anyway, there are some good news. My cousin was sick for the last week or so. He had really high fever. The doctors didn't know if it was swine flu or not. Today I found out he's healthy again. YAY!

Alright, that's it. I think...

American Idol

2009-08-11T15:00:00.001+03:00

That's it. I'm really done now. No more of this frm me. Buh bye!

American Idol S06E20 - Top 12

2009-08-08T17:31:00.003+03:00

We are finally here. The top 12. And theme weeks. This week, it's Diana Ross, and she's helping the kids.

First though, some pimping of the show and it's alumni. Then it's a tour of the stage. Then, after some banter, some pimping of Diana Ross. And then we see her meet the top 12.

1) Brandon - "Can't Hurry Love" by The Supremes. The start, with the back to the audience, SUCKED. Not good at all. And he forgot the lyrics. And let it show.

COCA COLA! The hardest part of the competition for Melinda's the high heels and dresses. LOL. Ryan asks Simon to give her pointers about the high heels. LOL. Simon says Ryan should know. LOL. Ryan tells Simon to stay out of his closet. LOL. Simon tells Ryan to come out of it. ROFL!!! Melinda's embarassed as heck.

2) Melinda - "Home" by Diana Ross. She's too good for AI. She's a great singer, a great performer, and yet she's incredibly shy and cute. Amazing... And she doesn't know how good she is. And she made Paula cry. How can you not love her???

3) Chris S. - "Endless Love" by Diana Ross & Lionel Richie. He looks wierd sans-glasses. T'was a'ight.

4) Gina - "Love Child" by the Supremes. Loud. Not terrible.

5) Sanjaya - "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" by Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell. What happened to his hair??? It SUCKED! The "dancing" too. And the ending. Yuck...

COCA COLA! Nothing interesting...

6) Haley - "Missing You" by Diana Ross. Breathy. That can really drive me crazy. And she effed the lyrics. Simon made her cry, by giving her compliments!

7) Phil - "I'm Gonna Make You Love Me" by the Supremes & the Temptations. Creepy. Good, but creepy.

8) LaKisha - "God Bless the Child" by Billie Holiday. WOW...

COCA COLA! Blake listens to "cool" music.

9) Blake - "You Keep Me Hanging On" by the Supremes. Wierd. Good, but wierd.

10) Stephanie - "Love Hangover" by Diana Ross. Pretty good. I guess.

11) Chris R. - "The Boss" by Diana Ross. Pretty weak. I dunno...

12) Jordin - "If We Hold On Together" by Diana Ross. Very good. Very very good.

1. Melinda

2. LaKisha

3. Jordin

4. Stephanie

5. Blake

6. Phil

7. Gina

8. Chris S.

9. Chris R.

10. Haley

11. Brandon

12. Sanjaya

Real Madrid - Toronto FC

2009-08-08T16:26:00.003+03:00

Real Madrid beat Toronto FC 5-1 a few hours ago. WOOHOO!!!

Some observations:

* Cristiano Ronaldo's getting more and more comfortable. It's going to be scary!

* Raul's AWESOME! He just never seases to work and amaze me.

* Kaka's brilliant. He didn't have the best of games, as it was his first in Real, but he organised the offensive game so well, and rarely made a mistake.

* IKER!!! ALBIOL!!! ARBELOA!!! All these three played their first game for Real (for Iker it was the first game n this preseason), and all played well, though they didn't shine, as they weren't called for any heroic actions/whatever.

* Lass. Lass. Lass. The guy's the closest thing I've ever seen to Makalele, without actually being Makalele. BRILLIANT.

* Guti doesn't suck. He had some good actions, but not enough to warrant a starting role when the actual season starts.

* Benzema's really good. He's not just a target striker, he can start attacks too, and do it well. He can also play near the sidelines, which is an advantage.

* Granero. MY GOD, Granero... The guy can play EVERY single offensive position, and play it well. I'm so glad Real bought him back.

* Sneijder continues to work hard every second he's on the pitch.

* Robben, when healthy, is one of the best players in the world, especially when he's not locked into selfish mode.

* Xabi Alonso. Perfect. Didn't do a whole lot offensively, but whenever he got the ball, he did EXACTLY what he should have, and he played good defense.

* Miguel Torres was the captain, after Raul, Iker and Guti came off the pitch. SERIOUSLY???

* Negredo's good. Very good. Good enough to stay? Probably not...

Next game's sunday night (Israel time), in Washingtn DC, against DC United. Seeya then!

PS - According to the Spanish newspaper As, Perez has closed the terms of Ribery's contract (5 years, beginning next season) with the player and his agent, and predictions are that Bayern Munich will agree to sell the player next summer for 25 M Euros. WOW...

Real Madrid Background

2009-08-07T14:45:00.002+03:00

As you probably know by know, I'm a Real Madrid fan.

I wanted to have a background about Real, with the new purchases, as well as the best players that were already here, and decided that instead of asking for someone to make/find me one, I'd do it myself.

And this is the result.

I mysel am very proud of it, as it is the first thing I made using photoshop in 5 years or so, and I never really sat down to learn how to use the program well.

And this is where you come in. If anyone's reading this, please take a look and tell me what you think. It's kinda important for me...

American Idol S06E19 - Top 16 Results

2009-08-06T07:09:00.003+03:00

16 become 12 as the semifinalists are revealed.

GROUP PERFORMANCE: "Stuck in the Middle With You" by Stealers Wheel. Very cool song, cool performance.

Then it's a recap of the performances.

Results! LaKisha and Blake join Ryan at centerstage. They're both through. Chris S.'s next. Ryan gives him a heart-attack. After the break, he's through. Jordin's next. And through. Phil's next. He's nervous. He's through. He's shocked. Jared's next. And he's outta here! He sings.

American Idol Challenge, again. This one's the easiest so far... It's C, dumbass.

Melinda and Brandon are up. And through. Chris R. and Gina are next. And through.

A pause in the results, as we see a clip about Carrie. AND SHE'S HERE!!! I LOVE HER!!! GUEST SONG: "Wasted" by Carrie Underwood. She's still hot and beautiful. And great.

Back to the results. Antonella and Stephanie join Ryan at centerstage. Antonella's outta here. Stephanie's through. Antonella sings.

Haley and Sabrina are next. They're both crying. Haley's through. Sabrina's outta here.

This is AI's 200th episode. WOW... The surprise is that they are going to do a telethon thing in the top 6 stage - Idol Gives Back. Cool. Borat will be there, as will Gwen Stefani, Pink, Bono and others. COOL!

Sanjaya and Sundance are the last ones left. Sundance's outta here. Sanjaya's through. Sundance sings. And it was AWESOME. We see the ousted's journeys on Idol.

American Idol S06E18 - Top 16: Top 8 Girls

2009-08-06T06:16:00.002+03:00

8 girls, blah blah blah...

Paula was missing because she gave Randy a BJ. I didn't say that...

1) Jordin - "Heartbreaker" by Pat Benatar. She's a football fan! DUDE! AWESOME! It was really fun. I really like this song, and I really like it on her.

2) Sabrina - "Don't Let Go (Love)" by En Vogue. Meh. Screechy.

3) Antonella - "Put Your Records On" by Corinne Bailey Rae. She's really, REALLY hot. AND she sucks! HA!

4) Haley - "If My Heart Had Wings" by Faith Hill. People say she's hot. I don't get people.

5) Stephanie - "Sweet Things" by Chaka Khan.

6) LaKisha - "I Have Nothing" by Whitney Houston. She's terrified of animals. LOL.

7) Gina - "Call Me When You're Sober" by Evanescence. I really like this song.

8) Melinda - "I'm a Woman" by Peggy Lee. Her OCD's so cute. The performance was AWESOME!

1. Melinda

2. Gina

3. LaKisha

4. Jordin

5. Sabrina

6. Stephanie

7. Haley

8. Antonella

American Idol S06E17 - Top 16: Top 8 Guys

2009-08-06T05:18:00.003+03:00

8 guys are left. Tonight they perform.

1) Blake - "All Mixed Up" by 311. And in tonight's filler segments, we'll get to know the contestants better. YAY! Blake loves improv comedy, and Halloween is the best time of the year for him. The breathing noises at the start sucked. Once he got going, it was very nice. Not a great song, not great singing, not too difficult, either, but it was nice. Randy loved it, even though he didn't recognize the song. Paula's interested. Simon agrees with the other two.

COCA COLA! Sundance was emotional in the previous results show, because Chris R. was crying. Sanjaya looks like a chick. He was shocked that he got through last week.

2) Sanjaya - "Waiting on the World to Change" by John Mayer. He can Hula. He really is the girliest dude ever. And, in accordance with the girly-ness of his, he sucks. Get it? Get it? That really was terrible. Randy doesn't see anything special about him, and he used to. Paula's speechless. Simon says it wasn't as bad as last week, and calls him on his Paula hairstyle. And then the ever gay Ryan comes up on stage and announces he's sure one of the two (Paula and Sanjaya) has extensions, but he's not sure which one. ROFL!

3) Sundance - "Jeremy" by Pearl Jam. He "reveals" that he wears a fat-suit when he's on the show. Ha. Ha. Ha. Who sings Pearl Jam on the Idol? I mean, the song's great. The video of it is even better. But to sing it on Idol? It was precisely what you'd expect it to be - shouty, loud, incoherent at parts, and quite a mess. But it's a great song! Randy loves that he put a southern rock thing on a Pearl Jam song. Paula's redundant. Simon didn't like it as much as last week.

Travis Tritt's in the house, and Randy's working on his next album.

4) Chris R. - "Tonight I Wanna Cry" by Keith Urban. He used to be "chunky". And he lost 40 pounds. WOW. There's something wierd about his vibrato or falsetto or both. I dunno. Last week he was great. This week he was just OK. Randy thinks he's in it to win it. Duh. Paula's "smart". Simon thinks it was good, but he's not jumping out of his chair.

All the guys do the "Jared Cotter Face Mask". Ha.

5) Jared - "If You Really Love Me" by Stevie Wonder. He played college basketball. Cool. And he does a forced "sexy" Stevie song. He just relies to heavily on the female vote. And there are a lot of girls that aren't impressed by the whole playing with the camera/Jarred-Cotter-face-mask thing, and won't vote for him. Or at least I hope so. Randy thought he gave a solid performance and it was actually good. Paula's helpful! Simon understands Paula. AH!

Phil kisses the judges' asses. Brandon too, I think.

6) Brandon - "I Just Want to Celebrate" by Rare Earth. He's a classical piano player. I dunno. Ugh. Ummm... I guess it was alright, but there was nothing to it. He just sang it. He sang it well enough, but something's missing. I dunno. Randy thought he messed the end.

Alright. I'm done. I give up. I'm tired of this. I am now officially stopping doing this as I have so far. I will just post the rating for each performance episode. I'll write a short recap of each results show, but none of this in depth thing any more. I'll tell you the truth, the main reason I started doing this was because there weren't any of this things to be found for the first several seasons, but there are more than enough for this season onwards. So I'm done-ish.

7) Phil - "I Need You" by LeAnn Rimes. He used to have hair, and Randy was in Journey.

8) Chris S. - "Wanna Be Loved" by dc Talk. I really like this dude.

1. Chris S.

2. Blake

3. Chris R.

4. Sundance

5. Brandon

6. Jared

7. Phil

8. Sanjaya

American Idol S06E16 - Top 20 Results

2009-08-05T03:08:00.003+03:00

20 hopefuls stand before us. 4 will be shot to death for our viewing pleasure. Well, not really, but you know...

American Idol Challenge and Kelli Pickler. Can't wait.

More than 32 million votes were phoned/texted in. We get a recap of the performances that earned those votes.

GROUP PERFORMANCE: "Joy to the World" by Three Dogs Night. Jeremiah was a bullfrog! WOOHOO!!! That was very good! Very fun! YAY!

The guys are nervous. FORD! Phil's safe. Chris S.'s safe. Sundance's safe. Blake's safe. Jared joins Ryan at centerstage. And he's safe. Ryan asks Nick to stand and immediately shatters his dreams. He's outta here. He's told he sucks by the judges. And he sings.

The girls are sad. Stephanie's safe. Gina's safe. Sabrina's safe. Melinsda's safe. Alaina's outta here. She's happy with the experience. She sings.

American Idol Challenge - Another stupid question. And another B.

Kelli Pickler's here! She's HAWT! Her boobs are bigger. Hmmm... HAWT! She tried sushi for the first time. And she talks about spider sushi. She bought shoes. Just shoes. GUEST SONG: "I Wonder" by Kelli Pickler.

The boys are up again. Chris R.'s safe. Brandon's safe. Sanjaya and AJ are the only ones left, and they join Ryan at centerstage. AJ's outta here. Sanjaya's safe. He's shocked. AJ's not so much. He sings.

Back to the girls. LaKisha's safe. Haley's safe. Antonella, Leslie and Jordin join Ryan at centerstage. Antonella's safe. Leslie's outta here. Jordin's safe. Gina's crying. We see Nick, Alaina, AJ and Leslie's journeys on Idol. Yep, Daughtry's still singing "Home". Leslie sings.

American Idol S06E15 - Top 20: Top 10 Girls

2009-08-05T01:04:00.003+03:00

FINALLY, I'm back to reviewing AI. That was a long hiatus...

Ten girls are left. Not for long, though... We get some banter between the judges and Ryan. I'm bored already.

1) Gina - "Alone" by Heart. Again with the dedication bullshit? Gina dedicates this performance to her boyfriend. Bored. Carrie did this song. It was one of her best performance. And Gina dares try it??? She wasn't bad. She was actually sorta good. Not Carrie good, but good. Randy calls it pitchy to begin with. Paula's stunned-ish. Simon thought it was forced at the end. Randy tries for a LONG time to make fun of Simon's fashion sense, unsuccessfully. Paula doesn't do a better job, either.

COCA COLA! Ryan's got the hots for LaKisha.

2) Alaina - "Not Ready to Make Nice" by Dixie Chicks. She dedicates the song to her mom. Bored. She's really pushing for some sympathy/whatever votes. HAND GESTURES!!! ARGH!!! It was pitchy throughout. The song choice was kinda nice, but she had some enunciation and phrasing problems with it. She ran out of air. It was pretty bad. Randy thought the tuning and pitch went away at the chorus, and thought it was a mess. Paula's comforting. Simon compares it to Randy running in a 100 m race.

3) LaKisha - "Midnight Train to Georgia" by Gladys Knight & the Pips. She's dedicating the song to her grandmother. NICE. GREAT song choice. Remember when Paris sang it last season? Well, LaKisha was even better. It was REALLY good. Great. Fantastic. I L-U-V LaKisha. Randy thought it was HAWT. Paula's mumbling. Simon thought it wasn't as good as last week.

And the Ryan's proving he's gay. He's joined by Simon in the circle of gayness VERY quickly, though. So don't be sad for him. Or perhaps be even sadder?

4) Melinda - "My Funny Valentine" by Mitzi Green. She dedicates this performance to her Gayle's. HUH? This is where previous performances come in to help you - the last to perform this song was Constantine. There's no way in hell this is gonna pale in comparison to THAT... And it doesn't. It's brilliant. Fantastic. Awesome. She's almost too good for this show. Scratch that, She IS too good for this show. Randy called it unbelievable. Paula's applauding. Simon calls in incredible. Melinda's shocked.

5) Antonella - "Because You Love Me" by Celine Dion. She's nervous. She's HOT! She dedicates the song to her brother, Vincenzo. Vincenzo? SERIOUSLY??? She sucks. She's just terrible. But she's HOT. It was really, REALLY awful. It was painful at places. Randy says the song was way too big for her, and the pitch was all over the place. Paula's a moron. Simon thought it just wasn't good enough.

6) Jordin - "Reflection" by Christina Aguilera. She dedicates the song to her younger brother, whose name is apparently Blowjob. I dunno. It was a bit erratic at places, but overall very good. Not Melinda good, or LaKisha good, but very good. She cries. Randy thought it was pitchy at places, but he's very impressed by her. Paula's sick. Simon thought it was excellent, when compared to some of the others.

Kelli will make an appearance in the results show! WOOHOO! Stephanie says the girls aren't competitive.

7) Stephanie - "Dangerously In Love" by Beyonce. She dedicates the song to her parents. Bored. The song sucks. She did what she could with it, but the song REALLY sucked! Randy thought she sang her face off. Paula's drunk. Simon's drunk. He thought it was terrific.

Leslie's awkward as heck...

8) Leslie - "Feeling Good" by Nina Simone. She dedicates the song to her grandfather. This song? Again? The beginning, with the long violin note in the background, was wierd. It picked up a bit, and she ended better than she started, but it was just there. Eh. Meh. Bleh. Whatever. The scatting was terrible. Like REALLY bad. Randy thought it was pitchy. It was just a'ight for him. Paula's stupid. Simon says (LOL!) Paula liked it because the skatting sounded like Paula's talking. BURN! He thought she's getting lost, having followed better performances.

Ryan recites Leslie's skatting. Ha.

9) Haley - "Queen of the Night" by Whitney Houston. She dedicates it to her fiancee. Awww. Bored. Why Whitney? Why would she do that to herself? It was "jumpy", "whore-y", "shouty", "pitchy", "insert not favorable adjective here-y". Not really good. Not at all. SHOCKER! She lied about her fiancee being away! He's right there in the audience! Randy thought it was a more background than lead singer song, and that it wasn't great. Paula's deaf. Simon gives her "A" for effort, thought it was manic verging at insane at points. And that it paled in comparison.

10) Sabrina - "All the Man That I Need" by Whitney Houston. She's dedicating the song to her grandmother. She's arrogant. I hate her. She smiles too much. The song's terrible. She did OK. I really couldn't care, though. The ending sucked. Randy says something about something. Paula's happy. Simon thought she was on the limit of shouting.

1. Melinda

2. LaKisha

3. Jordin

4. Gina

5. Sabrina

6. Stephanie

7. Haley

8. Leslie

9. Alaina

10. Antonella

Football News!

2009-08-04T23:49:00.002+03:00

Maccabi Haifa, after a goal-less tie in Kazakhstan last week, found themselves 3 goals down after just 15 minutes tonight in Haifa.

God that sucked.

But, eventually, after many stressful minutes, Maccabi was finally able to come away with a 4-3 victory, and the ticket to the next round. Phew...

It just seemed, for the first quarter of an hour of the game, that the people over at Maccabi just forgot that, usually, the other team can attack as well. After that initial shock, Haifa actually started playing football, and quite well at times.

Let's just say I'm glad that's over...

And in Real Madrid news - XABI ALONSO!!!! Liverpool and Real have come to an agreement for the purchase of the basque by the Spanish club, for a sum of 30 million Euros, according to the Spanish media. YAY!!!! NOW I'm happy. NOW the team's completed. NOW Real can start kicking some major ass (*fingers crossed*)!

News!

2009-08-04T01:53:00.004+03:00

News! That's right, news!

What I've done recently - NOTHING! JK...

* I saw Fanboys. And can I just say, I LOVE geek jokes. Geek jokes are the best. Geek jokes rock!

* I had a test, in Solid Mechanics, and I did alright, I think. No more test for a month (Probably)!

* I moved out of my dorm room, and as of now will not be able to get a dorm room next year. DAMN. I need to start looking for an apartment soon. I dunno...

* I saw Knocked Up. Seth Rogen's not easy to look at. He's kinda ugly. BUT! He's funny. Really funny. The whole "team", Jay, Jason, Seth, Martin and Jonah, are funny people. Really funny. And Paul Rudd's a good actor. Funny, in a different way. And not as much. But still. And Katherine Heigl's HAWT!

* I also saw Observe and Report. That movie made no sense. It's Seth Rogen's version of Paul Blart: Mall Cop. It's funny at parts. And makes no sense at others. What ev...

* I ALSO saw Road Trip: Beer Pong. GOD, that sucked. Road Trip was really good. Euro Trip was pretty good. This movie just sucked. Everything about it sucked. Except for the tits. They were awesome.

* Real Madrid news - Alvaro Arbeloa was purchased! Yay! Gabriel Heinze left for Marseille. OK. Parejo was transfered to Getafe, with an option of re-purchase for the first 2 years. Good. Alberto Bueno wasn't a Real Madrid player for several weeks when I last wrote about Real. He's now in Valladolid. Again, Real has a re-purchase option, for some duration of time. I think. AND! Xabi Alonso's transfer to Madrid is reportedly all but agreed upon. He stayed in Spain, while the team, Liverpool, returned to England. I just hope he signs for Real soon.

That's it. I think. Oh well...

Real Madrid Round Up

2009-07-25T11:07:00.003+03:00

So, where are we currently standing?

Real Madrid currently has 30 or so players on its rosters, at least 5 of which have got to go before August 31st (well, actually, before September 1st, but who wants all that last minute scrambling, any way?).

And the players are the following: Iker Casillas, Jerzey Dudek, Michel Salgado, Sergio Ramos, Raul Albiol, Miguel Torres, Christoph Metzelder, Pepe, Gabriel Heinze, Marcelo, Eziquiel Garay, Roysthon Drenthe, Mahmadou Diarra, Lassana Diarra, Fernando Gago, Dani Parejo, Wesley Sneijder, Rafael Van der Vaart, Guti, Kaka, Arjen Robben, Cristiano Ronaldo, Raul, Gonzalo Higuain, Ruud Van Nistelrooy, Klaas Jan Huntelaar, Karim Benzema, Alvaro Negredo, Esteban Granero and Alberto Bueno.

Sure fire to be in the squad next season - Iker (no explanation needed), Dudek (just signed an extension, will be the second GK), Sergio Ramos (come on), Raul Albiol (15 M and will leave?), Torres (rotation), Pepe (one of the best in the world at his position), Lass (one of the sole rays of light from last season), Kaka (COME ON!), C. Ronaldo (SERIOUSLY!), Raul (DUDE!), Higuain (the other ray of light...), Benzema (MAN!) and Granero (just bought and coach likes). 12.

Who else? Salgado, Marcelo, Gago, Sneijder, Guti. They'll probably stay. 17. Either Hienze will stay or someone will be purchased (Arbeloa) to replace him. 18. Metzelder, I guess. 19. Ruud and Mahmadou seem to be staying. 21. Garay, too. 22.

On the outs are Drenthe (almost certain), Parejo (already out), VdV (probably), Robben (probably not), Huntelaar (most definitely), Negredo (question of time) and Bueno (back to Castilla/loan thingy to another club).

Assuming Robben stays, 23. Add to that Xabi Alonso (*fingers crossed*), and that's 24. And keep VdV for good measure. 25. Success! Now, if only it were this easy in real life...

On a side note, and a completely unrelated one at that, I HATE LAPORTA! The president of Barcelona. I HATE HIM!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! He said Real's purchases were imperialistic, said that Barca doesn't buy players, it grows them, and then goes and almost, ALMOST, offers 92 MILLION EUROS!!! for Ibrahimovic. Then, Eto'o appears to have agreed to move to Inter, so it's only going to cost Barca 40 M. And he dares to say that this buy isn't expensive. I HATE HIM!!!!!!! *fingers crossed the deals falls through, and Zlatan stays in Inter*

Some Stuff...

2009-07-25T09:27:00.003+03:00

MOVIES!

I recently watched, and quite enjoyed, the following films -

17 Again - Nice little idea, not great execution...
Angels & Demons - Okay, the film wasn't great, but I just loved the book, and therefor had to like the movie...
Fast and Furious - The previous were better, but I liked the "reunion" and all. Though Michelle Rodriguez's role was irrelevent, and not needed, really...
Fired Up - I usually hate films where the antagonists are "awesome" and everything goes their way, except for one small thing, and this is one of those films. But I liked it.
Ghosts of Girlfriends Past - Another one of the aformentioned type of films. And to top it if, it's a pure and unadultered chick flick. Not that good. My sister would love it.
Land of the Lost - Crazy. Stupid. Hot chick. Two funny actors. What's not to like?
Step Brothers - Crazy. Stupid. Two funny actors. An a capella version of "Sweet Child O' Mine". What's not to like?
Terminator: Salvation - My first foray into Terminator territory. There. I said it. As such, EVERYTHING was new to me, and I quite enjoyed it.
The Hangover - Doug, the guy getting married was in National Treasure. Yeah. This movie is LOL-inducing. Seriously. I was sitting in my room, at 3 AM, laughing out loud. Seriously.
Three Kings - Released 10 years ago, and watched it just this week. I kinda liked it. Not really, but kinda.

CAR!

We got our old car back... BTW...

TV!

Shows I am watching update - Hotel Babylon (British people are the coolest), Entourage (YEAH!), Top Gear (see: Hotel Babylon), Burn Notice, Greek, Survivor, CSI, CSI: Miami, CSI: NY, South Park, American Idol, Chuck, Dexter (DAMN!), Friday Night Lights, Heroes, House, How I Met Your Mother (awesome, suit up!, and other apropriate Barney-isms), Lost, Numb3rs, The Big Bang Theory, The Simpsons and Futurama. Wheeooo....

GUITAR!

I am making zero progress. BUT! I have found a good place to learn from (for free, too!). After the last test (Next Sunday), I'll start working harder on improving.

HEADPHONES!

UPDATE: NONE of my headphones work. The set I am currently using, I have to twist the cord to get the right earpiece to work. ARGH!!! I really need to buy new ones...

That's it. You may proceed whatever it was you were doing before you stumbled upon this fascinating piece of information. Dismissed.

New Car, For Now...

2009-07-23T02:52:00.002+03:00

We got a new car.

Well, not really. Our car's in the garage, and because it's leased, they gave us a new one. It's one of those HYOOOGE Chevrolet SUV/Minivans. Dunno what's it called.

The only good thing about it, is the stereo. It can play MP3 CDs. That's it. Yeah.

I pretty much hate it, and am anxiously waiting for the return of our car, a Honda FRV. MUCH better.

Though, I'll admit, if I had to, I could get used to the monster we have right now...

How I Met Your Mother

2009-07-23T02:46:00.002+03:00

I admit. I didn't want to watch this series. I thought the idea was lame.

I watched it. It was, to quote a great character, "legen, wait for it, and you better not be lactose intolerant, 'cause the second half of the word is - dary!". LOL!

This show is awesome. Barney's awesome. And Robin's hot, even though she's Canadian (in real life too...).

I finished all four seasons available, and am now waiting for the 5th season's premiere, somewhere in September... Booo....

Glantoren 0-4 Maccabi Haifa

2009-07-23T00:38:00.002+03:00

I'm still not sure how to write that Northern Irish team's name, but as of today, I won't need to either.

Maccabi Haifa just beat them, 4 goals to nil.

Again, the match was pretty boring, and Haifa easily beat their opponent.

Next up, another team whose name I don't know how to write! They're the Kazakh champions, apparently. I dunno...

Shamrock Rovers 0-1 Real Madrid

2009-07-21T00:16:00.002+03:00

YAY!!!!! WOOHOO!!!!!!!!!

Real Madrid just beat Shamrock Rovers, 1 goal to nil. Yeah, I know, it's not really impressive, but it's just the first game, they still need to gel.

Good things - Cristiano Ronaldo. YEAH! Raul's looking good. Lass is still good. Sneijder and VDV were impressive. Benzema showed glimpses of what he can do, scored the only goal, and was one of the best players tonight. Parejo was pretty good.

Bad things - Defense. A normal team would have scored against Real tonight, at least once. Gago's trying too hard, Higuain not enough.

All in all, not a great match, and I'm looking forward to the next match, in which Kaka, Casillas, Ramos and Albiol should be playing.

Maccabi Haifa 6-0 Gelantorn

2009-07-15T22:48:00.002+03:00

Maccabi Haifa just thrashed Gelantorn, the Northern Irish champion, 6 goals to nil.

The first half was mainly disappointment, with some good moments, but not a lot. The second half was much better, with 5 of the goals coming in those 45 minutes.

Haifa played very well, especially in the 2nd half, but the opponent weren't of a good enough quality to be able to say that they are in good shape. Hopefully though, after the rest that will be next week's leg 2 match, the players will be more than well rested, and will come to the next round prepared.

With this victory, Maccabi are all but through to the 3rd Round of qualifications to the Champions League. *fingers crossed that they get to the group stage!* *knock on wood*

The two new players in the club, Teixeira and Dablishvili, both started, and debuted, and both played well, with the Georgian striker being more impressive.

He scored 2 goals, joined on the scoring sheet by Refaelov, Katan, Arbeitman and Gadir.

I'M HAPPY!!!

Bored and Tired

2009-07-10T13:07:00.002+03:00

Yes, I'm bored and tired as FUCK!

Some good news though:

* I have decided that I want to study. I KNOW! I will finish my degree, if they let me that is, and I will go to classes and do the homework necessary. YAY! And next semester, it will be easier to do all that, as I will share a room and live next to friends, one of which has the same "major" as I do (it's not really a major, but that's the closest thing to it, and the only way I can explain it.).

* There was a physics test on Wednesday. I barely studied, being stupid like that, but it was still a'ight. The problem was the fucking test. The teachers got it about 10 minutes before the test started, so they didn't get a chance to go over it. Because of that, they cancelled one question, out of ten, mid-way through the test. Of the other 9, I knew i got 3 right, was sort of sure about 2 others, and really guessed the other 4. It is 2 days later, and they decided to axe 4 questions and give everyone the 40 points (in one of those, they accepted 2 answers). In the end, yours truly, according to the answers published and the questions cancelled, should get a 90. WOOHOO! And I think they got one of the answers wrong, which would mean I'd get 100. WOOHOO!

* Benzema was presented last night as a Real Madrid player. "Only" 30,000 fans came to see him. Poor boy. No number yet for him, as he is waiting to see which players leave and which numbers free up before deciding (9 and 10, his previous numbers, are currently occupied).

* Real Madrid's pre-season has officially started today, with almost all the players, minus Iker, Sergio Ramos, Albiol, Kaka and a couple of youngsters-ish, practicing together for the first time. Yes, CR9's there. Yes, Benzema's there. And yes, Raul's there. The missing players got a permission to extend their vacations due to playing for their international team/sub-21 international team. They will be back before the month's over. YAY!

* The draw for the order of games in La Liga next season will take place today. I will post back with important dates, such as the Clasico, derbys, and such.

* Dexter. O. M. G. I saw the first episode, and was head over heels in love with this show. I am now about half way through the second season (12 episodes per), and I can honestly say I love this show. Michael C. Hall's one of the best actors on TV, and the two chicks closest to Dexter, Deb and Rita, dunno the actresses' names, are seriously hot, in a not-the-best-tits-and-not-the-most-beautiful-but-still-really-hot kinda way. I can almost, ALMOST, imagine myself actually dating someone that looks like on of them. Why almost? Well, that's a whole 'nother subject, I'm not quite ready to share with the world. All 3 of you reading. That's probably about 3 more than are really reading...

* The next test is in 3 days or so, and I don't know a single thing. I think I may have to do a Moed B, which is to say do the test again at a later date. It actually be a Moed C, as I will be in bootcamp (probably) when the Moed B will take place.

* Oh, yeah. Bootcamp. About that. In a couple of months or so, I will be whisked off for 4 weeks, and go through bootcamp. Plenty of time left before that little piece of "fun", but I'm already anxious/fearful/excited. Is that wrong?

Cristiano Ronaldo! 9! Cristiano Ronaldo!

2009-07-07T12:44:00.002+03:00

HE'S HERE!!!!!

Last night, at 21:00 local time, Cristiano Ronaldo was introduced as a Real Madrid player, in front of 80,000 fans in the Santiago Bernabeu, and 10,000 outside of the stadium. AAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cristiano, or Ronaldo, depends on who you ask, chose the number 9, as his first two choices for the number, 7 and 17, were already taken by Raul and van Nistelrooy.

All I can say - YAY!!!!! WOOHOO!!!!!!!!

Eusebio, one of the greatest Portugese players (he's from Angola or something, but player for Portugal), was in attendance, and was full of praise for the young footballer.

American Idol S06E14 - Top 20: Top 10 Guys

2009-07-05T19:20:00.005+03:00

10 guys, and all that other bullshit. And yes, this stil IS American Idol. Jennifer Hudson won an Oscar. The show's taking credit. Did you expect anything else?

1) Phil - "Missing You" by John Waite. He dedicates the song to the Navy. NOT his daughters, the Navy. He's in the Navy, as a SINGER. Gosh... HAND GESTURES!! ARGH!!!! FUCK YOU!!! Sorry about that. It was a'ight. His voice sounded wierd. It was a'ight. And he sings about NOT missing the Navy? LOL! The last part of it, minus the ending, was quite good. But overall, just OK. Randy thought it was hot. HUH??? Paula's delusional. Simon's not jumoing out of his chair. He quite liked the bit towards the end, but he's not hearing anything unique.

COCA COLA! Sundance hears people telling him not to be crappy. AJ's got Mixed Emotions. Rolling Stones reference. LOVE IT! Jared will do Marvin Gaye.

2) Jared - "Let's Get It On" by Marvin Gaye. GROSS. He dedicates it to his parents. After I finished puking and got to actually watch the performance, I was pleasantly surprised. The performance part of it could have been better, but the singing was very good! I quite liked it! The hand acros the face at the end SUCKED! Randy heard pitchiness, but loved the face move. Paula's steaming. Simon says she's funny. Once. Then Paula starts going into a later timeslot sort of show. Simon was reminded of the Love Boat. Jared says it would have been a great love boat. LOL! It's all falling apart! LOL!

3) AJ - "Feeling Good" by Nina Simone. He too dedicates the song to his parents. The violins filled start was yucky. Other than that, it was pretty good. The problem is, I don't know if it was the song I was diggin', 'cause I really like this song, or the vocals. I think it's the song... Randy loves the improvement. Paula's 5 yr old. Simon says it was nearly very good. LOL. "Chuning problems".

4) Sanjaya - "Steppin' Out With My Baby" by Tony Bennett. He dedicates the song to his grandpa. He died. Awww... That alone will win him a couple thousands of votes. His performance shouldn't earn him any. The look was horrible, the "moves" were terrible, the singing was sub-par, like WAY sub-par, and again, he's too quiet! The ending SUCKED. Randy called it bad high school talent show. Paula's wierd. She doesn't like Simon. LOL! Simon called it a ghastly post-lunched, dressed-up-by-parents-and-asked-to-sing, and not good.

5) Chris S. - "Trouble" by Ray LaMontagne. He dedicates it to his HOT!!! wife. I really like him. And his singing. The fact that he's just so darn chubby just adds to it. VERY good performance. The first one tonight, other than the hand that was Jared, to bring both a performance that's good, and a good vocal. Randy likes that he's good. Paula's inconsistent. Simon thought he proved he's a good singer. He was worried about singing "Trouble" to his wife, but thinks the words worked it out.

6) Nick - "Fever" by Peggy Lee. He dedicates it to his girlfriend. Is he seriously going to sing "Fever"? a dude? SERIOUSLY? The whole performance seemed awkward. He might heave sung it OK, but he's a DUDE! Singing "Fever"! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! Randy likes that he's better than last week. It was very pitchy, and he was rushing in bits, but it was kinda nice. Paula's redundant. Simon thought it was good, but he lacked charisma. Sorry, I mean "charismar".

COCA COLA! Blake thinks he needs to step it up.

7) Blake - "Virtual Insanity" by Jamiroquai. He dedicates it to his parents. Finally, FINALLY, a Jamiroquai songon Idol. FINALLY. I REALLY liked it! And the beatboxing's back! VERY good! Again, it's a welcome change up from all those old song. VERY GOOD! Randy likes him. He talks a lot about all the things I said. Paula's a fan. Simon thought the first part was a copycat, the second was great, and in the last the "chuning" went.

8) Brandon - "Time after Time" by Cyndi Lauper. He dedicates it to his grandma. It was really boring. And not exceptionally good. Not really good, either. Not good, at all. That was a backup singer's performance. He thinks it didn't fo enough for him vocally. And it was boring. Brandon makes excuses. Paula's full of "wisdom". Simon loves grandmas. He thinks he hasn't shown he's a good singer.

Simon's mum's b-day's in november, he loves puppies, and randy loves dawgs. Don't ask.

9) Chris R. - "Geek in the Pink" by Jason Mraz. He dedicates it to his grandma. O. M. G. I mean, it wasn't perfect, not that close really, and he did lose steam for a bit. BUT I LOVED IT! The song choice, the performance, everything, for me, was awesome. Randy thought it was better than the original. Paula's crazy. Simon says it was the best tonight, by a mile. LOVE IT!

10) Sundance - "Mustang Sally" by Wilson Pickett. He dedicated it to his son, Levi. Meet Levi, the son of Sundance. HA! The song choice was great, the song is immensly fun, BUT, it doesn't show off your vocals. Not really. But it's a crowd pleaser. And that's exactly what it was. Fun, as heck, but not great. Randy thought he dropped the bomb, and that it was hot. Not. Paula's deaf. Simon thinks he can do better. LOL at baby Levi with Sundance beard! LOL!

The "droid" thing was funny-ish.

1. Chris R.
2. Blake
3. Chris S.
4. Jared
5. Sundance
6. AJ
7. Phil
8. Nick
9. Brandon
10. Sanjaya

2009-07-05T19:20:00.000+03:00

American Idol S06E13 - Top 24 Results

2009-07-05T08:46:00.003+03:00

Because THIS, is AMMMMMMMMMerican Idol! Oh, and 24... 20... Whatever...

The judges think a girl will win. Probably. WE learn about some of the mentors this season - Diana Ross, Jon Bon Jovi (YAY!), J Lo, Gwen Stefani, Tony Bennett, Martina McBride, Lulu andPeter Noone, Barry Gibb. Impressive. Then, it's the obligatory recap, of the guys and girls' performances.

GROUP SONG: ALREADY!?!?!? YAY!!!! "Sowing the Seeds of Love" by Tears for Fears. Well, it's hard to say anything about it with SO MANY people performing...

On to the results, and the guys are first. Nick's petrified, Chris S. loves Simon. Simon says he likes him. The back row joins Ryan on stage. Brandon's safe. Sundance's safe. Chris R.'s safe. Nick's safe. He's shocked. Blake's safe. Paul's all alone on the stage. He's outta here! He sings. Yes, he still is barefoot.

The girls are next. LaKisha's nervous. The back row join Ryan on stage. Jordin's safe. Stephanie's safe. Sabrina's safe. Leslie's safe. Melinda's safe. Antonella's the only one left on stage. She looks petrified. She's safe. She's shocked. Ryan's mean. He calls Amy on stage. And she's outta here! She sings. Sanjaya cries.

That American Idol Challenge SUCKS! And the question's easy. It's B, BTW.

Fantasia's in da house! She looks like crap. "Big News" for her, as she's about to star in The Color Purple. Quincy Jones' in the audience, and tries to talk about the play, but is cut. LOL! She sings "I'm Here". She sang with "SH" instead of S. "But they shtill mine". LOL. But, she's still one of the better contestants on Idol. Ever.

Again with the girls. The ones that have yet to meet Ryan on stage do so. Haley's safe. LaKisha's safe. Gina's safe. Nicole and Alaina are left. Alaina's safe. Nicole's outta here! She's had a lot of fun. She sings.

On to the guys. Again, the ones that weren't on estage are now on stage. Chris S.' safe. Phil's safe. Jared's safe. AJ's safe. Sanjaya and Rudy are left. One of 'em's in the top 4 guys, the other's out. Sanjaya's safe. Rudy's outta here!

We see the journeys of the ones that are outta here. They're not having a "Bad Day", but rather are going "Home" by Daughtry. Then Rudy sings us out.

Watchmen

2009-07-05T06:53:00.004+03:00

I saw the movie Watchmen the other day.

Again, a pretty wierd movie. It probably is down to my down right non-existent previous knowledge of the Minutemen and Watchmen and all of those things, though.

I liked the movie. Quite a lot. And i would like to say that Malin Akerman, and Carla Gugino (as the young Silk Spectre) are HOT! And the "porn" scene? HOT!

Also, kudos to the producers/editor/whomever for the awesome soundtrack - "The Times They Are A-Changin'", "99 Luftballons", Jimi Hendrix's version of "All Along the Watchtower", "Hallelujah", "The Sounds of Silence", a cover by My Chemical Romance of Dylan's "Desolation Row" and "First We Take Manhattan". NICE!

On a side note, Malin making out/sleeping with a glowing blue man was way gross.

American Idol S06E12 - Top 24: Top 12 Girls

2009-07-04T06:44:00.009+03:00

After the sucking that was the guys (serously, how bad did THEY suck?), I'm really crossing my fingers and hoping for a better showing from the girls.

We get a recap of last night's guys' performances. Then, after some banter, we see a recap of the girls' journeys to the Top 24.

1) Stephanie - "How Come U Don't Call Me Anymore?" by Prince. Her parents believe in her. And for good reason. She's good. Very good. And the performance was good. Very good. The last note was all over the lace. But it was really good. Randy thought it set it off. He thought it was pitchy, though. But he liked it. Paula's drunk. Simon thought she was a million times better than any of the guys. That should be enough to save her from the claws of the Death Spot. Trademark pending.

COCA COLA! Melinda thought the guys were awesome. Some other girls talked too.

2) Amy - "I Can't Make You Love Me" by Bonnie Raitt. This song needs to be put down. Like yesterday. I mean, how many times can you listen do THE SAME DAMN SONG??? And when they do medicore shitty versions, like this one, I seriously couldn't care less. Carrie's first audition, the VERY FIRST one, was MUCH better. Randy said it was kinda boring. Paula's comatose. Simon can't remember her. And she's got no personality when she sings.

3) Leslie - "(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman" by Aretha Franklin. I'm tired. And bored. And I couldn't care less if I tried. Kelly's version was about a gazillion times better. The performance part SUCKED! The singing was meh-inducing. Except for the last run. That SUCKED! Randy's struggling. He thought the song was too big for her. Paula's crazy. Simon says something long and complicated, that Ryan later explains meant he thought she was out of her comfort zone. And it's the return of the Dawgpound. I could be more excited. Really, I could.

4) Sabrina - "I Never Loved a Man (The Way I Love You)" by Aretha Franklin. She looks really bad. She reminds me of a classmate i used to have. She was BUTT UGLY, and fugly as hell. Sabrina can sing, though. And she does a VERY good job. There were some parts of it I hated. But that's not to say they weren't good. Randy called her the one to beat. Paula's high as a kite. Simon thought it was the best so far.

5) Antonella - "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" by Aerosmith. She's HOT! And gorgeous! Too bad she can't really sing. That really sucked. The arrangement was terrible. The phrasing was just plain wierd. And her "alterations" to the original lyrics were awful. At least she's hot! Randy thought it was really pitchy and bland. Paula's "supportive". Simon thought it didn't work. And he thinks the song is way too big for her. Is there ANYONE in the WHOLE singing world that THAT song's too big for???

COCA COLA! Jordin thinks her young age is an advantage. And a disadvantage.

6) Jordin - "Give Me One Reason" by Tracy Chapman. I kinda get what Simon was saying about the TOO sweet thing. The faces she made were exactly that. That being said, though, the performance was really good. The ending was great. Randy wants her to challenge herself. Paula's disturbing. Simon also wants her to push herself, and he thought it was good. LOL at Ryan "enlarging" himself.

7) Nicole - "Stay" by Chaka Khan. There was something not quite right with her performance. I can't quite put my finger on it. I guess it was good. I dunno. I'm puzzled. Randy thought it wasn't really working for him. It went right over his head. Paula's autistic. Simon thought it was indulgent and aggressive.

8) Haley - "It's All Coming Back to Me Now" by Celine Dion. WHY WOULD SHE SING CELINE??? Well, that was a waste of time. It really was nothing. I mean, it's like those filler tracks on albums. WHY??? Randy eventually says it was just OK for him. Paula's an imbecile. Simon thought she sounded 40. He also thought it was boring.

9) Melinda - "(Sweet Sweet Baby) Since You've Been Gone" by Aretha Franklin. WOW. This girl's good. More than good. Great. More than great. Awesome. I mean, that was terrific! And she's completely unpretentious. Randy says she blew it out the box. She's shocked. Paula's repetitive. Simon says she's fantastic.

COCA COLA! Alaina says she's perfect. Well, not really, but that's basically what she said.

10) Alaina - "Brass in Pocket" by the Pretenders. Wow, that sucked. To begin, the volume on her mic was too loud, the song sucked, and the performance was just terrible. Andcoming after the Doolittle, it just shows how crappy she is. Randy thought it was really, buh, I don't know. Seriously. Paula's numb. Simon said it wasn't special, and it was a mess. Simon claims Ryan wants to date her. I seriously don't know what to do with that.

11) Gina - "All By Myself" by Eric Carmen. Sounded shouty at some parts. But other than the volume, it was pretty good. Randy thought it was kinda nice. Paula's complmentary. Simon doesn't think she hit the big note. I kinda agree with Simon, but I think it's still better than what he gave her credit for.

12) LaKisha - "And I'm Telling You I'm Not Going" by Jennifer Holliday. GUTSY song choice, to say the least. TA-TAS! The arrangement was kinda strange, but the singing! DAMN! Brilliant. She even sort of performed it! The ending was FANTASTIC! Randy bows. He says she laid it out, among many YEAH's. Paula's proud. Simon says he's tempted to tell the rest of the Top 24 to just go home. It was great, but not quite THAT great.

1. LaKisha
2. Melinda
3. Jordin
4. Sabrina
5. Stephanie
6. Gina
7. Nicole
8. Haley
9. Amy
10. Leslie
11. Alaina
12. Antonella

American Idol S06E10 - Top 24: Top 12 Guys

2009-07-04T00:06:00.003+03:00

Finally, we get to the Top 24, and it's the guys' turn tonight!

We start with Ryan assuring us, for the 6th season in a row, that this is the most talented field ever. Then he blows his and the show's own trumpet. Not literally, though. That would have been disgusting. Then it's a recap of the guys' journeys to the top 24. The Rolling Stones ROCK. In just so mane ways, it's incredible.

1) Rudy - "Free Ride" by Edgar Winter Group. He's a self-proclaimed professional musician. And Simon doesn't like him. He's got some diction problems when singing. Either that, or no one told to to OVERenunciate when singing. The song is fun and all, but it's mainly down to the song choice, and not the singing. Randy thought it was really corny. "Any bar in America" I believe he said. Paula's an idiot. Simon thought he's not unique.

COCA COLA! Chris Sligh thinks all the guys look pretty. He's funny! LOL! Chris Richardson thinks they're all awesome. Brandon worked with Xtina, Timberlake, Usher et al.

2) Brandon - "Rock With You" by Michael Jackson. He's happy. I think. The "intimate" start was shiver-inducing. After we get over the initial discomfort, he does a very nice job. And the best news? 2 guys in, and still no ballads! Maybe this is the year they finally learn? Randy called it pitchy. Paula's useless. Simon called it safe and predictable. He thinks he's better than that.

3) Sundance - "Nights in White Satin" by the Moody Blues. It's being all down hill after his first audition, getting worse and worse with each passing performance. First ballad of the night. Well, you didn't really think THAT was going to last, right? God he sucks. Why did they put him through over that Tommy dude? The song SUCKED too. Just terrible. Randy thought he was pitchy all the way through. Paula's right. Did I actually write that just there? Simon called him very "dad in a wedding"-y. And flat. His tummy's very not flat, though.

Paula just rubbed her tits. It was oddly not attractive. Hmmm...

4) Paul - "Careless Whisper" by Wham!. He's always barefoot. I'm just groosed out. His smoke-y husky voice sounds REALLY forced. And, I could Care-less. HA! It really was very bad. The falsetto was just awful! Randy's back to saying the contestant's name three times. He thought it was very pitchy. He did like him calling him Mr. Jackson. Paula's hypocritical. Simon called it third rate. Ryan shows up shoe-less too. Ha! Solidarity, huh?

5) Chris R. - "I Don't Want to Be" by Gavin DeGraw. Both Bo and Elliott performed this song. But they did different arrangements. I really liked this performance. The stage presence and the movments were awkwrd, but in a good way, somehow. Randy thought he made it kinda work. He did mistake Gavin for Edwin McCain, though. So I don't know what to make of his comment. Paula's rude. Simon's negative. He thought the vocal was bad, and below standard.

6) Nick - "Now and Forever" by Richard Marx. The third ballad of the night's not as bad as the first two balladeers, but it's not great either. It's just there. Not great, not really bad. Randy thought it was really boring and very pitchy. And not good. Paula's drunk. Simon didn't thin kit was that bad. He says some other things. And he says he'll be there next week too.

7) Blake - "Somewhere Only We Know" by Keane. He holds the mic in an odd way. That's about the only bad thing about it. The song was great, the singing was VERY VERY good, it was just great. He ever refrained from beatboxing! And, for a ballad, it was anything BUT boring. Randy was shocked at the song selection, but he kinda dug it. Paula's maternal. Simon thinks he's contemporary. And he thinks it's the best tonight.

8) Sanjaya - "Knocks Me Off My Feet" by Stevie Wonder. They keep pushing the sob story that is his hot sis not making it through. "I don't want to bore you". HA! Talk about comedy! He was barely audible for most of the song, too. And, yeah, it was boring. Just blah. Randy didn't think it was very good. Paula's pedophile-y. Simon thought it was the most dreary performance yet.

9) Chris S. - "Typical" by Mute Math. In the Birmingham auditions, he and the rest of the hopefuls had to sing Sweet Home Alabama about 37 times, and he didn't like thesong to begin with, so if he hears it again he'll probably go postal. HA! He's so chubby! In a good way! He's really pretty good. Never heard that song before, but pretty good. Randy thought it's all good, and he's a Chris fan. He loved it, and thought it was the bomb. Paula's stupid. Simon's torn, because the singing felt student-gig-y. And he calls Ryan sweetheart. LOL. And Chris ris Simon a new one, saying just because he doesn't sing Il Divo or the Teletubbies, doesn't mean he can't sing. ROFLMAO! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Simon's pissed.

COCA COLA! Jared's a New Yorka, so he can handle the heat.

10) Jared - "Back at One" by Brian McKnight. We've never seen Jared before The Chair. But his "Cupid" was VERY good. He's got annoying and distracting hand gestures. I dunno. I guess it was a'ight. Randy thought it was pretty good, and ayight. Paula's moronic. Simon called it unadventurous And nasally.

11) AJ - "Never Too Much" by Luther Vandross. He's DESPERATE. Was the Idol experience, for him, orgasmic? moronic? boring? tree? HUH??? Keep on keepin' on? How lame s that quote? Well, at least he didn't sing a ballad. Paula was dancing. Simon was preplexed. It was aight. Randy thought it was vocally good, he can definitely blow, but didn't bring anything new to it. Paula's observant. Simon thought it was good. Not great, not terrible. And kind of a theme park performance. And predictable.

12) Phil - "I Could Not Ask For More" by Edwin McCain. Phil's a Sailor/Navy dude! And a bad dad. Clay did it. Clay was better. Phil wasn't bad. But he wasn't Clay. He was just good. Not great. Not Clay. Clay was great. Phil wasn't. Randy thought it was the best vocal of the night. HUH??? Paula's grooving. Not really. Simon thought it was OK.

1. Blake
2. Chris S.
3. Chris R.
4. Brandon
5. Phil
6. Jared
7. AJ
8. Nick
9. Rudy
10. Sanjaya
11. Paul
12. Sundance

Knowing - HUH???

2009-07-04T00:03:00.003+03:00

So, I saw that Knowing movie the other day, and all I can say is - HUH???

I mean, WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT???? I thought movies were supposed to make sense. Was I wrong?

It begins with a pretty nice storyline, but then just goes from bad to worse. And don't even get me started about the whole he's-not-talking-to-his-father thing. Or that terrible it's-just-like-they're-in-the-garden-of-eden anding bullshit. I mean, COME ON!

Just terrible. Seriously, terrible. And beware the whisper people!

And on an annoyed side note - what's with the sado-maso? I mean, the director/producer/editor/whatever must have had a HYOOGE pain fetish. Otherwise, how can you explan the numerous shots of people burning, people exploding, animals burning (ANIMALS!!!), and people being crushed to death by a subway train? HUH???

American Idol S06E10 - The Chair

2009-07-03T12:49:00.003+03:00

You know the drill - The Elevator, The Walk, The Chair, The Decision.

Sanjaya's first. His last song was good. He's through. And doesn't quite know what to do. Anna's tall. And loud. She's not through. She's shocked. Bernard (who?) is not through. Eric (who?) and Tami are out too. Melinda ALWAYS looks terrified. Her last song was great. And she's through. She's shocked. Brandon's the other backup singer. His last song was good, as well. And he's through.

Gina's the one that was cut in Hollywood week last season. Her last song was good. She's not cut this time. She's through. She's shocked. Jimmy and Errick (WHO???) are out. Haley's next. Her first song in Hollywood wasn't great. She's through. Phil's the bad dad. His last song was good. The clothes SUCKED. But the singing was good. He's through.

The Simpsons Movie (that is AWESOME) is shamelessly plugged, as the top 40 (?) are getting a sneak preview of it. I think. Chris' FUNNY! LOL! "You guys are probably wondering why I called this meeting today...". LOL! His last song was very good. He's through. Blake's the beatboxer. We see that great group performance again. Or part of it. He's through. Thomas' also in that group, but he's out. Rudy (who?) is the last member of that group. His first song in Hollywood wasn't that good. He's through.

People are nervous. Paul's cool, calm and collected. He says he'll always be barefoot. That's already old. He's got filthy underwear too. Gross. His last song wasn't really good. Jordin's last song was good. And she's through. Olivia (who?), Tatiana and Monique are out. AJ (who?) is desperate. His last song wasn't bad. He's through. Stephanie (who?) had a good last song. She's through. Leslie (who?) also had a good-ish last song. And she too is through. Nick quit last year in Hollywood. His last song was good. He's through. And is overwhelmed.

Alaina cries ALL THE TIME. She's nervous. Her last song was good-ish. She effed the lyrics. She's through. Chris' first song was good. He's through. Sabrina (who???) had a good last song. She's through. Jerome (who?) is out. Joelle (who?) is out. Matt the cowboy's out. Princess (who?) is out. LaKisha's selling her sob story, that she's got a girl. Her last song was great. Even if she loked like a grandma. She's through.

Nicole (who?) is next. Her last song was good. She's through. Jared (WHO???) had a very good last song. He's through. Amy (WHO????) is next. Her last song was good too. She's through. Down to the last 2 guys and 2 girls. Antonella and Marisa are the last girls. Marisa's first song in Hollywierd was good. Antonella's last song wsa a mess of forgotten words. Antonella's through. Marisa's out. She's about to throw up. Marisa's crying. She curses. Sundance and Tommy have "fun" in the elevator. Sundance is red. He's through. Tommy's out. He gets pissed in the elevator.

The Top 12 Girls: Antonella Barba, Haley Scarnato, LaKisha Jones, Jordin Sparks, Stephanie Edwards, Melinda Doolittle, Alaina Alexander, Gina Glocksen, Amy Krebs, Leslie Hunt, Sabrina Sloan and Nicole Tranquilo.

The Top 12 Guys: Phil Stacy, Jared Cotter, Chris Richardson, Nick Pedro, Brandon Rogers, Sundance Head, Rudy Cardenas, AJ Tabaldo, Paul Kim, Chris Sligh, Blake Lewis, Sanjaya Malakar.

Raul Albiol! 18! Raul Albiol!

2009-07-03T11:40:00.003+03:00

Well, after Kaka's HYOOOGE presentation, comes Raul Albiol's.

Sure, it wasn't the 50+ thousands that cam to see Kaka, but still, 8,000 or so is not a bad number, considering most stadium in Israel can't even hold that much.

The Spanish central defender chose the number 18, that used to belong to Ruben de la Red (and Faubert, but I really don't want to talk about him). Ruben's a good friend of Raul Albiol, who promised to keep that number safe until Ruben's expected return to the football field.

For those of you who don't know, Ruben, who was a huge promise, and one of the best potentials ever to come out of Real's youth system, passed out, 11 minutes into a cup game against Real Union last season. He has been out of action since, and has done more than enough medical exams and tests, to try and figure the cause of what happened to him. Unfortunately, no cause was found, yet, and Ruben will not be able to play football this up coming season. We all cross our fingers and hope and pray that he will be healthy, first and foremost, and if possible that he will return to play for Real, as soon as possible.

Back to the good news, and the next player to be presented should be Cristiano Ronaldo, if I remember correctly, and that will happen in 3 days' time.

American Idol S06E09 - Hollywood Week

2009-07-03T11:14:00.003+03:00

In just one hour, we get all the tension/drama/excitment that is Hell Week (trademark pending). Seriously???

Day 1, and only the girls are performing, and there are 2 twice as many as the boys. Ryan explains how this day, and the next, will work. Jory, who's canadian's first. I'm unipressed. Next's Geri, Kelly, Lisa, Christen and Jeromishia. I kid you not, her name really is Jeromishia. None are more than ok. And they are all outta here! Shocker!

Perla's annoying. Like Gedeon last season. I hated him. I hate her. She does the same song she did in her audition. That sucks. Rachel's the one that talked to her hubby's picture. and she's alright. Rachel's outta here. Perla moves on. Simon rips at Perla. Rachel's depressed. Perla's depressed, too. Baylie's HOT! She's good. But what's up with the mediocrity overall? Ashlyn's out. Porcelana's out. Sarah's out. So are some others. Nicole's having problems with choosing a song. And she sucks. And she's out. And she blames the song. And the judges assure her mom it wasn't the song. HA! Simon's over this. They keep telling her it's not the song. And she keeps saying "the delivery of the song" bla bla bla. SHUT UP! Melinda, Jordin, Gina, Tatiana, Jamie Lin and others are through.

Day 2, and it's the guys' turn to face the judges. Brian's 19. Did you know he was 19? He is 19, just so you know. BTW, he's 19. What's with them recycling songs? Do something new, darn it! He's good. Jarrod's the Navy guy. He's a'ight. Matt's the one whose parents didn't support him. He's disticntly average. The Jarrod's out, Matt and Chris Sligh're through. 34 guys are through in total, amongst them are Blake the beatboxer, Nick that quit, bad dad Phil, and Jesus. I mean Castro. I mean Sean.

Group performances! YAY! Some drama ensues. I couldn't care less. Even if I tried, really, really hard. I will say however that Baylie and Antonella "not going to sleep", TOGETHER, is REALLY HOT! And that Amanda's a BEOTCH!

Simon warns everyone not to forget the words. HA! Some people forget the words. Well, DUH! Some more drama. Gina and Perla's group sing. Marisa is somewhat hot. Perla sucks. and she's out. The Chris/Rudy/Tom/Blake group performance was one of the better ones. EVER. And they are all through. L'Paige mumbles. Robyn's average. Sundace's just alright. He's loud. And red. And through. Antonella's alright. Baylie barely sings anything. Amanda forgets the words. But she's a bitch. Baylie's out. BUT SHE'S HOT! And Amanda thinks she's good. RIGHT. 36 people in all are going home, including Jesus/Osama/Fidel!

In room 1, Chris, Gina, Blake, Matt, Melinda, Paul and Haley and others. They're through. In room 2, Tami, LaKisha, Sundance and others, and they're through. Jordin's there. Room 3, with the Indian sister and Jamie Lin, is out. Sanjaya's REALLY sad. Next is The Chair (trademark pending, too).

American Idol S06E08 - The Best of the Rest Auditions

2009-07-03T09:49:00.002+03:00

Some more people that will suck. Some more people that will rock. What's not to like?

Lessons! Woohoo! Lesson 1 - The Look. Some people look like CRAP! Christa's crazy. And she wears all kinds of fabrics, on all kind of places. Wierd. LOL! "Today you felt like the inside of a dustbin?". LOL! She, obviously, SUCKS. And she begs a little. And cries. And begs. But she's still not through. Tami's a paddy cab driver. WOW. She's SO lesbian. And she sing "Whipping Post". HA! She changes the lyrics, so as to not appear totaly lesbian. That version SUCKED, but she can sing. And she's through.

Lesson 2 - Seek Inspiration. Some people are inspired by former Idols. Others by some other singers. Paul Kim was inspired by the Hung. He wants to prove Asians really can sing. LOL! Awesome! He's a pool-boy. He can sing. The husky voice is distracting. And he's through. Jack's inspiration's Bo's "In a Dream". He SUCKS. And he sings about opening his eyes. With his eyes closed. Simon called him deluded. LOL. Lesson 3 - Don't Give Up. Somepeople audition after being rejected before. We saw one of the cowboys from last season. Gina was the dental assistant from last season who's in love with Simon. She's still good. Simon says she's got a good taste. She wants to hug him. And again, she's through. And she does hug him. LOL!

Some people love Simon. Some people hate Randy. A LOT of people love Paula. Edward's a crazy Paula fan. He's there to see her. He gets to hug her. Awww... He sucks, though. As long as he's happy. Some people work in different jobs. And we see what some of last year's finalists did before going on Idol. Lesson 4 - Audition On Your Own. 3 rollerskating waitresses, a la Kellie Pickler, are auditioning together. Heather's first. She's alright. Ashley's next. She's got a ton of make up on. She's alright. Ebony's next. And she's better. Marginally. Heather's not through. Paula tells Ashley she shouldn't wear that much make up. She disses her for being old. HA! She's through. Ebony's through too.

We are reminded of the sucky singles of the Idol winners. We get to hear some orginals in some auditions. Faithon SUCKS. Melissa SUCKS. Brandon's beatboxing's good. But it SUCKED. Wes' spooky. He SUCKS. And the hand gestures. Ugh. And the stomping. Ugh. Simon's confused. Lesson 5 - Shake Your Moneymaker? People dance. Poorly. Except for Matt Buckstein (he was on last season). He doesn't dance. And we see Alex. Whose dancing SUCKS. And he SUCKS. Weren't we promised some good auditions??? Simon's less than impressed. He's outta here! And he gets to hug Paula. And he shakes Randy's hand. Simon couldn't care less.

Lesson 6 - Clarity. And we get to guess what they are singing! Yay! I wouldn't have guessed the first. Or the second. Or the third. LaKisha's got a tiny baby girl. Whose 3 yr old. And she's awesome! And she's through. And she cries hugging her daughter. Awww...

I refuse to comment on the waste of time that was the recap of the auditions. WE JUST SAW THAT!!! But, next, it's Hell Week! Hollywood, here we come! 172 people will be there, only to be brutally cut down to just 24! Ha! This is going to be awesome! Was that Marlea? The first one ever to quit? Back in season 4? Huh???

American Idol S06E07 - San Antonio Auditions

2009-07-03T08:29:00.003+03:00

Remember the Alamo? It was a long time ago. I'm not sure we would like to remember THIS Alamo...

SAN ANTONIO -

People came from all over the country. Simon's jet lagged. This first contestant's all about the HARD rock. Billy Idol? Seriously? Bryan SUCKS. And he banged his knees on the floor. OUCH. And he screams. He doesn't feel pain, apparently. Haley's a wedding band-er. Or formerly. Something. She shopped in a hoochie mama's shop. Or something. She sings the often sung "I Can't Make You Love Me" (Carrie's audition, Constance, plenty of others). She's good. She's through.

Jasmine's ready. I guess. The judges laugh. For no reason. Then she starts singing. Now they've got a reason to laugh. She sucks. And Randy and Simon do laugh. Jasmine looks pissed. And she ripps on Randy for not doing anything. LOL. Her mom says Simon needs to go back to "French". Or "British". LOL. Baylie's HOT! REALLY HOT! She's scared their horses will eat her. LOL. She's all about the fashion. She's NOT a country girl. She's good. And HOT! Simon calls her commercial with a capital C. SPOT ON. She's through. And the judges liked her name. LOL.

We are introduced to the doors to the auditions room. And a "horror/action/western/whatever" film, about people trying to open the right door. LOL! "AH, Push it!". LOL. Akron and William are cousins. LOL. Bruce and the Hulk. LOL. Violins. LOL. Hulk's first. He sucks. But he knows that. And he stages a fight with the judges, for the cameras. LOL! Bruce's next. And Akron's good. It's where LeBron's from! LOL... He's good. The second song was much better. And he's through.

LaRisa SUCKS. Deborah sucks. Sandie puts one finger in her right ear. I plugged both. She SUCKS! And she cries after Simon thought if it was serious. Awww. Ashlyn was beaten up in high school because she has a good voice. HUH??? Simon looks preplexed. She can sorta sing. Randy looks puzzled. They are put off by her facial expressions. They pass. Simon says he would have said yes. She cries. Simon thinks they made a mistake. So, of course, they bring her back in.

After the break, Ashlyn's back in the audition room. She still makes those faces. The other two, aka Paula and Randy change their minds, and she's through! I'm sure Simon did absolutely NOTHING to make/force them to do that. Jacob, nicknamed Jake the Snake, is next. He can't dance. He's influenced by Axl Rose and Kurt Cobain. Right. He sucks. And he goes berserk after he goes out. Well, not really, but you know. But he likes Ryan.

Jimmy sings the great song "Cupid". And, despite some wierd hand gestures, he's really good. Simon calls him a little fun Ruben. HUH??? He's through. Simon kept calling him Jimbo. LOL. And his little girl (?) doesn't know what to make of it. 22 total are through from Texas. Next, it's the rest of the rest show! Woohoo...

American Idol S06E06 - Los Angeles Auditions

2009-07-03T06:29:00.003+03:00

LA! Woohoo! If people go through from LA, are they "going to" Hollywood, or are they "staying in" Hollywood? Huh? HUH??? HUH!?!!?!?!?

LOS ANGELES -

Kat! "Over the Rainbow"! Woohoo! Olivia Newton-John's going to guest judge in tonight's episode. Martik's crazy. Like, seriously, he lost his mind. He needs help. He, aside from being a tiger, believes he's the most entertaining person on the planet earth. He REALLY is crazy. And he took his shirt off. Of course. LOL at the cartoon noises. And he's got a "mic". WOW. He SUCKS, beyond any level humanly comprehensible. Hollywierd is right. Sholandric's name SUCKS. He wants to bring the romance andlove back into the music. RIGHT. He too is delusional. And he SUCKS, bit hairy kitty kat balls.

Angela sucks. Grace sucks. LOL at her outfit. Sophat SUCKS. His name does too. Marianna's desperate. She was wailing out of her mom's womb. And she sucks. Really, really bad. And she begs. Still begging. Still begging. Yep, still begging. That's right, she's still begging. And she keeps saying she's on her knees. WOW. She SUCKS. And she pushes her mom into the room. She still begs. Her mom begs too. WOW. Desperate, with a humongous capital D. WOW. Simon and Randy thought her mom was hot. Some people beg. Alaina's "life story" is one of a moron. But she's good a good voice, and can sing. "Feeling Good"'s NOT by the Buble, though.

Again, we are reminded Taylor won. And Phuong's his soul sistah. but it is SO fake. And she's excited about Taylor's PICTURE. WOW. And she SUCKS. And she can't dance. She REALLY SUCKS. She's REALLY obsessed with Taylor. And she was "nervous". She sucks. Brandon's a backup singer. He knows and sang backup for some big BIG names. So he's GOT to be good, right? RIGHT! He's very, VERY good. Simon says he and Brandon share the likeability factor. LOL. And he's through.

Brian already got to Hollywood, where he was shot down. He's here to bring it. And he's loud. But he's good. And through. Even though Simon couldn't remember him. Sherman's 64. His wife passed away. He does this for her. Awww... And they are going to let him sing. He's not bad. Paula's crying. He's never going through, but it was very nice of him. And he hugs/shakes everyone's hand. And he feels like a winner. Awww... 21 are through on day 1.

Darold and Cavett are dating, and are both auditioning. They met at THE bus stop. Cavett's STUPID. She likes to go by the name "Sparkles". And she SUCKS. And she completely flirts with Simon. Her boyfriend SUCKS. "please go away" is right. LOL! "Depends what kind of music we're listening to". LOL... MAKE THEM STOP KISSING! PLEASE!

Anthony SUCKS. But he's a good sport. Eric's been training for 2 years. If you really have to do that, you're probably not good enough. And he talks in wierd "sientific" terms. He SUCKS. LOL! He learned from the Paula and Randy DVD! LOL! Simon tries to get him back, Randy and Paula try to prevent it. LOL! In day 2, 19 went through, for a total of, A LOT. Relatively. Next, San Antoin!

American Idol S06E05 - Birmingham Auditions

2009-07-03T05:32:00.004+03:00

Birmingham, AL! Home of the Ruuuuuuuuben, Bo and Taylor.

BIRMINGHAM -

Erica's first, and her southern accent is NOT cute, unlike Kellie's, or any other Idol finalist, EVER. She says Unchained Melody's by LeAnn Rimes. Stupid, stupid, stupid. She's not really good. It was actually painful. They tell her not to sing another one. She does. They scream. She keeps singing. Paula's astonished. She SUCKS. And not through. Some people cry for not making i tthrough. Katie's got a baby voice. It is REALLY annoying. I SERIOUSLY hope she sucks. Damn. She doesn't. But her singing voice is REALLY strange too. But she's good. Simon looks pissed, and REALLY hopes she doesn't get through. And she's through.

Tatiana's 17. She's good. And through. Siana's scary. And fat. And i don't now where her chest ends and her stomach starts. And she sucks.

Bernarnd's ok. Not special. He's through. Margaret's NOT 26. More like 50. And she's crazy. And she's Big Bird-like. I'm scared. LOL! When she tells the judges she's "26", Simon says he's 9, Paula's 11 and Randy's 10. Ha! And she SUCKS. LOL at Randy and Paula "digging" it. Simon looks puzzled. She's NOT 33. She IS 50.

Some people go through. Jamie Lee's HOT! She's got a "sad story". Her dad's paralyzed. Why is that, you ask? HE SHOT HIMSELF! AND, HE SHOT HIS EX! FOR CHEATING ON HIM! HE CAUGHT HER IN THE ACT! AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! She's not great. But she's alright. And she's through. Chris Sligh's a funny dude! LOL! Xtina! HA! His interview bit was FUNNY! LOL! And he wants to make the Hasselhoff cry. LOL! ROFL! LMAO! And he's great! LOL! 16 from day 1 are through.

Paula's not with us today. Yay! Victoria's hair is 6 FEET LONG! WOW! Spooky... She's a "nice" person. They want to meet her mom, with the SLIGHTly shorter hair. Victoria doesn't suck, but she's not good, either. And she's not through. Lakia's name SUCKS. And she can't talk properly. And she SUCKS. It hurts. We see people being nice, despite their dreams being shattered. That's nice of them.

Some familys support some people. Team Nichole? Huh? Seriously? And Nichole cries. Almost. She's ok. Pretty good. Simon looks bored. The judges don't think she's ready. And she's outta here! Simon and Randy are "exhausted". And then came Brandy. She's crazy. Delusional. Stuid. Moronic. Idiotic. And she doesn't wear a bra. WHY OH WHY??? She SUCKS, big, hairy virgin balls. She thinks the floor's to blame. Maybe the carpet's to blame too. And she gets pissed. And she talks back. She needs to take some grammar lessons. She SERIOUSLY thinks she rocks. And she curses. That was amusing, her whole ranting as Simon and Randy go out, and then back in. "Sweet Home Alabama"! THAT SONG ROCKS! Next, LA! Hollywood!

American Idol S06E04 - New York Auditions

2009-07-02T12:33:00.002+03:00

New York! The Big Apple! Suckiness ensues!

NEW YORK -

Carole Bayer Sager joins the judges panel for these auditions. Ian was on "So You Think You Can Dance?" season 2. And he got pissed after not going through. And he's cocky. And he's gay. "Benardo"? Not Bernardo, Benardo? He's dilusional. He's got 2 theraists. And each of them's got a couple too, I'm sure. He SUCKS. REALLY bad. And he gets pissed at Simon. And he gets escorted out. LOL. And he calls Simon a do-do bird. WOW. Sarah's cute. And she lied to her parents about going to audition. :0. And she cries. And she's good. Stupid song choice. But she's good. And she's through. She cries. And she's forced to call her dad. Her dad's not mad, he's intrigued. LOL.

Fania's greek. She can't dance. And she's retarded. And she's ugly. And she sucks. And she can't dance. Or sing. She sucks. She's fugly as heck. Ashanti's desperate. She got to Hollywood twice, but never made it to TV. And I don't understand how she's made it that far, and twice no less! She sucks. She's desperate. REALLY desperate. And she begs for ANYTHING good. And she's overly dramatic, as is proved by Ryan's little intro and the melodramatic music. GOD, I hate her... Even after that hour long speech, she sucks. And she's outta here. JUST GET OUT! STOP IT! SHUT UP! ARGH!!! AAAHHH!!!

Some people fall asleep, are awakened by someone with the camera close up, and are scared. LOL. Amanda and Antonella are BFF. Antonella's HOT! Amanda's not. They're annoying, together. Amanda's first, and they bring Antonella in too. And they're oh so nice to each other! And they sing a duet. That WAS a mess. Alone, Amanda's better, but still not all that. But she's good. Simon coudn't care less, but says yes. And she's through. Antonella's next. And she's better. And HOTTER! She's good. Did I mention she's HOT!? And she's through.

Someone plays harmonica. His name is Clifton. SERIOUSLY??? He likes to make people scream. And he sucks. And then he goes in the room. Simon cracks up at him. And then he sucks. He sings ZZ Top. SERIOUSLY??? He stomps. He SUCKS. And I LOVE that song! And he ruined it! He plays harmonica next. F-150? HUH? Phillip SUCKS. Someone in an astronaut suit? HUH? Josh's got green hair. William's unsure about his sex(uality). Kia? THAT'S A CAR!!!!!!!!!!! ARGH!!!!!!!!!!! She's good. She ALWAYS agrees with Simon on the show. And she cries. And she's through.

Simon's not here, at least to start things off. Jenry's a WIERD spelling for Henry. He's good. Paula's hot for him. Carole FREAKS ME OUT! He's through. Nakia's CRAZY. She's not terrible. Not good. Not terrible. There's some wierd side-effect sort of sound to her voice. Either that or I'm hearing things. She's outta here. She's crying, and begging. And she doesn't know what being off-pitch means. The "lot of people" rooting for her is one girl. Sarah's crazy, too. And she SUCKS. She doesn't think she can sing, admits she's not a singer, but she still wants to be the American Idol, even though she can't sing. She's CRAZY!!!! Randy's speechless. And she keeps talking. And talking. And talking. Ugh. And then she screams, after getting out. And it was funny!

Simon decided to show up. Antonio SUCKS. And he's 47??? HUH??? Jory's a Canadian, and she's wearing a wheel rim plate sort of thing. The one you get in cheaper cars, that comes off easily. You know what i mean... And she can sing. And she's through. Porcelana's militant. RIGHT. She did get quite hot, though. And she can sing. And she's through. She's amazed. And hugs everyone. Sans Simon.

We get a FUCKED UP names montage. LOL. Christopher's COCKY! And he's somewhat similar to Simon. Looks wise. Not really, but kinda. He sings KELLY!?!?!?!? HE SUCKS!!!! And he sounds like a chick. What's with chicks sounding like dudes, and vice versa??? Simon looked pained. Paula and Simon "fight". Rachel's got a "special" look. She can sing. Wierd song choice, but she can sing. Simon's confused with which Rachel's the real Rachel. But she's through.

We get a montage of "All Night Long (All Night)". That sucked. Chris' from VA. And he's good. Too many runs. But he's good. Paula's hot for him. Simon thinks he can surprise them in the next rounds. And he's through.

Some people SUCK. Nick quit in Hollywood last season, after forgetting the lyrics. He's good. And through.

Isadora's name SUCKS. She sucks. She's delusional. She moans. She doesn't sing, she moans and grunts. SHE SUCKS!!! UGH!!! ARGH!!! And again with the damn bracelets! ARGH!!! Next we go to the hometown of Ruben, Bo AND Taylor!

American Idol S06E03 - Memphis Auditions

2009-07-02T11:43:00.002+03:00

Just an hour long episode today. YAY!

MEMPHIS -

Home of Elvis! And, why not, Elvis impersonators. Of course. 20? 30 doughnuts? LOL. The first dude cheers. And he's got a whole cheer squad behind him. MAN, they're annoying. Frank's his name. Too theatrical and over the top. But he can sing. Simon called it over the top, corny, cabaret. He tries, futilly, to change his mind. They're nice to him, but he's not through. And they cheer outside. And they lift Ryan. LOL. And they're annoying. And Simon's annoyed. "Uh, not being rude, but can you shut up?". LOL. And Ryan cursed! HA!

Timika's BORING. She looks like shit, too. Hmmm. Hmmm. Hmmm. She can't speak properly. And she SUCKS. And incomprehensible. She SUCKS! Big, black (?), Mya balls. She asks to sing another song. Simon says it's pointless. She asks again. And then just sings. She SUCKS. Chris' COCKY. And he sucks. And he sounds like the Taylor look-a-lik from the last episode. Alexis' another African-American girl that no one can possibly understand. She sucks. And the bracelets. ARGH! Sundance? SUNDANCE??? WTF??? His dad's Roy Head, who had a number 1 song being knocked off by the Beatles' "Yesterday". WOW. Does anyone think that beards like that are appealing, IN ANY WAY? He can REALLY sing. The judges're blown away. And he's through. Simon's making a bold, or maybe not so much, prediction. And he said he blew Taylor out the park. WOW. Someone's hating on the Soul Patrol!

Wandera SUCKS. Well, not really. But she's not really good in any way. She's outta here. Simon calls her babe. She gets pissed and throws a tantrum. Some people don't get through. Travis loves EVERYONE! He said emotion(al) about 50 times. The song SUCKED! And hescked too. Danielle is sorta good. She's already got TERRIBLE hand gestures. She's through.

Some people love Paula. Topher thinks Paula's hot. His wife has been cheating him. And they broke up recently. Simon, being his usual thoughtful self, asks Topher why his wife left him. Topher says something along the lines of "...cause she's a bitch...". LOL. He sucks. He's not through, OBVIOUSLY. But he's happy he cursed his ex on national TV. Cleavage Alert! AAAHHH!!! MY EYES!!! Janita SUCKS!!!!!!! Sean looks like Osama Bin-Laden/Jesus/Castro/a homeless. Take your pick. He's even got the only one message that could actually fit all four: "We are all poor, inside. We are all homeless". Deep. And he sings about God. Of course he did. And he's good! And he's through! And Randy says, and again, I quote: "It don't matter how you look, dude, you can blow!". SERIOUSLY???

Melinda's a professional backup singer. And she's cute, in a non-sexual way. And she's BRILLIANT! She's shocked they tell her she's awesome. CUTE! ADORABLE! And she's through. Well, DUH! Elvis! Yeah, not really. Robert's delusional. And he's quite incomprehensible. And dumb. And yeah, you guessed it, he sucks, too. He's shocked that they tell him he sucks. we see some people "dance" to and "sing" "Burning Love". Terrible. Did her REALLY pull a towel from his pants' zipper? REALLY???

Phil missed the birth of his 3rd baby. BAD DAD! That "last thing she wants to hear" thing was funny! And he's not half bad. Not great, but not bad! Pretty good, actually. The judges "fight". He's through. 23 total go through. And we see a video of the Idol baby of the bald dude. Nest stop - NYC!

American Idol S06E02 - Seattle Auditions

2009-07-02T06:41:00.003+03:00

Seattle! Woohoo! This is going to SUCK! It was wet. And rainy.

SEATTLE -

Jimi Hendrix ROCKS! Brandon's another one of those Apollo Creed like things. HE's the one that MURDERED the Sheriff last season? GOD he sucks. LOL! UNDERcover. He still SUCKS. LOL at Paula's next season comment. Ha! Jennifer's as ugly a "girl" as I've EVER seen. Hotness? She doesn't get sarcasm, does she? She SUCKS. She's an IDIOT. And she keep singing, even though Simon and the others are screaming at her. She curses.

Simon says no to a lot of people. Amy's NOT 23. I don't care what she says. She gonna "try" and sing. She failed. She sucks. LOL! Lie in a bath... LOL! Simon screams at her. LOL. Some people suck. Darwin's a girl. SERIOUSLY. Even though she doesn't really look like one. And she's boring as FUCK. And she thinks she's all that and then some. I am seriously freaked out by her. And her mom, who looks like her twin. She's got about a ton of lipstick on. Her mom's REALLY boring too. I am SERIOUSLY FREAKED OUT. I need to rinse my eyes with soap after that audition. Simon's not being rude, so all is well in the world. I am SERIOUSLY FREAKED OUT! AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It rains. Again. Or still.I'm not sure. Some people don't get through. Tommy's got a fro. And he's cocky as SHIT! He already auditioned twice, and FAILED. Now his name's Thomas. And he's good. And he's through. And as he celebrates with his family, Ryan gets stuck with the tiny dog. LOL! And Simon LUV's the dog! Melissa, that goes by Carlene, is a BIT overweight, and she should NEVER dress herself. NEVER. EVER. Simon looks shocked. And Randy gives her a running start to "Baby Got Back", and she takes the reins, and lets it rip. LOL. She SUCKS. On her audition song, not Sir Mix-A-Lot's. The dog outside looks worried. And after she leaves, Simon keeps talking about her "net" clothes.

A ton of girls fix their hair. Blake doesn't need to. He's a beatboxer. He's the champion here. He beatboxes, and Simon's not impressed. His song choice SUCKED, but he can sing. Simon doesn't think he's as good as he thinks he is. He's through. His dad's proud and crying.

Some people suck. David looks like JPL's long lost GEEK brother. He SUCKS. The Malakars girl, whose name is too tough to spell, is cute! And her brother looks like MY brother! Only Indian! LOL! The cute one's first, and she's good! She's through. And Simon called the other 2 Squidly and Diddly. LOL. And the cute one said she would have been shocked if Simon jumped out of his chair. LOL! Sanjaya's next. He thinks his sister's better. And he's good too! Paula's high. Simon thinks he's a LOT better than his sis. And he's through too! And he doesn't want to say who the judges say was better, and his sister looks PISSED!

Nick Zitzmann is a shame, for all Jewish people out there. I think he's Jewish. With a name likethat, you can't assume otherwise. And he SUCKS. and he hasn't even gotten in the room yet! He's as dorky as they come.He's a leader, and that makes him the next American Idol. He's DULL. He SUCKS. Like, on Keith levels. SERIOUSLY. His look is fixated on a spot about a foot over the judges' heads. HE SUCKS! AND THEY DON'T STOP HIM! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Simon said it was almost non-human. I would have just left after that. But he had to listen to the dawg first! Simon's still shocked. And when he goes out and "talks" with Ryan, we learn that Ryan can actually be funny! Almost no one is through! Will Rudy change it? He's Venezuelan. He sings Journey, FOR Randy. But wasn't Paula in Journey? OH, RIGHT! It was Randy! He's good. And Simon says no. Paula says yes. Randy DOES love the song. And he says yes too. And he's through. "Bad Day"'s here agan! Some people talk back to Simon. LOL at him giving the finger. LOL. Will day 2 be any better? Ryan says, and i quote, "Hell no!". Shit...

It's sunny, at least for a while. Kenneth and Johnathan are the wierder incarnation of Adam and Dirk. Kenneth's first. He says he's been compared to Timberlake, Lance (?), and some boy bands. He SUCKS. So maybe these two are the suckier version of Adam and Dirk? It's going to be tough, but I really think they can do it! Simon says he looks like a bushbaby. LOL! He's outta here. I hope they don't bring him back to the finale. As he's talking with Ryan, the judges laugh their asses off about the bushbaby. LOL! Jonathan looks like a nice guy. He SUCKS, but he looks like a nice guy. He really sucks. But he's nice. And so chubby! Well, at least they have each other!

Some people SUCK. It's painful. Eric is the first ever Taylor Hicks look-a-like/impersonator. He's a hair dresser. He's stupid. And quite boring. LOL! "Yeah, you know, I try to shower, and stuff, this morning...". LOL. He SUCKS. LOL... "Age: 28 ???". Simon doesn't think he's serious. He tries to cut Simon's hair. Security jumps him. LOL. Some people tell Ryan he's short. Anna's REALLY tall. 6' 4"! Or is it 6" 4'? She's SO much taller than Ryan! LOL! She's gonna move around. Damn. But she can sorta sing. She does have one of the better schticks. Ever. Something's gotten over Paula and Randy. They make wierd growling noises as Simon's trying to make a point. He just gives up, and stops caring for the moment. LOL. She's through, BTW. LOL! "You just put through a giraffe". LOL!

Jordin's got a strange name. She's 16 and her mom says she's singing her WHOLE life! And she's good! Real good! Simon mumbled something about her being one of the best, I think, while she was still singing. Her dad's Phillippi Sparks! Simon's got no clue who that is! LOL! And she's through. Just 8 from day 2 move on. We get a craptacular montage of "Don't Cha".

Steven Thone. Big Red. REALLY??? X-Files music in the background and all... I AM SCARED... REALLY, REALLY SCARED. He thinks he's as good as Freddie Mercurey. Right... And to prove it, he's gonna sing Bohemian Rhapsody. THE WHOLE THING. And he sounds like a baby girl. LOL! HE SUCKS!!!! ROFLMAO! They all laugh. Big Red starts cursing. And tells Simon to bring it on. He doesn't make sense. I am all spooked. THAT'S IT! FINALLY! Next, Memphis, TN!

American Idol S06E01 - Minneapolis Auditions

2009-07-02T00:58:00.005+03:00

Another season of the Idol's upon us! And we start, where else, but in the long and arduous auditions process. First stop - Minneapolis, MN!

First is the obligatory "And the winner is..." of last season. Like we didn't see it. And then it's the obligatory "This really does work" thing. "Baba O'Riley"! Great song!

MINNEAPOLIS -

And a reminder that the one that used to go by the name Prince performed in the finale last season. That, they tell us, is the reason we start in the MN, in his hometown. Right... Randy drops a name. IN HIS FIRST SENTENCE OF THE SEASON! And Jewel is going to be a guest judge. How did she get to a name like Jewel?

Jessica's "Jewel's biggest fan". And she's a make-up artist. And she wants to inspire people. And she cries. And she takes a while to get started. And she sucks. Big bling-bling family "Jewel"s. Ha! Randy: "No, no, no, no, no, no, no". She's shocked. She cries.

Troy's got no sense of style. He's never seen AI. He sucks, big old-style amish balls. Some people suck. Jesse's incomprehensible. He SUCKS. He asks to get water, doesn't wait an answer, and leaves the room. He drinks. He returns. He still SUCKS. Even Paula's puzzled. Simon: "Why do you think we're looking for a 2 year old that can't sing?". LOL! And the "four" was funny too!

Someone's dressed as "Apollo Creed". I guess. Charles' the name, sucking's the name. He can kinda sing, but as the girl named Stevie proved last season, there's no room for operatic singers on Idol. Simon goes all tantrum about the outfit. Denise is a crack baby. She told us. No one asked her. No one wanted to know. She's loud. And she can sing. She's REALLY loud. She's through, after Simon showers her with love.

There's a "funny" health problem infomercial. That sucked. Tashawn's a wierd name for a girl. She doesn't know English. She doesn't know the lyrics. She SUCKS. And she continues to SUCK. And then she SUCKS some more. And then more. She SUCKS. She's through! Just kidding. She SUCKS. She's outta here! A chick flirts with Ryan, but calls him kinda short. That can't help her chances... Perla? What's up with all these fucking names? She's homeless. I think. She calls Simon Simone. LOL. She can sorta sing. Then she sings Shakira, and that's much MUCH better. She's through.

So far, no guy's gone through. A "cowboy"'s gonna be next. He's dull. He says Carrie didn't have the look he does. You mean, a good look? He sucks, bug hairy horsie balls. Randy and Jewel are mean. He's delusional (the cowboy). Kah'reem, is that supposed to be after Abdul Jabbar? He sucked. So did Alex. Jarrod's "In the Navy", but for real! He sings something Carrie sang, during her season. And he's alright. He's through.

Rakel's a wierd spelling for a normal name. She sucks. Trista barks. Or something. That's so wierd! She sucks, though. So she's outta here! Simon's speechless. Stephen's a vocal coach. He should be good, right? He's got a pitch pipe. He SUCKS, bit astroid balls. Randy's shaking his head. His falsetto's TERRIBLE! Randy's REALLY mean for him. Stephen keeps on about telling stories. Simon adds fuel to the fire. LOL! He really does suck. Really, REALLY bad. That argument was LONG.

Michelle's pretty. The start was horrible. The rest wasn't bad. She's through. The best thing about it, for her, is that she can quit her job. Some people quit to go audition. Dana's boss is a moron. Simon and Randy think she does special things for her boss. LOL. She kinda sucks. The falsetto SUCKED. She sucks. They want to meet her boss. She sings to her boss. They've got to be getting frisky every once in a while. She's outta here. And the judges keep talking about who's in love with who in that relationship. Matt's got a "sad" story. We now that because there's sad music in the background. He's kinda OK. He's through. He's got a HYOOGE mosquito bite on the tip of his nose. LOL...

Rachel's got army uniform on, but she worked in her family's body shop. Huh? Oh... She's in the army reserves. The song SUCKED. She's good. Something's strange, but she's good. She's through. She loves Simon. And his personality. Odd. And she talks to a picture of her husband. LOL. Sarah's good. A bit theatrical, but good. She's through.

There are a couple of STUPID ASS people left. One's a crazy Idol stalker. And the other's a juggler. Jason juggles. He SUCKS. Simon says even the juggling's pathetic. And it is. Randy's plugging a different show. And again. He can't dance, either. He's outta here. And he throws a fit. He gets pissed, and he curses, and he cries. He REALLY cries. Brenna looks scared shitless. And she's next. She's creepy. She's a superfan, and her favorite contestant's Ace? Seriously? She said "Under Pressure" is by Bowie and Freddie Mercury? SERIOUSLY? And she SUCKS. Big, hairy, Idol-super-fan balls. I'm sure she's got a couple. She's stupid, too. She's about to cry. And she's outta here. She doesn't cry, though.

We see a TERRIBLE Prince montage, from people that SUCK! LOL! "Prince will never be on this show, again...". LOL! Josh's a rocker, and his dad would have rather if he went to the NHL. Right. He sings Fuel. He has a punk-grunge sort of gravely voice. But he can kinda sing. Simon tells him to go back later and sing ABBA. LOL. And he scrambles to learn one. And he learns "Dancing Queen". LOL. And he sounds EXACTLY the same. The thing Chris did, every once in a while, was NOT rock. He's got a band. Simon's right. And he's not through. I kinda feel bad for him. I like rock! He goes back to his band. He then cries. Awww... Simon kissed Paula, Jewel AND Randy on the mouth. Gross. Just 17 are through from MN. Come on! Next, Seattle!

American Idol S05 - The Aftertaste

2009-07-01T19:28:00.003+03:00

Aftertaste? wha? Yeah, I'm really struggling to find new after-somthing's...

Melissa McGhee, the one that somehow won pageants - Didn't really do anything, actually. Performed at several places for a while after she was eliminated, but that soon came to a stop.

Kevin Covais, Chicken Little! - He's gone acting! Was in "College", and did a fabulous job, if I may add. Go watch! Will also appear in Ghost Whisperer, and a TV-film called Labor Pains, with Lindsay Lohan. Go Kev!

Lisa Tucker, "the best 16 year old we ever had" - She too has gone the acting way. An OC cameo, a series regular on Zoey 101 and The Suite Life On Deck, and appearances in 90210 and The Game, as well as two movie roles.

Mandisa, the overly preachy big girl - She's gone all christian/gospel in her music. 4 albums in that genre, the first of which got to number 1 in the Hot Christian Albums chart. Seriously! Also had 9 singles, the first one got to number 1 in the Singles Sales chart. Seriously! And she's had a Grammy nomination, again for gospel/christian something, but didn't win.

Bucky Covington, the country "boah" that no one understood - Hs first album hit number 1 in the Country Albums chart, and 3 singles were released from it, going to numbers 6, 11 and 10 on the Country Singles chart, respectively. A second album is in the works, and a single was a lready released from it. He was also in a movie!

Ace Young, the one that appealed to girls, so I didn't get him - Did all sorts of things, and released an album. Also had 2 singles.

Kellie Pickler, the cute girl that was all too overwhelmed by everything - She actually turned out to be a good country singer! Had two albums, both topping the Country Albums chart AND reaching number 9 on the Billboard 200, 5 singles and was nominated to 2 CMA's, 2 ACM's, and 5 CMT's, and she won 3 of the latter.

Paris Bennett, the one with the REALLY different singing and talking voices - Had an album, that didn't do all that well, and 3 singles. Kevin Covais rapped on a track in that album. SERIOUSLY! She's now working on her 2nd album.

Chris Daughtry, the rocker that was so much better than the rest - His band, Daughtry, with the others members of it being picked by his label, had an album, and are about to release a second one. The one released, called Daughtry, topped the Billboard 200 chart, sold 5.5 million units worldwide, and had 7 singles released from it, getting as high as number 4 in the Hot 100. A track from the upcoming album has been released as a single, and has so far peaked at number 15, again on the Hot 100. Has won 3 AMA's and 6 Billboard Music Awards.

Elliott Yamin, the nice jewish boy that has diabetes and is practically deaf in one ear - 2 albums, one certified gold, and 9 singles, one that got to 13 on the Hot 100 and was certified platinum.

Katharine McPhee, the one Simon thought would win it all - An album, 2 on the Billboarrd 200, and 5 singles. Had a cameo in Ugly Betty, landed a role in The House Bunny, and another lowbudget production, and appeared in a CSI:NY episode (as was Chris, but not in the same one).

Taylor Hicks, SOUL PATROL! and the one that actually won it - Had an album that went platinum, and another recently released, as well as a compilation album of his earlier work. 5 singles, the frst of which topped the Hot 100.

That's it, I think. It is worth mentioning that of the 12 finalists, 9 have recording deals and have released albums, and 6 semi-finalists and 3 that didn't even make it that far have recording deals as well.

American Idol S05 - The Idol Awards

2009-07-01T19:10:00.003+03:00

It's that time of the year. Again.

The Golden Idol - "Hemorrhage (In My Hands)". It was just THAT good...

The Silver Idol - "Over the Rainbow". Yeah. Good times.

The Manure Idol - "Copacabana". Remember that poor SOB? And how much he sucked?

The Justin Award - Since SOMEONE's gotta win, this'll go to Ace. I just didn't get him. Mandisa can get the consolation prize.

The Kelly Award - Tough one this season. Eventually, it was decided, by me, that Chris is this year's winner!

The Tamyra Award - Again, a VERY tough one. It basically goes to anyone cut before Kevin and Kellie. and also to Elliott and Chris. Kat should have gone, instead of Chris. And then it would have been a free for all in the Top 3.

The McKibbin Award - Again, though. But I'll give it to Kevin, Kellie and Kat. They can share it.

The MFM Award - My oh my. This was a funny season! Kellie's numerous misunderstandings and mispronounciations, Crazy Dave, his fall off the stage in the finale, and the look on the Clay wannabe's face when he realised Clay was standing next to him at the finale. Also, Kevin's playing along to the whole sex symbol things was LOL-at-ish.

The MIRWHTDB Award - Kevin and Kellie! Chris gets a small one, I mean he did do very well... Bucky's honorable mention.

The Saddest Moment Award - Any time either Kat's dad, Elliot's mom or Elliot himself cried. Those poor people!

I think that's enough... I dunno...

American Idol S05E41 - Top 2: The Finale Results

2009-07-01T02:43:00.002+03:00

2... 1! 1! 1! Who will it be? WHO? WHO!!!!

We start with Carrie! YAY FOR CARRIE! She sings with Taylor and Kat, a song called "Through the Rain", by Mariah Carey, I think. And they are joined by the rest of the Top 12. They are all in all-whites.

Ben Stiller and Heather Locklear are in the audience. We ARE live. 200 million are watching, Ryan tells us. And he wastes some time. We get a video of Randy saying dude a lot of times. And hot. And dawg. And wow. He's here, and he's all pimped out wit da suit. A Paula video's next. And we get proof of the drugs. Real proof. Then it's a Simon video, or as Ryan said, The Ego Has Landed. He does all sorts of wierd stuff with his fingers. And hands. Odd. And he's sporting a cleavage tonight. Great...

We go to Birgminham, AB. The O'Donohue TWINS are here! HAWT! There are thousands of grey haired people there. Next, to Here, Here, Universal Studios. Tamyra's thee, and she looks FINE.

Paris is the first to sing, and she does so with Al Jarrea, singing "We're in This Love Together" by Al Jarreau. Mr. Al's Vocal gymnastics get tired, REAL fast.

Chris performs with Live, the band. They have a bald lead singer. Chris' bald too. LOL. They sing "Mystery" by Live, and it's totally awesome. Chris is still great, for those of you that weren't sure. All three of you.

Kellie meets Wolfgang Puck. HA! LOL! ROFL! She looks AWESOME! She's going to eat something posh. She's going to eat escargot. Gross! She's grossed out! And she doesn't believe people actually eat it. LOL! And Wolfgang tries to pronounce Albemarle. LOL!

Meat Loaf is next, and he performs "It's All Coming Back to Me Now" by Celine Dion . Meat Loaf's REALLY over the top. The choreography and "acting" SUCKED!

We get a retrospective be Ryan, and the Golden Idols awards are announced! Because, well, the show hasn't won any REAL award... First, the Outstanding Female Vocals. The nominees all SUCK. One is delusional, one's the TAN girl, and one's the girl who thought she sounded like aretha. And the last one wins it, and Ryan makes a funny comment about the humiliation of the suckers! lol! Outstanding Male Vocalist. One did all the fingers stuff, one sweated a lot, and could sing in 3 pitches, and one's Crazy Dave. Crazy Dave wins it, hands down. And he sang Meat Loaf! LOL! And he won! And HE'S HERE! LOL! He runs around the stage, AND FALLS OFF OF IT! LOL!

Back to Puck 'n' Pick. LMAO! She jumped when they brought the live lobsters. LOL! And then Puck scared her! LOL!

The guys are "Taking Care of Business", by BTO, complete with a harmonica solo by Taylor. Then it's "Tobacco Road". Taylor still plays harmonica. LOL at Chicken Little with the deep-voiced "Tobacco Road". LOL! "Don't Stop" by Fleetwood Mac's next. Very good fun! Taylor can really play the harmonica, REALLY well!

FORD! "Don't Stop" by Fleetwood Mac, again. We get a summary of the various Ford commercials, and some outtakes. lol! And Kat and Tay are getting a Ford Convertible Mustang, each!

Another Golden Idol - Proudest Family Moment. The nominees are Elliot's mom, Kat's dad, Chris' wife. And the winner is Elliot's mom! She introduces Elliot, who singing "One" by U2, with Mary J. Blige. We caught a glimpse of the teleprompter. And another! It's not as much a duet, as it is two singers, each singing a different part, and at the end singing together. But it was good! I LOVE U2!

CARRIE'S HERE! She sings "Don't Forget to Remember Me", by herself! I LOVE HER! She looks TERRIFIC! And she sounds great. But you already knew that. She looks GORGEOUS!

Someone gets a Jackson Award. it's the FATASS that hated on Paula. With the silver tubetop! I HATE HER! Ryan says she is "working" tonight. LOL! And we get her response to geting the award. Laughable. Somewhat amusing.

Taylor's next. He sings "In the Ghetto" with Toni Braxton. It was very nice. Thought Toni sounded like a dude. I dunno.

The Girls are next! "Man! I Feel Like a Woman", "Trouble" by Elvis, "I'm A Woman" by Bette Midler, "(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman", "I'm Every Woman". NICE!

Some more Golden Idols. Best Impersonation - a Cher one, a Jacko one, a Clay one (the one that had to pee). And the Clay one wins. And he's there to accept his award. He's going to sing. WHY??? He looks BUTT UGLY when he sings. And Clay walks in behind him! LOL! And he makes the most annoyed face EVER looking at the imitation. LOL! And the imitator's shocked. And Clay sings. I like the new hair on the Clayken. And they sing together. "Don't Let the Sun Go Down On Me". Either they closed the sucky one's mic, or Clay's just THAT much more powerful, vocally. Me thinks the sucky one's in love with the awesome one. That was really cool!

A Burt Bacharach tribute , featuring Burt on piano! Cool! "What the World Needs Now is Love"- Taylor, Kat. Ace and melissa are singing "The Look of Love". Kellie sings "I'll Never Fall In Love Again". Bucky sings "Raindrops Keep Fallin' On My Head". LOL! Mandisa's backed up by Lisa, Kellie and Paris on "I Say a Little Prayer". Lisa sings "Alfie"? Huh? Elliott, which i just noticed I misspelled his name ALL SEASON LONG, sings "A House is Not a Home", BRILLIANTLY, if I may add. Kevin sings "What's New Pussycat?". ROFL! CUTE! LOL! And Kellie Paris and Lisa do a little funny routine behind the piano. NICE! Chris and Ace join him, and they're singing "Arthur's Theme (Best That You Can Do)". Paris sings "Close to You". Dionne Warwick is in da house! She sings "Walk On By". AWESOME! "That's What Friends Are For" closes the medley, and everyone joins Dionne on it. AWESOME!

This is turning out to be quite the awesome finale, even though i couldn't care less who actually won!

Golden Idol time! Best Male Bonding. Ace and Chris hugging when Ace makes it to the Top 24, to the sounds of some grunts and moans. Ryan and Taylor, laying on the floor. And Brokenote Mountain. Garet! yay! Matthew! Michael! And Brokenote won! And they're here! And they sing! "Mammas Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to be Cowboys". LOL! That was actually very good! I liked it!

We are entering the results portion of the show. That means about an hour more to go! AND PRINCE IS IN DA HOUSE! Or the Artist Formerly Known as Prince. I don't know which. Never can tell the difference. He sings "Lolita". Shocker! Then he sings "Satisfied". The two chicks practically making out is hot! And the performance is great!

Taylor and Kat sing "(I've Had) The Time of My Life". Weel, they have to do a duet. And it was a good one, too!

On to the results! 63.4 MILLION VOTES! WOW! And... TAYLOR WINS! SOUL PATROL! David Hasselhoff's NEARLY crying. Not quite. The only thing Taylor wants ot say to his fans is SOUL PATROL!!! And Taylor sings about asking if we're proud of him now. And we get the confetti and fireworks. And WHOOO's. And thankyou's to everyone.

American Idol S05E40 - Top 2: The Finale

2009-07-01T01:52:00.002+03:00

2... 2! It's here! The finale's here!

We are live, if you were wondering. Like we didn't know that, already, and have known that for the past 2 monthes. Randy advises them to leave it all on the line. Paula tells them to pick the right songs. Simon thinks they should pray the other one fumbles the words.

We see Kat AND Taylor's journeys on Idol. We are reminded Simon said no to Tay, and that he thought he won't be put in the top 24. And I remember Simon said Kat was the one that will win it all, all the way back in January-ish. Soul Patrol? McPheever? Just sing well...

Chris is IN DA HOUSE! So is Bucky, but no love for him!

Round 1 - Song Already Performed

1) Katharine - "Black Horse and the Cherry Tree" by KT Tunstall. Usually, reprise performances don't hold a candle to the original one. This should be no exception. She's not squatting/sitting on the floor this time. Thankfully. And, as expected, it was good, but not as good as the original. Randy thinks she looked like she had fun. He also thinks she sang it better than her first time around. Paula rambles. Simon gives it a good, with a small g. He says the occasion is bigger than the song. The McPhans and Kat Pack sent her like a 1000 roses. Nice of them.

2) Taylor - "Living for the City" by Stevie Wonder. The pink velvet (?) suit top was HIDEOUS! The performance, I think, was actually better than the original performance, amazingly enough. At the very least, it was at the same level the one he did for Stevie week. Paula's screaming and clapping. Randy loves he doesn't care about the song, and lets us know that's a hawt one right there. Paula mumbles, and screams to the audience. Simon jokes the audience hates him. He thought it was a great way to start the show, great performance, worst jacket ever, and round 1 goes to him. I concur.

First Round Winner: Taylor

Round 2 - Another Song Already Performed

1) Katharine - "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" by Judy Garland. Her best performance was in the Top 3, singing this, but that was only a week ago, and she's gonna sing it again? Why? And it's an identical copy. Without the surprise effect. It was good. REALLY good. But not as good as when she first sang it. Her dad cries. Obviously. Randy tries to talk, but the audience doesn;t let him. He was worried about doing the song again, but thinks she worked it out and that it was hot. Paula rambles. Simon says, after being slaughtered in round 1, she outperformed herself, and that that was her best performance in the competition. She rambles about not hearing the key n the earpiece, and still being able to start on the right key, in the a capella. CUTE!

2) Taylor - "Levon" by Elton John. PROBABLY his best performance in the competition was the first time he sang this. Probably. Again, not as good as the first time he sang it, but REALLY really good. Randy liked the song, but, to keep it real, it was a little pitchy for him, this time. Paula rambles. She's REALLY stupid. Simon says Paula doesn't make any sense. And he thinks Kat's taken the second round. I dunno. I guess.

Second Round Winner: Katharine

Round 3 - Original Song

COCA COLA! Kat, as a child, heard scales going up and down. And her mom thinks she was born to do this.

1) Katharine - "My Destiny". WOW, that song sucked. BIG TIME. And the choir's back! yay... When she really belted the high notes, she was, as she usually is, screechy. the softer parts were sort of OK, but overall, it's like she ran a marathon, was first, by a mile or so, got to within an inch of the finish line, and then just collapsed/decided to have a couple of hours worth of a nap. No one's sure which. Randy's got 3 things for her. She looks amazing (she does). She sounded really good (maybe, for some...). The song sucked. Paula rambles. Simon thinks she went from brilliant to quite good, with one song. He advises the Kat voters to remember her 2nd song.

COCA COLA! Taylor just picked up a harmonica and started playing. No training whatsoever. DUDE! Awesome!

2) Taylor - "Do I Make You Proud". Wow. These original songs are some of the crappiest shit, EVER. To me, it was just ever so slightly better than Kat's original piece of shit. The song was marginally less sucky too. That's not really fair. Randy thought the song was slightly better, and loves that Taylor knows who he is. I know who I am... Paula Rambles and talks some nonsense. Simon thinks he has just won American Idol. Not Simon. Taylor. We are reminded by Ryan that Simon passed on Taylor n his first audition. LOL. That's GOT to earn him some more votes!

Third Round Winner: Taylor, by about this much.

Overall Winner: Taylor, by about this much.

And Daniel Powter's live! And he does, what else, "Bad Day". I kinda like this song... In the background we see a recap of the season.

Kaka! 8! Kaka!

2009-07-01T00:19:00.003+03:00

He's here! Finally!

The player known worldwide as Kaka was presented today in the Santiago Bernabeu, in front of 40,000 (!!!) fans, and 500 journalists.

The Brazilian phenomenon, nicknamed O Galactico, The Galactic, a reference to the Galacticos of Perez's previous era in Real, will wear the number 8 for the next 6 season, at least.

YAY! I'M HAPPY! WOOHOO!

American Idol S05E39 - Top 3 Results

2009-06-30T19:52:00.004+03:00

3... 2! yay!

Ace AND Kellie are in da house! (Yes, I'll be writing properly from now on...)

More than 50 million votes were cast. 50 million!

Does anyone else notice how Simon's always giving instructions to the other two? It's like, he tells them if the songs were good or not, and when to talk, and all. Wierd.

Recap.

FORD! "Young at Heart" by someone. Did they really think a RAPPING Ford commercial was a good idea? Ryan wasn't aware Simon was having a party. LOL!

Ryan makes us fel bad for the Top 3. Hugh Jackman and Rebecca Romijn met them, and they had a surprise for them! It's a DVD of the new X-Men movie! Cool for them!

Taylor was excited to go back because he ate a lot, including ribs and pancakes for breakfast. LOL. So we see his return home, to the tune of "Soul Man". He ALSO went to the Rick and Bubba show. And he was on TV, and not on Idol. He performed with his band. And then he was in a parade. Lame... "We are... Soul Patrol... We are... Soul Patrol...". Sounds like a robotic brainwashed drone for me. He got the key to the city. He goes to the city he went to high school in, to a shopping center FILLED with people. He plays with his band, again. And he plays guitar/bass! Then he meets the governor. And he gets a day. And Taylor inductes the governor and his wife to the Soul Patrol. Ha. He sings "Takin' It to the Streets", from the shamelessly plugged Encores CD! And Kat and Elliot dance behind him! LOL!

Kat's 10 minute drive back home was ardous, and we see her return home. She gets on Good Day LA. Then, to the radio! It's the KROQ Kevin and Bean Show! Then KISS FM. Then a chopper ride. She returns to her high school, Notre Dame HS. The mayor of LA's there, and gives Kat her own day. And she sings. A lot of eople hug her. She gets a drive around the block to her parents' house, and her dogs! She's got a goddaughter! She's a godmother! She's got an ofer you can't refuse! PLEASE, get that last one... She doesn't really talk with her family. She sings "Think".

Gavin DeGraw's in da house. Next is Elliot, he felt like a king, and we see his admittedly longer trip home than Kat's, to Richmond, VA. And he too got a day. He gets on a radio show, like everyone. He goes back to his old job place, the pharmecy. Next, he's going to jam out to some music. People got on rooftops to see him! WOW! He and his mom meet the governor. Virgina is for Elliot Lovers, apparently. He gets to throw the first pitch, in a MLB game, i think. And unlike Ryan, he doesn't completely suck at it. He's crying. Paula's crying. Others're crying. He sings "Moody's Mood for Love". Paula's high as a kite.

We get a reminder of what AI has done for those that won. 90 number 1 hits, 29 gold and platinum albums, and more than 33 million copies sold. And, of course, Clive Davis is the one that was behind it all. And he's here. And he gets a standing ovation. He gets a plaque for the 33 million sales. He gives a speech. He talks REALLY slowly. Kelly's first sold 3 million, her second 10, even in countries that are Idol-less, and she won 2 grammys. Ruben and Clay got number 1s and sold some millions. Fantasia sold 2 million albums, and got 4 Grammy nominations. Bo's album's on his way to platinum, and Carrie's already sold 3 million albums. DAMN. He's thankful to AI and the important guys there.

We get some numbers: 33.06%, 33.26% and 33.68%. But what does that mean??? That's the break down of the votes recieved for tonight's show. And the lowest number goes to... Elliot... He's outta here. Paula's almost crying. Almost. So the finale will be Tay v Kat. Ryan congratulates him for getting this far. Elliot's grateful for the opportunity. We see his journey on Idol. And he too gets the crappy version of "Bad Day". NOW Paula's crying. He sings "I Believe to My Soul".

American Idol S05E38 - Top 3

2009-06-30T18:03:00.002+03:00

3! 3! 3!

3 left, 3 songs each, 3 judges, 3 judges picks, 3 clive davis picks, 3 contestants picks, 3...

ryan assures us that this is where it gets serious, and that THIS, is, still, aMMMerican idol. and we are reminded that clive davis probably knows what he's talking about. he's in da house, but NOT going to guest judge. huh?

round 1 - clive's pick

1) elliot - "open arms" by journey. i think clive davis used to play bass for journey. OH, WAIT! it was randy! right! we see elliot having a sit down with clive. and elliot feels blessed. remember when clay sang it, was great, but still didn't move through? i see a repeat! he did a pretty good job. randy reminds us he was in journey. really? he thinks he worked it out. like beyonce? paula rambles. simon liked the song choice, but thought it was stiff, and not a great performance.

2) katharine - "i believe i can fly" by r. kelly. again, we see her meeting clive. the arrangement sucked. and the smiling and playing with the camera's got to stop! remember the constance? yeah! stop it! she looks great. but she sounds average. shrieky and screchy at the high parts. and the whole song's high. i dunno. randy doesn't believe she's r. kelly. well, duh. it wasn't the right thing for him. paula rambles. and she's coming out. i think. LOL! randy says song choice, and kat says she didn't pick it! LOL! simon thinks randy's unfair. he thinks that other than a couple of bum notes at the end, she created a bit of a moment for herself, there. huh?

3) taylor - "dancing in the dark" by bruce springsteen. with that song choice, you think clive's trying to tell taylor something? we, AGAIN, see him meeting clive. and clive asked bruce, PERSONALLY, to allow the song to be sung. awesome! best fit so far, song to singer. and he dances with paula! lol! and then he runs away from her! lol! he had an odd "dancings" or something at the end. but overall, best yet. not awesome, but best yet. randy loves that he danced with paula and had fun. paula rambles. simon thought it was ok, but paled in comparison with the original.

LOL! simon says that, for her age, paula's dancing was fantastic. LOL!

1. taylor
2. elliot
3. katharine

round 2 - judges' pick

1) elliot - "what you won't do for love" by bobby caldwell. this one's paula's choice, and the mayor of richmond, va announces the pick. and paula rambles about why she picked it. the funky white boy that has soul and rythm. huh? i knew it sounded familiar! matt rogers did it once upon a time! very nice. high five! other borat comments! randy thought he was sharp most of the song, and that it wasn't his best. paula rambles. simon thought he sang that pretty good.

2) katharine - "somewhere over the rainbow" by judy garland. this one's simon's choice. the mayor of la announces the pick. simon thinks it's perfect for her. she starts a capella. sitting. looking up. and she's then joined by a piano. and she doesn't smile. AWESOME! her best performance, by a MILE! just superb! simon's right! amazing! the arrangement was FANTASTIC too! randy, after a while, says it's the best vocal of the season from her, and that it was brilliant and hot. paula rambles. kat looks ecstatic. simon's happy for her. he thinks it the nest performance of the season. NO, but it was up there.

3) taylor - "you are so beatiful" by joe cocker. this one's randy's choice. the governor of alabama announces the pick, after being inducted to the dawgpound. lol. randy gets the joe cocker vibe from taylor, and hence the pick. he looked so hesitant, but it was really, REALLY good for the performance of the song. like a shy teen admitting his love to a girl. again, his falsetto is very pleasant to hear. a fantastic performance. one of his best, and just behind kat's rainbow tonight. randy loved the great tender moment. paula rambles. simon thinks it's his best performance, by a mile. and he's happy! and clapping! and smiles! lol!

kat and taylor just blew elliot out of the water in this round... and he's supposed to be the best male vocalist they've ever had!

1. katharine
2. taylor
.
.
3. elliot

round 3 - contestants' pick

COCA COLA! we hear elliot's choice. a donny hathaway version of a ray charles song.

1) elliot - "i believe to my soul" by donny hathaway. liked the change up ("when you know my name is elliot", lol!), and it was a VERY good performance. a REALLY good one. paula's screaming. zac efron's in da house. randy didn't love the song choice, but he can definitrly sing and did a good job. paula rambles. and she calls him a funky white boy. simon thinks the songs won't carry him over. but, he's a great man, singer and will make his mom proud no matter what. and we learn elliot's good looks are from his mum. yeah, i know.

COCA COLA! mcphever! she didn't want to be compared to anyone, so she chose an onld song.

2) katharine - "i ain't got nothin' but the blues" by ella fitzgerald. the intro of it was VERY cabaret, as was the whole song, but that's the era and style, i guess. again, when she powers the high notes, it gets shrieky. but despite that, it was still pretty good. randy thought it was ok. he diesn't know. paula rambles. and she refused to comment on this song. lol. simon thought she took a step back. he too, wished the middle round should have been the last round, cause that was all of their best.

COCA COLA! taylor's doing the song for the soul patrol.

3) taylor - "try a little tenderness" by otis redding. again, not as good as his second performance, but it was REALLY good! like, REALLY, really good! i liked it! randy's got a new name for him. if he could be heard. "have-a-good-time-funky taylor". huh? paula rambles, but she does say she waited the entire season to hear him sing it. simon hated the ending, but thought the song choice and the performance were great, and he'll see him at the finale.

1. taylor
2. elliot
3. katharine

overall ranking:

1. taylor
2. katharine
3. elliot

American Idol S05E37 - Top 4 Results

2009-06-30T17:33:00.002+03:00

4... 3...

recap

FORD! "what a wonderful world" by louis armstrong. quite fun. an kermit was there!

we see the idols going to graceland and getting a tour of the place. 150!!! gold and platinum records!!! 150!!! and they meet lisa marie, and drive in a golf cart.

GROUP SONG: an elvis medley! "jailhouse rock" (the opening notes), "treat me nice" (the backing singers thing was cool!), "blue suede shoes" (go kat go! lol!), "hartbreak hotel", "are you lonesome tonight?", "love me tender" (again with the cool backing singers thing!), "i just can't help believin'", "burning love". REALLY COOL! and fun! and good!

rebecca romijn's in da house! she's hot. she wants taylor to sing "jailhouse rock" again, after plugging x-men for a bit. and he sings it! wow! he has to run to his starting spot, but he actually sings it! cool! it was really fun! i think even simon was digging it!

so to the results! taylor stands on one side of ryan's. elliot joins him, and chris and kat stand on the other side. ryan REALLY draws it out. kat looks pissed. elliot and taylor are safe. kat and chris are bottom 2.

chris is a bit surprised. simon thinks kat should go home. she's ticked off. ryan says a lot of people predicted the two will be in the finale, and that chris will win. they are wrong. chris' outta here! shock! everybody's stunned! kathrine can't believe it! chris tries to hide his rage! shock! paula's crying. simon's shocked. chris admits he's shocked. we see his journey on idol. again with the "special" version of "bad day". he looks pissed. everybody's cheering. other than paula. she's crying. and chris sings "suspicious minds".

American Idol S05E36 - Top 4

2009-06-30T15:29:00.002+03:00

4...

and it's elvis night! twice! we see the 4 going to graceland, graceland, memphis, tennessee. they meet priscilla presley, and tommy mottola.

1) taylor - "jailhouse rock". they changed the key up. i think. and he starts in the audience. and he's dancing again. lol! everytime he does the dancing on an uptempo song, like here, it is way fun. not great, but WAY fun! randy had fun. paula rambles. simon gives a reality check, and says it was a terrible impersonation of elvis, the dancing sucked, and it was karaoke with a capital K. i think we got ourselves a taylor hator.

COCA COLA! the daughtry gang, chris' crew, chrisaholics... lol. he gets lots of gifts from fans.

2) chris - "suspicious minds". it's his all time fave elvis song. the look tonight is REALLY wierd. i maintain my opinion that he is the best of the left. the stomping was a bit much, and the arrangement was off, but he really is really good. randy said it was nice. kinda nice. paula rambles. and she talks crap. simon says, other than the sunglasses, it worked.

3) elliot - "if i can dream". tommy said he doesn't want it to sound like a bar-mitzvah song. ha. one of the cheesier songs. vocally, great. but performance... not so much. he really just stood there. i dunno. it was pretty good. randy thought he laid it out, and it was hawt. paula rambles. simon thinks he's the underdog tonight, chose an obscure song, and it was the best so far. i dunno about that.

4) katharine - "hound dog"/"all shook up". a medley? since when? she scored big with tommy. SCORE! remember when carrie tried to be sexy and trouble last season? and it didn't really work? well, at least she didn't mess up the lyrics, unlike kat tonight. and the ending was screechy. she should really stick to the ballads. or the horses and the cherry trees. randy knows she had a good time, but noticed she messed the words. paula rambles. simon called a desperate, manic audition. and shrieky. and it wasn't great, overall. yep. she's still hot.

1. chris
2. elliot
3. taylor
4. katharine

COCA COLA! taylor says graceland was great. and they did something. i dunno. but he DIDN'T ask priscilla out.

1) taylor - "in the ghetto". tommy was very impressed with him singing this. and he's not going to dance. awww! that was REALLY good! he even pulled out a nice sounding falsetto in the middle. not as good as something, or levon, but definitely up there. randy thought the key was right, the song was right, that's the kind of record he should make, and it was hot. paula rambles. simon thought the first performance was silly, but he has now sung his way to the semifinals. you mean top 3? cause the semis ended about 2 monthes ago.

2) chris - "a little less conversation". tommy thinks h can rise to the occasion. it started great. not too loud, and not too quiet. he didn't dance, like jpl. the shouts at the end were a bit unnecessary. but i REALLY liked it! randy thought the key was right, and it was hawt! paula rambles. simon thought the first song was better, and until the end it wasn't him, and it was ok. for me, it's just ever so slightly better than taylor. really ever so slightly.

3) elliot - "trouble". tommy thinks he pulled it off well, but we'll see. he can't really pull that song off, like carrie last season, but he got the arrangement much better, and he did a GREAT job with it. if someone that was actually evil would have sung it like that, it'd be fantastic, but as it's elliot, it was great. randy thought it was his best ever. paula rambles. and she's got love handles. simon thinks he deserves to go through, after he showed personality.

ryan calls paula a stripper, what with her moves and all. HA!

4) katharine - "can't help falling in love". tommy thinks she can do incredible things with her voice. she smiles too much, and the arrangment SUCKS! the beginning, minus the first bar or so, that was REALLY too high, sounded great. and then the band kicked in. ugh. it was a'ight for me. just ok. randy thought it was better than the first song, and heard pitchy problems. paula rambles. simon agrees with me. apple pie and a gallon of cream on it. lol. it was accurate.

1. elliot
2. chris
3. taylor
4. katharine

overall ranking:

1. elliot
2. chris
3. taylor
4. katharine

American Idol S05E35 - Top 5 Results

2009-06-30T04:50:00.002+03:00

5... 4...

some banter. bla bla bla.

GROUP SONG: "together we are one" by delta goodrem. finally, we get another group performance. it's been a while.

FORD! "hollywood swinging" by kool & the gang. and they all dressed up at the end. lol.

simon said something about a poll and some 78% agreeing with him, or something.

recap

the ones that will move throgh tonight will be wisked off on a rivate jet, to graceland, for some lessons on elvis. who will be there? let's find out. taylor's safe. chris' safe. paris' bottom 2. she hands ryan her gum, and she sings "kiss". and she dances, and almost lost something, that ryan had to follow her around with. lol. kat's safe. she's shocked. elliot's bottom 2. and he sings "on broadway".

elliot's safe. paris' outta here! we see her journey on idol. and she sings "be without you".

American Idol S05E34 - Top 5

2009-06-30T04:04:00.004+03:00

5...

two themes, one is year they were born, the other's this week billboard top 10 charts.

round 1 - year they were born

1) elliot - "on broadway" by george benson. as this night is hectic and fast, so will i be. very very good. randy says it started rough, but got very nice. paula rambles. simon called it disjointed. huh? i didn't hear what randy said about the start. it was also MUCH better than scott last week.

COCA COLA! she's gonna do kiss, by prince, released 2 years before she was born. but someone had a hit with it in 88, so we'll let it slide.

2) paris - "kiss" by prince. wierd song choice for a solo vocalist. she didn't do the "mwah mwah", kissing sounds part, and her "kiss" after it was wierd, like it was too high or something. she did do alright with it. randy thought it was nice and liked it. paula rambles. simon called it screechy and annoying. simon's kinda right. i dunno.

3) chris - "renegade" by styx. REALLY??? WHY??? why styx??? WHY??? he's back to rocking. not as hard as creed, but still rocking. and it was very good. not his best, but good. randy says we got a REAL hot one tonight. paula rambles. simon says it was a million times better than the first 2, and it was a great song choice. oddly enough, it was a good song choice. i fell bad for myself.

COCA COLA! kat had a wardrobe malfunction last week. huh? she feels like she's wearing a trash bag. lol.

4) katharine - "against all odds (take a look at me now)" by phil collins. WHY??? WHY??? WHY??? she chose the most oversung songs in idol history, one after the other. ugh. she does an ok job with this piece of crap. randy thought the key was wrong, and it was ok at the end. paula rambles. simon thought it was a mess in parts, and it got away from her.

some wierd, amusing, kinda funny banter.

5) taylor - "play that funky music" by wild cherry. he used to be a blonde! then brunette! awesome! awesome song choice! awesome! the dancing's back! lol! apart from the band being too loud at the chorus, i REALLY liked it! and he dropped to the floor at the end! lol! randy thought it was a bar sort of performance, but it was fun. paula rambles. simon called it a horrible horrible wedding performance. and then he and ryan drop to the floor, and do the numbers and the soul patrol screaming from there. lol!

1. chris
2. taylor
3. elliot
4. katharine
5. paris

round 2 - current week's top 10

we get some lessons on the billboard charts. 90 number 1's, breaking a 40 year old record, and having daniel powter's bad day at the number 1 spot for five weeks, are some of the idol and it's pupils' accomplishments.

1) elliot - "home" by michael buble. he sings about going home? seriously? he did REALLY well on the song, though it didn't seem that tough. elliot runs off, and is run back to the spot to get the comments. lol. randy loved seeing a tender side of him, and thought it was a nice choice. paula rambles. simon wouldn't choose the wanting to go home tonight song. and he's worried about him going home. and he tells him to run to ryan again. lol.

2) paris - "be without you" by mary j blige. better than the first song she did tonight. the big note at the middle, towards the end, was just awkward and bad. but other than that, it was very ok. randy heard pitch problems, but she rocked it, and he liked that. paula rambles. simon thought she did rather well with it. and aula screams at him. lol.

3) chris - "i dare you" by shinedown. he's got a leather jacket on. and a flames background. different from the burger king commercial, but still flames. and again, i REALLY like the rocking chris. i REALLY like the not-so-rocking chris too. apart from some screamy bits at the end, it was good. randy didn't love the song for him, and it was just alright for him. paula rambles. simon thought the song wasn't great, and that his voice is going, but he should be alright, after a good first song.

4) katharine - "black horse and cherry tree" by kt tunstall. she sits on the floor, and count-starts the song. and she does a whole routine, all while sitting/squatting on the floor, that's nothing more than distracting, because vocally, it was one of her better performances. randy thought it was more like the kat he loves. paula rambles. simon says it a strange show, after taylor laying down and her sitting. he liked the song choice, and thought it was younger, and some other stuff.

5) taylor - "something" by the beatles. i LOVE this song. and the beatles. and this song. and harrison. harrison's a genius. did i mention i LOVE this song? a very subdued performance, sans crazy people dancing. it was like watching the two sides of taylor. on the one hand, he's an entertainer, and a great fun to watch. but on theother hand, he's also a VERY good singer. this was thesinging side. REALLY good. randy liked the beatles vibe tonight. paula rambles. simon questions the fit to the theme. and he agrees with me about the two sides. yay!

1. taylor
2. katharine
3. elliot
4. chris
5. paris

overall ranking:

1. taylor
2. chris
3. katharine
4. elliot
5. paris

American Idol S05E33 - Top 6 Results

2009-06-30T03:34:00.002+03:00

6... 5...

ryan makes fun of paula crying last night. ha. and then he says randy's the only sane one. ha. simon admits he was unfair to kat.

recap

FORD! "call me" by blondie, and the idol wannabes are running after their lost dog. and he's got a bitch!

david foster and andrea bocelli are here, and are going to perform, i guess. andrea says he's going to have a tough time foloowing the hopefuls, and david says he's always mean. and they're going to go on tour. i think.

GUEST SONG: "because we believe", from the album amore. he's good and all, but it is so boring!

lisa's in the audience. and they're plugging her oc apperance.

results! we get three groups of two. whatever... kat goes long. elliot goes middle. kellie goes short. paris joins kellie. taylor joins elliot. chris joins kat. one group got the most, one the least, and one in the middle. elliot and taylor are safe. chris and kat got the most votes. the bottom 2's paris and kellie.

kellie thinks she deserves to be there. and she's outta here! paris' safe. we see kelly's journey on idol. and it's a different version of "bad day". she talks with ryan for a bit. no song.

American Idol S05E32 - Top 6

2009-06-30T01:54:00.003+03:00

6...

love songs' the theme, and andrea bocelli and david foster are the mentors. they try to teach the idolettes to vocalize, and they fail. miserably. david foster can be mean. AWESOME!

1) katharine - "i have nothing" by whitney houston. WHY would you choose a song that's been sung about a gazillion times on idol before? david and andrea change the song up a bit, and blind andrea tells david she's beatiful. say what? she's got smaller ta-tas than i thought. she's still hot. other than the part they changed, which i thought was great, it was all just ok. i 'unno. randy thought the song choice was good, but it was way too big for her. paula rambles. what's up with her mic? simon thought she wasn't as good as whitney, it was old fashioned, and cabaret.

COCA COLA! yaminians? elliot's gonna sing "a song for you" by donny hathaway. he sang it in his audition, and in the exec-producer round. HUH? a backup singer is donny's daughter. coo'.

2) elliot - "a song for you" by donny hathaway. david's mean to him, but it works!and then he talked about licks. i dunno. it's always wierd when the mic completely hides their mouth. vocally, he was as good as ever, but PERFORMANCE-wise, it was probably his best outing. in the last, like really last part, when he stood in front of the mic stand, he made all these wierd faces. randy hated the arrangement, but he loved him. and he was da bomb. paula rambles. and she cries! she really does! she cries! simon reminds us that he told elliot some weeks back he was potentially the best make vocalist they've ever had, and says that at parts it was like a vocal masterpiece. DUDE! awesome!

COCA COLA! kellie doesn't have a boyfriend, so she's got no one to dedicate "unchained melody" to. and then she rambles about pottery and ghosts. i dunno.

3) kellie - "unchained melody" by the righteous brothers. WHY would she pick this song? WHY???? david thinks she was robotic. and they make her try the HIGH note at the end. DUDE! and andrea somehow knows she's a blonde. the start's key was REALLY too low for her. and the hair was funky, and not in a good way. and it was really, REALLY slow and boring. the performance part was sucky, and vocally, other than the ending, she was all over the place. pretty bad. randy heard pitch problems, and thought it was really strange. paula rambles. simon thought it was like the never-ending-song. and he didn't feel warmth from the vocals. and the music cuts him.

4) paris - "the way we were" by barbara streisand. andrea's impressed with her HYOOGE voice. when she doesn't belt it out, it sounds really REALLY strange, especially in her lower register, when she just goes all over the map. she kept nodding or shaking her head. lol. vocally, though, it was really very good. she had better, MUCH better, but still pretty good. randy liked it, and thought it was pretty good. paula rambles. simon called it old fashioned, and ends it quickly so as to not be cut off by the music. lol.

5) taylor - "just once" by james ingram. andrea called him interesting, and david was drawn into him singing. gross. andrea thinks he chose the best song for him, and david thinks he has the most charisma. he comes out, wearing a tux sort of suit. he sounded kinda flat in bits, but he really is, arguably, the best performer of the bunch, and like the vonz last season, his personality can carry songs through. it was pretty good-ish. randy thought it was the wrong song choice, and it sounded like wierd karaoke. paula rambles. simon thinks he looked uptight, and he thinks it's a hotel lounge performance.

6) chris - "have you really ever loved a woman?" by bryan adams. they make him try to sing laying down. LOL! and that fixes what problem david had with it. LOL! i like the set up with the two guitarists flanking him. ok, so maybe he's the best performer. i dunno. BUT, out of thse left, he IS the best, period, when he's picking the right songs and gets the arrangements right. like tonight. randy thought it was amazing. paula screams. simon thought it was a great performance. YEAH!

we hear the judges talk during the recap. ugh.

1. chris
2. elliot
3. paris
4. taylor
5. katharine
6. kellie

American Idol S05E31 - Top 7 Results

2009-06-30T01:28:00.002+03:00

7... 6...

who will be voted out, after what was one of the best episodes ever?

recap

FORD! "kids in america" by kim wilde. and the kids are in america, and they are ads and billboards. hmmm.... a'ight.

rod stewart's here, and he sits with the top 7 and ryan. he says the kids were easy to work with. he got 14 grammy nominations, apparently. he's working on a 70s classic rock album. coo'. and if they do that as a theme, he's happy to come back and help the hopefuls.

GUEST SONG: "the way you look tonight" by fred astaire. very classy, yet again.

next week, andrea bocelli will mentor the kids, and the theme will be great love songs. huh?

to the results! and it's a group thing, AGAIN. elliot goes long. chris goes short. paris joins chris. kellie joins elliot. ace joins paris and chris. kat joins elliot and kellie. taylor's left, and he's safe. and again, they make the one left join the group he thinks is safe. AFTER the break. he shakes chris' hand, and joins elliot, kellie and kat. and he's right. they're safe.

paris' safe. simon thinks ace's history. and he's right. ace's outta here! chris' safe. we see ace's journey on idol. and he sings, after declaring this is his time.

American Idol S05E30 - Top 7

2009-06-29T05:20:00.003+03:00

7...

so the theme's the great american songbook, and the mentor's rod stewart. we see the top 7 meeting him.

1) chris - "what a wonderful world" by louis armstrong. GREAT song. he's looking snazzy. o. m. g. even from the short snippet we heard of the session with rod, you could tell this is going to be good. GREAT. and, again, VERY nice to see him doing a song that's not filled with screaming. brilliant. great. awesome. lovely. i LOVED it. randy called it da bomb. paula rambles. simon wants to take credit for the performance. lol.he thought it was great.

COCA COLA! paris celebrated easter.

2) paris - "these foolish things" by billie holiday. her mom cries when she sings. ALL. THE. TIME. rod was a gravedigger at 17. lol. it was a very good, classy performance. BUT, i was kinda bored. i dunno. randy thought it was her greatest performance ever. paula rambles. simon was bewildered. he thought it was terrific. ryan thinks simon's drunk, because he's nice/happy tonight. possible. probable.

COCA COLA! taylor saw snl's skit of him, and he thought it was awesome.

3) taylor - "you send me" by sam cooke. GREAT song choice. i think rod said balls. i think. the song can get repetitive, but it is a GREAT song. and taylor does a great job singing it. no inappropriate (for the song) spastic dancing, and clean and crisp vocals. i know i'm not that good with it, but i think he was spot on for the whoel song. oh, there's the dancing. nvm. lol. it was stillfitting, though. randy's blown away tonight. paula rambles. simon thought, after a lame cabaret start to it, it was magic.

4) elliot - "it had to be you" by frank sinatra. now HE looks REAL snazzy. he really is a great vocalist, despite admitting to frequent karaoke bars. or is it because? hmmm... again, a GREAT, classy performance. it's HOT tonight! randy thought it was very nice "baby". paula rambles. simon thought the performance lacked in personality, and is slightly concerned for him.

5) kellie - "bewitched, bothered, and bewildered" by ella fitzgerald. she's kinda dumb. lol. but REALLY cute. she looks great! now THAT was boring. i mean, vocally it was good, but it just went no where, and just drudged along. i dunno. the ending was sort of painful. i dunno. before randy started, she said she butchered it. lol. randy thought it was pitchy. paula rambles. simon says the song was boring, and it didn't suit her. she apologizes, pouts and agrees it wasn't great. CUTE! and then, when ryan says you can't do a take two, she says she won't ut us through the torute. CUTE!

6) ace - "that's all" by nat king cole. he's got his hair slicked back. very gangsta/mobsta looking. he whipped out the ol' falsetto tonight. i hate it. the whoel performance was good, but nothing to write hime about. not worst, i mean, there was kellie, but second worse. randy says he worked it out, and loved the falsetto. huh? paula rambles. and is in love. simon thought it wasn't bad. ace screams of joy. simon thought it was nasaly in the middle, but very charming.

7) katharine - "someone to watch over me" by frank sinatra. rod thinks she was born to sing standards. and says she's fantastic. and he's right. again, a GREAT performance. other than kellie and ace, sort of, everyone were great tonight! awesome! the performance was actually one of her best. very subdued, with quiet confidence, as a certain drunk judge might say. randy thinks this is her element. he loved it and called it excellent. paula rambles. simon thinks she made the others looks like average amatures, and that it was in a different league.

one of the best eisodes. EVER.

1. katharine
2. chris
3. elliot
4. taylor
5. paris
6. ace
7. kellie

American Idol S05E29 - Top 8 Results

2009-06-29T04:33:00.002+03:00

8... 7...

paula's drunk. and ryan calls simon the grumpiest millioner he ever met. and simon says he can pretend to be sincere like ryan, and then tells him to be quiet. lol.

recap. ryan proceeds to belt out cheesey lines from queen songs.

GROUP SONG: queen medley, in the backgroun we see a recap of the season. "a kind of magic", "one vision", "killer queen", "another one bites the dust", "under pressure", "don't stop me now", "you're my best friend", "we are the champions". FINALLY, we get a group performance.

FORD! "hit me with your best shot" by pat benatar. they're golfing for a ford. wow. and it's the first time ace wore pink. yeah, right. and ryan did that many many times. of course.

taylor misses southern cooking. kellie misses oprah. paris misses fried chicken. elliot misses friends and family. and he cries. ace misses playing with his brothers. bucky misses something, but no one understood him. kat misses her dog. chris misses his wife and kids, and they're in the audience. we see tapes from the parents (kellie's grandpa) wishing them stuff. elliot's REALLY crying now.

we learn rod stewart, do ya think i'm sexy?, will mentor the idolites next week, and perform in the results show, and the theme will be the great american song book. woohoo!

we see taylor's bandmates, and his fish. and he's safe. kat lives 20 minutes away, and her dad cries when she sings. and she cries. ryan gives her a tissue. she's safe. chris' family's got a DEEP southern accent. we see chris with long(-ish) hair! ha! he's safe. kellie's got the snotrug. huh? she's never heard of tmi. lol. some banter from her grandpa and brother(?). she's safe. lol! she puts the snotrag on the results, and ryan's puzzeled about how to continue. lol! elliot's mom tells us he has allergies, and we are told how they found out about his diabetes. awww.... he's bottom 3. awww... and they surprise him, and make him sing. ace's brothers used to hit him. A LOT. he's bottom 3. this is turning out to be quite long... he's going to sing, too. bucky's city lost ther racetrack. or sumtin. paris' got some wierd two school thing, and she wanted to be a gynocologist. she cries. bucky's bottom 3. paris' safe. bucky sings.

simon thinks ace's history. ryan just gets to the point. and bucky's outta here! elliot and ace are safe. we see bucky's journey on idol.

American Idol S05E28 - Top 8

2009-06-29T03:23:00.002+03:00

8... ryan asks if anyone will be able to live up to freddie mercury. well, we KNOW they won't, so why bring that up?

QUEEN! I LOVE THEM! we see the top 8 meet the queen, or what's left of them. I LOVE QUEEN!

1) bucky - "fat bottomed girls". GREAT SONG. and quite a good song choice for bucky. as i suspect will be the case for all the songs tonight, it wasn't as good as the original (duh), AND it was major fun! forget the comparisons for a second, and it was quite a good performance. me likey. and you could understand what he was singing. randy liked the energy, heard pitchiness, but liked it. paula rambles. simon liked the song choice, thought the song was bigger than him, and would classify it as mediocre.

COCA COLA! ace says it's intense.

2) ace - "we will rock you". brian may was nervous about ace's arrangement ideas, and admited he can't do that to his song. lol. and he was right. the arrangement was really bad. and he seemed behind the music for most of the song. he got into a bit towards the end, but overall it is yet another weak performance from ace. randy was worried, and ranked it about a 5 or a 6. yep. paula rambles. simon thought randy was generous, and that it was a complete and utter mess. "we will rock you gently". lol. he REALLY hated it. i don't think it was that bad. not good, but not THAT bad.

3) kellie - "bohemian rhapsody". what is the poor country girl doing? NO, NO, NO, NO, NO! queen loves her. no pressure, as ryan said. kellie's turned into a biker chick! ah! the lighting was TERRIBLE at the start, trying to mimick bo's dream. the arrangement was kinda icky, and threw me off when it jumped from one part to another. again, not as good as the original, not as good as constance, not particulary good either, but fun. randy was worried, he loves the jacket, and thought she worked it out. paula rambles. simon calls her brave. he kinda agrees with randy and paula. he thinks it worked. he has a point, that people expected to suck, and it didn't. he also tried to explain what on paper means, and said "just, forget it". lol.

4) chris - "innuendo". queen thought chris is great. well, he's back to the harder rock. that's not entirely good. he still sounds great, and does a good job, but not a lot of "non-mainstream-nay-sayers" will like it. i did. didn't love it, but it was good. randy was expecting big things, and thinks chris delivered, not before reaking chris and paula out. paula's drunk, delusional, high and she rambles. simon says it's not a very good song. he thought it was the best so far, but thought he could have had a "moment" tonight, if he had chosen a better song. did chris steal ryan's beard?

5) katharine - "who wants to live forever". i LOVED her original song choice. a LOT more than her new one. i would have loved to see her run around the stage. :( again with the fancy lighting. and i was right. one of her absolut worst performances. not a clunker, per se, but she's so much better than that. not really good. randy thought it was a good idea to switch the song. NO. it was pitchy for him. paula rambles. simon thought it was almost the "moment". he thought it was one of the strongest tonight. did someone sip from paula's "water" bottle?

COCA COLA! elliot couldn't keep a job. he was a dj in a radio station. he looked high. and he gives us a taste of what it was like to listen to him.

6) elliot - "somebody to love". it was written with aretha in mind? i didn't know that... GREAT song choice. i think simon might call this the "moment". it was great. really, really good. that, and him being in the bottm 3 last week, he should be safe. REALLY great. actually, one of his best performances. not as good as freddie was on the song, OBVIOUSLY, but he still did a great job. paula's screaming. randy thought it was the hardest song to sing, heard some pitchy problems, but he loved him and thought it was really really good. paula rambles. simon thought overall he probably pulled it off.

7) taylor - "crazy little thing called love". he first thought doing we are the champions. but he wanted to do the spastic dancing, so he changed the song. his suit matched his hair. lol. LOL! he tried to kick the mic stand, missed, and then kicked it. LOL! the dancing's back! yay! the best PERFORMANCE of the night, by a mile, and the vocals were very good too. i LOVED it! randy's glad taylor's back, and thinks it was hot. paula rambles. simon asks if taylor's drunk, and he thought it was ridiculous. ryan says someone's drunk at the judges' table. well, duh...

8) paris - "the show must go on". brian said: "the things about paris, is that she's damn good". lol! did you see the crown on the belt? get it? queen? there were some wierd hand gestures. but damn, girl can SANG! vocally, probably the best tonight, but she jumped up and down at one point, and urged us to come one, so that hampered it, just a little, for me. randy thought she worked it out in the end. paula rambles. and she's drunk. and high. simon found it wierd. and that's it. lol.

1. taylor
2. elliot
3. paris
4. chris
5. bucky
6. katharine
7. kellie
8. ace

American Idol S05E27 - Top 9 Results

2009-06-29T02:16:00.003+03:00

9... 8...

recap

kenny rogers is here, and he's going to perform. should i be excited?

GUEST SONG: "i can't unlove you" by kenny rogers. well, duh... or should i say dull? hmmm...

FORD! "just one look" by doris troy, and they "fix" kellie's ride.

next week's theme's queen! this will either rock you, or be TERRIBLE. we see the contestants practicing with what's left of queen. WOOHOO!

to the results, and the return of the stupid groups thing. taylor goes near. mandisa goes middle. elliot joins mandisa. paris joins mandisa and elliot. ace goes far. kellie joins taylor. chris joins taylor and kellie. kat and bucky join ace. so, which group's bottom 3?

taylor, kellie and chris are safe. paula's about to burst out laughing. i just noticed ryan's still got the beard. hmmm... bucky, kat and ace are safe. the bottom 3's mandisa elliot and paris. paris' safe. simon thinks elliot will stay. and he's right. mandisa's outta here! elliot's safe. there's shock in the studio! AH! whatever... we see man diva's journey on idol. she sings.

American Idol S05E26 - Top 9

2009-06-29T01:24:00.003+03:00

9... single digits, whoopee... ryan's got a beard. why does ryan have a beard? someone, PLEASE, tell me why does ryan have a beard??? WHAT does randy have on???

and it's country night! yay... and kenny rogers helps the idol hopefuls.

1) taylor - "take me home, country roads" by john denver. i somewhat miss the crazy dancing. it was kinda hard to hear him at oints, as he was drowned out by the backup vocals and the band. it was too fast. i don't know if they sped it up, but it was too fast. randy thought the vocals were just ok. and he missed the personality. paula rambles. simon called it safe, boring AND lazy. he thought it didn't look/sound rehersed. and then ryan called simon's life safe boring and lazy. lol.

for some reason, someone tells ryan he loves him.

2) mandisa - "any man of mine" by shania twain. kenny wants her to articulate. she looked like an elephant with a dress! seriously! i'm not trying to diss her weight or anything, though she is BIG, but that's what it looked like! and the singing wasn't good. *NOTE rachel bilson's HOT!* randy didn't like the song choice, but he liked th last 5 seconds. paula rambles. simon thought the song was horrible. he thought it was fun and cutesy, but he liked the 4 seconds after it ended.

LOL! ryan tries to insult simon, in a playful and funny way, so simon responds to him: "with respect, i'm not the one trying to look like someone from desperate housewives. loose the beard". LOL! and ryan tries to save face with some baby blue comments. and he lets us know that SOMEONE in the judges' table's got a flask. does his/HER name start with a PAULA????

3) elliot - "if tomorrow never comes" by garth brooks. it was kinda slow and boring, and somewhat safe of a song choice, but he sang it well. i dunno. i'm preplexed. maybe if someone hit him in the face, REALLY REALLY hard, it will be more pleasant to look at. and then we'd all like him a lot. randy loves the song, and drops a name. he thought it was hot. paula rambles. simon liked the song choice, but not the really the vocals.

COCA COLA! remember when simon told diana the problem with her was the cutesy pootsy routine? in her original audition? paris' not just there, she's a senior citizen there.

4) paris - "how do i live" by leann rimes. i didn't like the song for her. and there was something wierd with her singing/enunciation. it was really off putting. but i dunno. it was alright. it was a'ight. it was ayight. it was ok. it was okay. i dunno. randy can tell it was tough for her. it was just a'ight for him. paula rambles. simon dosagrees with the rambler. he thought it was very good. i thought it was bleh. he heard early dionne warwick. huh?

5) ace - "tonight i wanna cry" by keith urban. kenny thought this was the best song choice, out of the nine. the start was kinda good, but from the middle part on, he was all over the place. well, not literally, there weren't little pieces of ace everywhere, but you know. and the falsetto to end it was SO forced, like he hopes that will save him. randy thought it was boring, but at least he brought the falsetto. paula rambles. and she's WRONG. simon thought it was a good song choice, and he was very good. and ryan lets us know ace is now single. yay...

COCA COLA! kellie's REALLY that naive!

6) kellie - "fancy" by reba mcentire. kenny loves her. she looks HAWT tonight! the song chocie was great. and the vocals weren't too shabby either! i liked it! quite a bit! finally, her accent fits the song. AND, she sang about na arlen, so randy will love it. randy thought it was great, and said it's her night. paula rambles. simon hated the song, but thought hte performance was very good. he also said the same thing he told carrie last season in country week, that it would have been a shock if she didn't get it right tonight.

whoopi and chris rock are in the audience.

7) chris - "making memories of us" by keith urban. his whole family listens to country. finally, chris breaks his own mold, and returns to the mold of everyone else. i know it's wierd, but it's good to hear him do something that others might consider safe, and not rock it out to creed or something. it was very good. randy liked him not rockin' too. paula rambles. simon agrees with randy too, but he thought it was boring. paula's now HAMMERED!

8) katharine - "bringing out the elvis" by faith hill. she loves country, but she doesn't sing it a lot. didn't lindsey sang something similar last season? again, good to see her doing something different. it wasn't as good as the ballad/jazzy songs she's performed, or at least some of those, but it was still good. randy calls her dawg, and thought she did a good job. paula rambles. simon called the song peculiar. kat makes him say he just doesn't like country.

9) bucky - "best i ever had (grey sky morning)" by vertical horizon. i think, i THINK, he was sharp to being with, and then went flat. it was just alright. kinda boring. i dunno. it was a'ight. randy called it pitchy, but alright. paula rambles. simon admits he's not an expert on some sort of music! ah! it was ok for him.

1. elliot
2. chris
3. kellie
4. katharine
5. paris
6. taylor
7. bucky
8. ace
9. mandisa

American Idol S05E25 - Top 10 Results

2009-06-29T00:48:00.003+03:00

10... 9...

we see a week in the life of an idol contestant. or something. they got a "sneak peek" of the second ice age movie.

shakira and wyclef jean will perform tonight.

FORD! "give a little love" by bay city rollers (i think). oh god... this sucks...

GUEST SONG: "hips don't lie" by shakira and wyclef jean. is she a singer or a belly dancer? ugh... what has become of this show? paula's hot for anything with a rod and a pulse. in that order.

recap

and to the results! mandisa, chris, kellie, taylor and paris are safe. elliot's safe. lisa's bottom 3. AGAIN! ace's bottom 3. AGAIN! katharine's bottom 3. SHOCKER! bucky's safe.

ace's safe. simon says katharine's being there doesn't surprise him. kat looks disgusted. lisa's outta here! kat's safe. we see lisa's journey on idol. she sings.

American Idol S05E24 - Top 10

2009-06-28T05:07:00.003+03:00

10...

2000s? haven't they learned from past mistakes? ugh...

1) lisa - "because of you" by kelly clarkson. why the FUCK would she do that to herself??? it was vocally sufficient and all, but in comparison, IT SUCKED!!!!!!!! it was just a'ight for randy. paula rambles. simon thought the song was too big for her. he says it was painful at times, and she makes a pouting face. HE'S RIGHT!!!!

2) kellie - "suds in the bucket" by sara evans. the intro clip was kinda cute. it fit her really, REALLY well. the song was silly. it was alright, but the big note, right before the last run, was way out of place. the song kinda sucked, actually. randy liked the country, but didn't get the song choice. paula rambles. simon HATES the song choice. kellie's so cute when she apologizes.

3) ace - "drops of jupiter (tell me)" by train. was that supposed to be rock?am i the only one that thought "drift away"? it was, at points, REALLY similar. it was alright. HAND GESTURES!!! ARGH!!!! i dunno. randy didn't like it, not the song choice and not the singing. paula rambles. the show gets a BIT personal and OFF CAMERA!!! when paula asks ace about a scar. simon thought it wasn't a great vocal, and that it was quite karaoke. i tend to agree.

COCA COLA! a 10 yr old kid has grey hair. we learn about the teachings of the soul patrol.

4) taylor - "trouble" by ray lamontagne. he kept the fidgeting to a minimum. i don't think it made him sound better, but it didn't really have a negative effect on the vocals, either. about those vocals - they were very good. not great, but very good. randy had problems with the song, and thought it was just alright. paula rambles. simon liked the song, thought it was an excellent vocal, but he has a problem with the styling. RYAN'S FUNNY! LOL!

5) mandisa - "shackles (praise you)" by mary mary. her speaking introduction for the song SUCKED! and it was so preach-y, i hated it! and it put a black mark on her performance. i quite liked the song. and she performed well enough, but the performance time is for performing, not delivering the teachings of christ! i don't like her... randy didn't like the song choice. paula rambles. and she talks blasphemy! it was a bit indulgent for simon.

COCA COLA! chris gives credit where credit's due, and admits he did live's version of "i walk the line". and we hear some banter about wether he would sing love songs.

6) chris - "what if" by creed. man this episode sucks... it was TOO heavy for most viewers, robably. but, given my wide and eclectic (i think that's the right word for it) tase in music, i REALLY liked it! one of his worst performances, sure, but still the best tonight. just goes to show you how good he's been. randy liked the song choice, FINALLY! he thinks he was sharp for most of the song. paula rambles. simon's gonna be negative, and chris corrects him that he's been negative towards him in the past. lol. he says it was indulgent, and that creed won't be caught dead on this show. lol! and he's right in saying he got too far with it, and that he needs to show more musical diversity.

7) katharine - "the voice within" by christina aguilera. she now has a weekly message for us? the vest-sort-of top was hideous! it was in a to high a key to be REALLY enjoyable. BUT, she did a GREAT job with the song, and i liked it, though hated the song. randy thought it was a good song choice, but not original. paula rambles. simon thinks it was the best tonight, and that it was almost as good as xtina.

8) bucky - "real good man" by tim mcgraw. he picked this song because he liked it, and it's right up his alley. he goes out with a cowby hat and shirt. just, don't... again, he does a relatively good job with a poor song. they keep saying that when they get out of the competition they gotta compete on the charts, but all these songs on these 2000s shows SUCK! randy thought it was right up his alley. paula rambles. simon thought it was ok, but would leave if he had payed to see that. yeah, right. that brit's so cheap he would stay all the way through, and demand 50 encores, until he decides it has been worth the price...

9) paris - "work it out" by beyonce. someone named aloha did it last season. i HATE this song. she did the obligatory dance moves, and they sucked. did i mention i hate this song? she whipped her hair at LEAST 9 or 10 times. the last run was bad. but all in all, it was a'ight. randy says it was fearless and da bomb. he thought it was the best tonight. huh? paula rambles. and she's drunk. simon thought it was precocious, and like a little girl pretending to be beyonce. the brit's right... this episode SUCKS!!!

10) elliot - "i don't want to be" by gavin degraw. he reminds us bo did it last year. stupid, stupid, stupid... but, he vibes and jazzes it up, and despite slipping up in the lyrics at the top of the song, he does a VERY good job! THAT was the best yet, and the best of the night. it IS the last one, so... paula shouts. she's drunk... randy wasn't sure about the arrangement, but elliot can sing. paula rambles. she called elliot a funky white boy. simon thought the song was great, the arrangement sucked, the vocals were good, and the dancing was terrible. lol.

1. elliot
2. katharine
3. chris
4. taylor
5. paris
6. kellie
7. bucky
8. mandisa
9. ace
10. lisa

American Idol S05E23 - Top 11 Results

2009-06-28T04:24:00.002+03:00

11... 10...

recap

FORD! the top 11 go to the beach, and sing "we got the beat" by the go-go's, and chicken little gets buried in the sand.

barry's in da house! he's gonna sing, too!

GUEST SONG: "love is a many splendored thing", from his album of 50s covers. bobby's in the audience, the copacabana guy, everybody's laughing at him as he is overjoyed. and he gets to go on stage and hug barry.

on to the results! ace's safe. mandisa's safe. elliot's safe. kellie doesn't know what ballsy means. lol. she's safe. chris' safe. *NOTE: apparently, his "original" arrangement of "i walk the line" wasn't so original, as it was taken from live's version of the song. oh, wel...* paris' safe. kat's safe. taylor's safe. so that leaves just kevin, lisa and bucky, and they are the bottom 3.

lisa's not in the bottom 2, so she's safe. paula rambles. and she's drunk. she rambles. bucky's safe. kevin's outta here! oh! awww! we see his journey on idol. he sings again, as ryan asks him to sit on the front of the stage agan, so he has to run, to make it in time for his mark. lol!

American Idol S05E22 - Top 11

2009-06-28T02:34:00.003+03:00

11...

and tonight, they'll sing to the sounds of the 50s! this can actually be good! and barry manilow is, again, a mentor for the idolettes. "fan-ilows"? SERIOUSLY??? the top 11 went to lv to meet barry, and get some advice from him. he also helped arrange the songs.

1) mandisa - "i don't hurt anymore" by dinah washington. barry admits mandisa had a better idea of how to arrange the song. i have to admit, i'm not a fan of mandisa. but this performance, i liked. i think it's more the song than her singing, though it was admittedly good. the a capella part of the ending was bad, for me, but overall very good. randy's speechless. he thought it was a great, classy, amazing way to start the night. paula rambles. she talked about horses, escaping and chairs. simon says mandisa's blossoming, and thought it was a very sexy performance. he "absolutely LOVED it". man-diva? as in a male diva? ugh...

2) bucky - "oh, boy!" by buddy holly. barry thought the song was repetitive, so they changed the song up. the start was decieveing, and i was expecting a faster song. i'm disappointed. it was a bit repetitive. and not good, at all. the falsetto at the end was just plain wrong. randy loves the song choice, and thought the falsetto at the end was cool. paula rambles. simon called it a pointless karaoke performance. not karaoke, but POINTLESS karaoke. i sorta understand where simon's coming from.

3) paris - "fever" by peggy lee. some talk about age. i dunno. she did in hollywood, i think. damn. that was her best performance, EVER! it was SO good! i got nuthin' else to say 'bout it. randy thought she blew it out the box. huh? paula rambles. simon says this is what she says best. not paula and rambling, paris and these sort of songs.

4) chris - "i walk the line" by johnny cash. hmmm... i would have picked a different song... chris knocked barry out. seriously. and then barry called him baby. seriously. the start was somewhat odd. but the rest of it was great! if he arranged it alone, he's a very creative rocker! yeah, i tried to compliment the arrangement, but it didn't work. not his best, but still very good! and he showed he can do more slow-er as well as fast rock type of songs. i LOVED it. paula's screaming. randy's voice is SHOT! he thought it wasn't his best, but loved the arrangement. and, apparently, chris is ready. paula rambles. simon doesn't think it matters that it wasn't a great vocal. he thinks he's the first idol contestant that won't compromise. sounds about right. constance's in da house... and he's got glasses... ugh...

COCA COLA! kat saw simon and his gf on tv, or sumthin...

5) katharine - "come rain or come shine" by ella fitzgerald. she thinks barry's awesome. oh, and he's also awesome. a very classy, and really good, performance from kat. for some reason, i'm having problems concentrating on tonight's show. i dunno. not randy's fave, but he thinks it was really really song, and she worked it out. paula rambles. simon thinks she turned into a star tonight. he LOVED it.

6) taylor - "not fade away" by boddy holly and the crickets. a great song, made even greater by the rolling stones, quite early on in their career. barry did something to the ending. PERFECT song choice. even with the spastic dancing. bringing out the sax player was nice. i think they could have arranged the song A LOT better, but he did a very nice job with it. paula's screaming. randy thought he worked it out, and he loves him. paula rambles. simon thought it was a complete mess. simon points out that paula's talking rubbish. paula's DRUNK!

COCA COLA! lisa talks about being in the bottom 3. i think.

7) lisa - "why do fools fall in love?" by frankie lymon and the teenagers. the original is just SO annoying. barry was digging it when she sang. wow that sucked. the song really didn't fit her. it wasn't terrible, but there wasn't a single thing about it that was good. i really don't like her. randy thought it was a good song choice, but it was just alright. paula rambles. simon thought it was ok, but at times tonight he feels he's in a high school musical. paula's DRUNK!

8) kevin - "when i fall in love" by nat king cole. i know SOMONE did this song already. he get's all sappy when talking about the song choice. barry wanted to innocentify the song. this style of music fits him so much better than what he did last week. but he looks so awkward. the singing was very good, but the performance was horrid! randy sees himself in him. paula rambles. simon likes him, and he likes simon.

COCA COLA! elliot talks about something.

9) elliot - "teach me tonight" by the decastro sisters. barry tries to teach alliot about backphrasin. ryan introduced him as elliot "yummy". elliot's not a good student. i dunno. it was good. i dunno. randy thought he chose the toughest song, and he worked it out, despite some rough spots. paula rambles. simon says it was fantastic. i say, i dunno.

10) kellie - "walkin' after midnight" by patsy cline. her grandpa told her to do patsy cline. barry tried to teach about understanding and conveying the lyrics. she's got TOO MUCH make up on. but the outfit was cute. she sounded french at times. i knowit's wierd, but she did! i was impressed by the pickler. it was, arguably, one of, if not her best performance. randy says she gave a good performance, and that she back. paula rambles. simon thinks she got it absolutely right, and it was just great.

11) ace - "in the still of the night" by the five satins. barry was worried about doing a jazzy version. i agree. the arrangement was eh. the singing was eh. the first clay imitator that made it to the semi-finals was better at it. it was just average, and that's not good enough. and again with that horrible falsetto. ugh. paula's screaming. she's drunk. randy thinks he's back. paula's drunk. she rambles.

1. katharine
2. mandisa
3. elliot
4. chris
5. paris
6. kellie
7. taylor
8. kevin
9. ace
10. lisa
11. bucky

American Idol S05E21 - Top 12 Results

2009-06-28T02:08:00.002+03:00

12... 11...

32.5 million votes? eh, i've seen better... MAN CLEAVAGE! on cowell... UGH!

recap

FORD! chris plays guitar. everyone's camping. someone's in a monster suit. kat's a co. ace was the one in the monster suit. the song was "all i want" by someone... i dunno...

stevie's in da house! and he's gonna perform!

GUEST SONG: "my love is on fire" by stevie wonder. well, duh... t's from his new album, a time to love. now THAT's how you sing a stevie song! lol...

some guys from some show called the loop are in the audience.

now, to the results. either ace or kevin's bottom 3, the other's safe. ace's bottom 3. kevin's safe. paula doesn't get it. paris' safe. kellie's safe. taylor's safe. chris' safe. either melissa or elliot's bottom 3, the other's safe. melissa's bottom 3. elliot's safe. mandisa's safe. kat's safe. either lisa or bucky's bottom 3, the other's safe. lisa's bottom 3. bucky's safe.

the bottom 3's ace, melissa and lisa. ace's safe. everybody screams. lisa's safe. melissa's outta here! we see her journey on idol. she sings.

American Idol S05E20 - Top 12

2009-06-28T00:08:00.002+03:00

12! 12! 12!

stevie wonder... stevie wonder... stevie wonder...

we see the top 12's jourrney to... the top 12... the theme's tonight is stevie wonder. WHY!?!?!?!?!? and he met the top 12, and we see him meeting them.

1) ace - "do i do". ace cries when he talks about meeting stevie. didn't mario did it last season? yes, he did, and it was as good. in all actuallity (is that even a word?), it wasn't good, like at all. just... not that good. randy heard pitch problems, thought it was just a'ight, but liked the performance skills. paula's drunk, and thought he put everything into it. simon says he's lucky the audience is easily pleased, and called it a bit manic.

2) kellie - "blame it on the sun". she's not really familiar with stevie songs. she's SO cute! the dress is classy, but the hair/face looks wierd tonight. the accent is just so wrong for these kinds of songs. it was pretty bad. even worse than ace. randy called it a non-event, and it didn't work for him. he LOVES the shoes, though. paula's drunk. she called the song too safe, and missed the "razzle dazzle". simon says everything went wrong tonight, it was really boring, and something about the look and dolly parton. i dunno. kellie apologizes. lol! some funny "fake eyelashes" banter with ryan follows.

3) elliot - "knocks me off my feet". he REALLY cried when he sat and sang with stevie. he sing THAT song, sitting on a stool. GET IT??? HUH??? HUH??? something sounded wierd. i don't know if it's the song, or the singing, but something sounded odd. he's BUTT UGLY. by the middle of the song it got better, and the ending was really good. best yet, but that a'int hard. randy didn't think it was his best, cause he didn't really bring anything new to the song. paula loved that he cried next to stevie. and she kept on rambling. simon thinks it didn't have the wow factor, but still was best yet.

COCA COLA! mandisa says it's intense, and she wants to bring her a-game. and her feet hurt. she's gonna perform bare feet. and ryan talks about her ankles.

4) mandisa - "don't you worry 'bout a thing". she says stevie is "kind of a staple". when they all sang with stevie, she crouched under the piano. ??? the start was kinda off, in some way. it was good, but something was missing. i don't know what, but i wasn't feeling it. randy thought she had better performances, but it was the best so far. paula says she can sing anything. simon also thinks it's the best so far. i guess it was kinda good...

5) bucky - "superstition". he's never really listened to stevie songs. but, after listening to the song he's gonna do, he wants to buy all his albums. the movement was a bit awkward. his timing was off at times, but it was interesting! which is more than you can say about most performances so far. he sang to hard, like randy told him after his first performance. randy liked the song choice. he thought it wasn't the greatest vocal performance, but he enjoyed it. paula enjoyed hearing him singing stevie, and thinks he was really good. simon thought it was one of his best. but thinks his hair style was "jessica simpson"-esque. some odd hair banter follows.

COCA COLA! something about something. and olive oil.

6) melissa - "lately". she messed the lyrics infront of stevie. and he was funny! lol! and she tells us to watch out, "'cause here comes melissa in a dress". who? and she FUCKED THE LYRICS UP, AGAIN! AND BIG TIME! AND TWICE! and she changed "i'm a man of many wishes" to "i have many many wishes"! and she effed up again! and even when she sang the right words, it didn't sound good. BAD... and dull. randy thinks she can sing. paula thinks she's beatiful. and there's something soothing about her voice, and she did a really nice job. simon thought it was her best performance so far. huh? she keeps apologizing about messing the words.

7) lisa - "signed, sealed, delivered i'm yours". she too cried when she met stevie. and she'll try to do him proud. the band was too loud for her. the arrange,ent wasn't good. the high note in the middle was TERRIBLE! but overall, it was ok. kinda fun, but then again not (really). randy thought the hottest part was the end. paula's psychic. and she rambles. simon thought it was one of the best tonight. he thought it was great, and he loved it. HUH???

COCA COLA! kevin loves the fans that have kevin signs. and he gets one.

8) kevin - "part-time lover". he was a "bit" nervous when he met stevie. he tries to makes thesong "sexy", and says something about being the sex symbol this season. he's just so dorky! it was really funny hearing him sing this song. it wasn't good, by any means, but it was definitely entertaining. the performing part SUCKED! lol! randy's laughing. he loves him, and keeps laughing. he didn't expect him to sing in tune and well. KEVIN'S WEARING MAKEUP!!! AAAHHH!!! he thought it was definitely anjoyable. paula loves that stevie wanted to squish him. paula's pround. i think. simon thought it was appalling. LOL! to that, kevin responds he wasn't expecting much from him any how. LOL!

9) katharine - "until you come back to me". she was in awe when stevie entered the room. stevie thinks aretha wouldn't mind her singing it, and knows stevie doesn't mind. her look is wierd. the higher parts were either off or wierd, i'm not sure which. but the performance, as a whole, was really good! i liked it! a lot! randy thinks she was off the chain, and it was hot, and she was da bomb. paula rambles. simon says she's good. and she's starting to remind him of kelly.

10) taylor - "living for the city". he says stevie is an american idol, and as a kid he tried to play harmonica like stevie. GREAT song choice for him. i missed the throaty "for the citaaaaaaaay" of the original. there was a break in the singing that was way too long. and he does the whole spastic dancing. still. there wasn't nearly enough singing in those 90 secs. BUT, it was really good! not his best, and not the best tonight, but really good! randy loved that it was hot, and he was fearless. paula loves the parkinson's dance moves. simon says his appeal is that he's like every dad that's got drunk on a wedding and sang, but the difference is he can sing. OMG! that was SPOT ON! ryan heard a rumor that a hair stylist wanted to change taylor's hair color. taylor doesn't want to reveal anything. ha. ha. ha.

11) paris - "all i do". she too cried when she sang for stevie. stevie sees a great future for her. the start was the best part, and it got a bit worse after that, but it stayed quite good. not as good as her train to georgia, and not the best tonight, but still pretty good. randy thought she was unbelieveable. paula calls her a seasoned veteran. SHE'S 17! simon thought the first half of the night was alright, and the second half brilliant. he says the performance was very good. and she keeps singing as ryan asks her questions. that's annoying. then ryan sings. that's funny.

12) chris - "higher ground". THIS is a stevie song? i thought it was a red hot chili peppers number... yeah, laugh all you want! YEAH! chris was worried about finding a good song for him.chris also wasn't aware this is a stevie song, but he heard the rhcp version. YEAH! and he's going to try and mix both version. AWESOME! BRILLIANT! TERRIFIC! randy calls him baby. he thinks it's cool that every week he makes it his own. and he worked it out. paula never worries. that's the drugs, probably. smon says "thank god for chris". nuff said. again he said it's the only real world performance, and that it was the best tonight, by a mile.

1. chris
2. katharine
3. taylor
4. mandisa
5. paris
6. bucky
7. elliot
8. lisa
9. kevin
10. ace
11. kellie
12. melissa

American Idol S05E19 - Top 16 Results

2009-06-27T05:48:00.002+03:00

the most dramtic cut until the top 4. 16 are here, 12 move on, and 4 get cut.

recap of the girls' and guys' performances.

BO'S IN DA HOUSE!

GUEST SONG: "the real thing" by bo bice. he's still walking with the mic stand. and, is THIS the real thing? soft rock, with conditioned hair? where's whipping post? vehicle? free bird? sweet home alabama? IN A DREAM!?!?!?!?!?

we hear what the judges think about each one of the girls, one at a time. lisa's safe, for now. melissa's safe, for now. ayla's safe, for now. kinnik's outta here! she sings.

on to the guys! again, the judges' commentary. kevin's safe, for now. gedeon's safe, for now. rocky, i mean bucky, is safe, for now. elliot's safe, for now. will's outta here! he sings. and he's better than the other night, actually!

paris' in the top 12. she screams. kat's top 12. she's happy. kellie's top 12. ryan speaks southern. mandisa's top 12. and she's happy. lisa's top 12. so either melissa or ayla will be in the top 12. melissa's top 12. she screams. ayla's outta here. she cries. and she never cries! everyone's applauding her. she sings.

taylor's top 12. he WHOOO's. ace's top 12. chris' top 12. he screams. kevin's top 12. he's shocked. everybody cheers. THE BRITTENUM TWINS ARE IN DA HOUSE! i hate them... elliot's top 12. he's happy. bucky's top 12. gedeon's outta here (yay!). he sings.

we see the four that didn't make it's journeys on idol. then we get a reminder of who the top 12 are.

American Idol S05E18 - Top 16: Top 8 Guys

2009-06-27T04:56:00.002+03:00

8 guys, 6 spots, 2 are out.

1) gedeon - "when a man loves a woman" by percy sledge. he paints. i REALLY hate him, and the way he talks... "IT". "IT". "IT". he's about to swallow the mic! i just hate him. the last run was BAD. but overall it was a'ight. not my fave for him, but he'll need to do a lot, A LOT, for me to consider anything he does as a fave. randy thought it was a'ight, and he did his thing. paula says he's unique. simon says he's quite odd. he thought it was a bit cabaret and over the top. he also likes him. ugh. GROSS!!!!!! gedeon says there are many women in his life and he loves all of them, and that's why he picked the song. "i love my mother, and my grandmother...". GROSS!!!!!!!!!!!

as ryan walks across the line of guys, the give him horns. lol!

2) chris - "broken" by seether. once his receding hairline (bays, in hebrew) was too much, he decided to just shave the whole thing off. good for him! he's like the bo bice of (non-southern) rock. that's a REALLY good thing, if you were wondering. just another, really good, consistent performance. randy loves he knows where he is, and he did his thing. he ended his "critique" with something like you did your thing. paula thinks he'll be selling stadiums or whatnot. simon thought it was indulgent, and he should try and appealt to a wider audience.

3) kevin - "vincent" by don mclean. after the meltdown clay had, why would anyone choose this song?!?!? kanye west is one of his fave artist, and he enjoys rapping to his music. lol. his jaw moves forward when he sings, and it is somewhat alarming in its oddity. i never thought i'd say it, but he was better than clay! it was a very nice, pleasant performance. paula's overwhelmed with sticky feelings. randy "knew" he was hip-hop, and kevin plays along. lol! randy thought it was very nice, and he liked it. paula wants to squish him into a little ball and shove him up her putang. simon compares him to puppies. and he thinks he's got the granny vote tonight. kevin says he'll take it. simon also called it juvenile, and ended it with "i'm not being rude".

LOL! ryan says he's had a dream about simon last night, to which simon replies he's not surprised. LOL! then ryan continues that he gives constructive criticisim. then there's some more funny banter. lol!

4) bucky - "wave on wave" by pat green. he's got a twin! an identical twin! named rocky! again, this song is totally up his alley. but like when carrie rocked out on non-country songs, i think he should take more chances, cause who knows, he might be really good in other genres too. that being said, one of his better performances. i know he only had three, but what else can i say about that performance? randy, again thinks he knows who he is. and he starts rambling. he liked it. paula loves that he's unpretencious. and he keeps it real. simon thought it was ok, and again bar-band-y. we get to meet rocky. they are IDENTICAL! OMG!

5) william - "how sweet it is (to be loved by you)" by james taylor. he takes japanese lessons! ha! and the 11 yr old girls reference! lol! this is more like his first song, and i think that's great. not that the performance was great, it was good/ok-ish, but this is so much better than the crooning bit, that i don't think is really him. he had a cross necklace on? PREACHER!!! i think this was his best performance. randy thought it wasn't good kinda bad karaoke. paula TOTALLY disagrees. and she's a fan. she thought he did a great job. simon says paula was starved of entertainment as a child. he calls it completely average.

6) taylor - "takin' it to the streets" by the doobie brothers. LOL! he used to be a bunny! LOL! he's still spastic. the performance, what with the wierd involuntary movements and all, SUCKED. it sucked so bad, it was fun! and the vocals were really good too! i LOVE it! so does paula, whose standing and screaming. randy thought it was a great song choice, and he represented the dawgpound. paula wants to steal his steps, and was blown away. simon thinks he can destroy the music video industry. LOL! he called it the best performance so far. ryan tries to imitatie him. i REALLY think, taylor's got tourette's, physicaly too.

7) elliot - "heaven" by bryan adams. he's 95% deaf in one ear. WOW. that's really impresive that he can sing really well and all, with just one good ear. can you imagine schumacher doing well with just one eye/hand/leg? or just 5% of those things? GREAT song. and good song choice for him. he's butt ugly though. it was REALLY good! paula's screaming. randy says it was hot! paula says he's phenomenal AND amazing, and spills her coke. i think she's drunk. again. simon thought it was a "cop out"? huh? he thought it was the wrong song, and that elliot felt disconected.

8) ace - "butterflies" by michael jackson. he's become quite the handyman. right. he wears the beanie this time, instead of putting itin his back pocket. it was too much like that terrible falsetto overdriven song way did a few weeks back. in other news, wacko jacko, michael jackson, passed away this week. sad, i know, but i'm sure a lot of parents, and maybe some kids, are relieved. i thought it was just a'ight, and i think it was too much of a copycat. randy thought it was hot. paula thought it was unbelieveable. simon thinks parts of the vocal weren't great, but he made it work.

1. taylor
2. chris
3. elliot
4. kevin
5. ace
6. bucky
7. william
8. gedeon

American Idol S05E17 - Top 16: Top 8 Girls

2009-06-27T03:57:00.003+03:00

8 girls, but only 6 make it to the top 12!

1) paris - "conga" by gloria estefan. her nickname's princess p, and she's a tomboy. REALLY bad song choice, for me, for her. but vocally it was good. so overall, it was a'ight. randy's on the same page as me, and i feel somewhat embarrased by that. paula prefers her on these uptempo songs. simon's glad she did a younger song, thinks that vocally it was ok, and thinks that we'll see her next week.

2) lisa - "here's where i stand" by tiffany taylor. she "absolutely loves jimi hendrix". HAND GESTURES! ARGH! she looks and sounds much older than she really is. again, while it was vocally sufficient, i didn't really care for it all that much... randy loves the jimi hendrix thing. he thinks the song was too old for her, and it was just alright. paula sees a seasoned performer, but wishes she would have sung a song they could get into. simon thinks the songs she sings sound like her mum's choosing them, but she'll sail through to the next round.

3) melissa - "what about love" by heart. she's a car freak. and she used to race with the boys in her school. SLUTTY! the look tonight, that is. if not for the hand gestures (ARGH!!!), i might have actually liked the performance. her "smokey" tone, i.e. the fact that she's kinda hoarse, really subtracted from my overall enjoyment of the singing. but it was pretty good. randy liked the song choice, and thought it was very nice. paula thinks she's improving every week, and she's a powerhouse. simon disagrees. he thinks the last note booked her ticket home, and she shouted the song.

COCA COLA! kat wants to have fun. me too! wth her and kellie! kat's not quitting the show. and she's not pregnant, and there's nothing between her and kevin, and kevin loves it/looks a bit disappointed. lol-ish.

4) kinnik - "if i ain't got you" by alicia keys. she loves hog intestines. gross. it was really pitchy, i think. and just overall poorly executed. everything from the oddly placed runs, to the arrangement, and the weak vocals. it was just bad. randy loves the song, but he doesn't think she nailed it. paula thinks she looks amazing, but she was off with her pitch. and then she shrugs. simon thinks she just messed it up, and she booked her plane ticket home.

5) katharine - "think" by aretha franklin. she went to the same school constance went to, and that's probably where she learned to do the smouldering look. the KELLY!!!! did aretha in her semifinal performance. and after you get over the initial awkwardness that is a skinny white girl singing this song, it was actually very good. better than diana when she sang it. and then she does a cute spin around. randy says we got a hot one, and i agree. paula says it's fun seeing her have fun. and then she rambles about some shit. and simon agrees with randy, and thinks she's gonna sail through. ryan's dream is to see simon do the randy "we got a hot one in hya" thing. we get some funny banter, about kat always saying the same thing, and how that's ok cause we got randy, and how she's "got you, dawg". lol!

6) ayla - "unwritten" by natasha bedingfield. she thought the her dad was elvis presley. HUH? she was VERY confused as a child. her hairdo is wierd. her performance isn't. it's actually very good. love that song for her, and in general. except for some wierd hand gestures here and there, the performance was very good too. i REALLY liked it! randy thought the song was ok, butit wasn't a singer's song, and it was alright. paula says she fights the fight and working her butt off. i swear to god. simon says it was pretty good. but he would like the young girl on the intro clips to be on stage. and it wasn't fantastic. ayla's SO much taller than ryan...

7) mandisa - "i'm every woman" by chaka khan. she sucked her thumb until she was 24!!! AAAAHHHHH!!!!!! the start was AWFUL! i hate hate HATE this song. it sounded a bit shouty at times, but overall it was a very good performance. paula stands up and shouts. randy:"yo! wow! alright, so, yo!". and after that he gives her a standing o. he says it's the best female vocal this season. i beg to differ. paula loved the arrangement, and says she sang her butt off (she didn't, really). simon says she made everyone that appeared before her seem ordinary. REALLY? was it that good??? oh, well...

8) kellie - "i'm the only one" by melissa etheridge. she LOOOOVES dogs. she's REALLY cute! anyone else find it cheesy that the background was flames, and she sings about being the only that would walk acroos the fire for someone? again, i REALLY liked it! it was very good! randy says she is always consistent. paula likes her movements, and says guys are in love with her. simon says she a naughty little minx. he really really likes her. he prefers her to CARRIE?!?!?!?!? if i didn't like kellie as much as i do, i would be outraged!!!! and i am! a bit! some funny banter about minxes, and kellie says "i'm a mink!". lol! and she had a salmon for the first time at lunch. lol! cute!

1. katharine
2. mandisa
3. kellie
4. ayla
5. melissa
6. paris
7. lisa
8. kinnik

American Idol S05E16 - Top 20 Results

2009-06-27T02:39:00.002+03:00

20 are cut down to 16, and CARRIE'S HERE! WOOHOO!

some millions of votes were phoned in. whateva...

GROUP SONG: "love the one you're with" by stephen stills, originally. it was a'ight, but mostly meh.

we get a recap of the girls' and guys' performances.

CARRIE'S HERE!!!! I LUV HER!!!! she misses the judges. we get the first of many guest performances this season, and from here on out, on idol. last season, other than in the finale, just fantasia performed, and the season before that, clay ruben and kimberley performed.

GUEST SONG: "jesus take the wheel" by carrie underwood. she's still great. she really improved her performing skills, too! and some of the contestants seemed to sing along with her, up in the balcony. lol!

the girls go first. we hear, one at a time, what the judges thought about each girl. apparently, ryan's looking for the bottom 3, this time round. lisa's safe. ayla's safe. kat's safe. mandisa's safe. kinnik's bottom 3. brenna's bottom 3. kellie's safe. paris' safe. heather and melissa are left. heather's bottom 3. melissa's safe. heather and kinnik sit down, as brenna's got the least amount of votes. YAY! she sings. boo... she really does suck...

kinnik and heather are back at center stage. paula's drunk, and says something about pizza and salad. everyone laughs. paula's DRUNK. simon thinks heather's outta here, and he's right. kinnik's safe. she's going home to her goats. huh? she sings.

now, it's the guys. again, the same thing with the judges' comments. bucky's safe. ace's safe. elliot's safe. sway's bottom 3. taylor's safe (whoo!). david's bottom 3. chris' safe. gedeon's cocky. he's safe. kevin's bottom 3 (awww...). will's safe. kevin and sway sit down. david's got the least number of votes. he sings.

kevin and sway are back at center stage. PAULA'S DRUNK! REALLY, REALLY, REALLY DRUNK! simon thinks sway's outta here, and he's right. kevin's safe. and sway sings. yay...

we see the four that were ousted's journeys on idol.

American Idol S05E15 - Top 20: Top 10 Guys

2009-06-27T00:59:00.004+03:00

10 guys, blah blah blah...

we get a recap of the girls' performances. we get some semi-amusing ryan/judges banter.

1) taylor - "easy" by the commodores. with a "tabogan??" off, it's like "ohhhhhhhh!!!!!". his movments on stage seem involuntairy at times. lol. didn't love the song on him, and it wasn't as good as "levon" last week, but it was still definitely good. randy heard pitch problems, but still likes him. taylor keeps doing "whoo"s. paula loves his outfit, but it wasn't her fave song choice. it didn't work for simon, again with the song choice, and thinks we should get out of the bubble. the first concert taylor went to was lionel richie, and he got a t-shirt from there, but says it's too tight, so ryan says he could be like simon. lol!

2) elliot - "moody's mood for love" by james moody. it's his brother's b-day. his mom was hospitalized during hollywood week. awww... the start was wierd... didn't a crooner last season, that didn't make it past hollywood, sang it in his audition? again, i don't like the song choice, but it was vocally very good. and again, not quite as good as he was last week. randy gives him a standing o (was it that good?). paula thought it was brilliant (i guess i was wrong?). simon thinks his confidence grows. about the song, he thinks he can't win with that song, but that it was a great performance (was i really that wrong?). as ryan gives his number, he's just standing there nodding. odd.

3) ace - "if you're not the one" by daniel bedingfield. he always has a beanie in his back pocket. is that like a tabogan? HAND GESTURES!!!!!! ARGH!!!!!! i would be more impressed if i was a chick, i guess. it was good, but not as good as last week OR as good as the first two tonight. the falsetto LOOKED painful for him, and SOUNDED painful for me. randy liked the falsetto, and thinks he's better than what we see/hear. paula's got special feelings for ace. it's like she wants to tie him up, shove him in her trunk, and just keep driving to a secluded place. simon thought he struggled with the song. and he refers to paula and randy as mozart and beethoven again, and to himself as naive or something.

4) gedeon - "a change is gonna come" by sam cooke. "IT". "IT". "IT". he forgot the name of the song and the lyrics to the group performance in hollywood. he's got a HYOOGE mouth, and tounge. HAND GESTURES!!! it was vocally good and all, like, really good, but i just wasn't feeling it. maybe it's my unlimited hatered towards the man and the "IT". "IT". "IT". i dunno... randy loves that he's a great natural performance. he also thought he was pitchy at the beginning. GEDEON'S 17-18??? he looks 40!!! paula thinks he's unique and different, and that he's awesome. simon calls him a funny little thing. he thinks his faces are wierd, but think he does that kind of music brilliantly. paula screams for joy. i'm creeped out by randy's love for shoes, and gedeon's smile.

5) kevin - "i heard it through the grapevine" by marvin gaye. ryan calls him "real gangsta" and does a chest bump with him. chicken little doing marvin gaye? pricleless! all of a sudden, he's a "sex symbol", and hundreds of girls think he's cute. he ends the intro clip with a "hey ladies, how you doin'?". lol! he looks so wierd doing that song. he kept looking for the right camera. i liked, if only for the difference between his image and the song's image, and seeing him trying to boogie. lol! paula's laughing and clapping. randy's laughing, and he really enjoyed it, he thinks he can actually sing. paula calls him infectious, and thinks he's the next sex symbol. she thought it was good too. simon thinks he's likeable, but if heard it on the radio he'd turn it off. ryan "found" his body double, chicken little. lol! and we get a split screen comparison. lol!

6) sway - "overjoyed" by stevie wonder. he tells some sob story about his family. can't he sing in a lower register? sound like a man, BITCH! now that was bad. pitchy throughout, bad runs, bad "stage presence", just bad. and HAND GESTURES! AH! i don't like this wierd hybrid. randy thought it wasn't as good as last week (the falsetto hyperdriven one), and that it wasn't good. paula feels he's disconected tonight. simon says it's exactly how NOT to do well on it, it was karaoke, and there was no originality. i say, what does it matter when he just plain out SUCKED?!?!?!?

7) william - "lady" by kenny rogers. he's from texas, apparently. and he met guarini, and thought it was really cool. the sing was too old for him. and the hand gestures. the "up beat"-ish part was better than the rest of the song. that being said, i REALLY liked it. aside from the last note, i think it was really good! paula's in love with a 16 year old. randy thought it was "basically alright", and he wasn't blown out. paula thinks he's got a good tone and he controls it right, but it was too safe. simon thought it was like an audition for "cats". he says he's target audience is 11 year old girls, and will's got a look of "damn, i want boobies on my groupies!". lol. simon thinks though that those 11 year olds will love it. ryan starts removing will's hirt, so that he'll throw down, to that simon tells will to "get off the stage, quick!". will bursts laughing. LOL!

8) bucky - "the thunder rolls" by garthe brooks. i literally can't understand a single word he's saying when he's talking. like kellie, he's overwhelmed by the food in la. at the start of the performance, we hear a thunder roll. talk about cheesy. i didn't like it as much as his "simple man". it was just a'ight, for me. at least he sorta listened to randy about singing too hard. sorta. paula's crying. randy thinks it's a great song choice, there were some pitch problems, but he did his thing. paula thought he's finding his place. parking place? seating place? what? simon thinks he's very sincere. but he comes over as a support-act, and not as a star attraction sort of singer. i sort of agree with simon. we get some amusing food banter between ryan and bucky. and then some laugh-at southern accent from ryan.

9) david - "the way you look tonight" by frank sinatra. he had no belt in his audition, so he wore a car phone charger. LOL! aaaaaand.. he's crooning again. didn't we learn anything from the disaster that was john stevens? didn't he already sang this song, at some point of the competition? as far as a croon song, it was alright, but there's no place for it on the idol. it's just wrong. it's like some hasidic jew will come and sing "hava nagila", or something. the ending was really nice. randy was really bored. paula's rambling. simon thought he lacked the charisma and confidence needed for those type of songs, and that it'd worked better with just a piano backing him.

10) chris - "hemorrhage (in my hands)" by fuel. that's got to be the wierdest song name ever on idol, right? his pose to start was really wierd. BRILLIANT. from the song, to the vocals, to the performing. BRILLIANT. BRILLIANT. BRILLIANT. BRILLIANT. BRILLIANT. BRILLIANT. randy "loved it, loved it, loved it, loved it". and then he screams "yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!". paula calls him amazing, after he says he only knows how good he is when they tell him. simon thinks this is the only performance that stands in the real world, and that it was in a dfferent class tonight. chris jumps up and down.

apparently, bo was in da house, but i didn't see him. booo...

1. chris
2. elliot
3. taylor
4. william
5. kevin
6. ace
7. bucky
8. david
9. gedeon
10. sway

American Idol S05E14 - Top 20: Top 10 Girls

2009-06-26T00:37:00.002+03:00

10 girls. 2 will be out.

simon would give his comments of last week a 10 out of 10. and he'd give paula and randy 6.25 out of 10. and he says they are wrong about 60% of the time. and paula says he bugs the hell out of her, and he's like the brother she never had. you kissed him! gross!

1) katharine - "all is fair in love" by stevie wonder. she and kellie are roomies, and the arey silly together. that's HOT! she looks either fat or pregnant. too much vibrato. disappointing, overall. you expect better from her. MUCH better. i mean, simon picked you to win! it wasn't good. it was just ok for randy. paula says she moves her. simon thought people will forget her. i say, boo hoo, it was bad.

2) kinnik - "here for the party" by gretchen wilson. she wears a cowboy hat, and says she's a country girl. god that song sucked. "i may not be a 10". SERIOUSLY?!?!?!? and her voice just isn't good enough. the band was kinda loud. the last note was excrutating. randy didn't like the song on her. but he enjoyed the entertainment part. paula rambles, instead of saying ditto. simon says at least she tried to stand out. but he thinks it's a theme park performance.

3) lisa - "who's lovin' you" by the jackson 5. she used to perform at a production of the lion king. hand gestures. hmpf. it was enjoyable and all, and i did enjoy it, but it wasn't a stand out performance. vocally it was very good. but she needs to step outside the whole slow-schmaltzy-ballads-songs. randy agrees. paula's disagreeing. and she thinks she's a star. simon thinks she'll sail through tonight.

4) melissa - "why haven't i heard from you" by reba mcentire. she's a glorida girl, and she wears flip-flops all the time. she wears a shirt that shows her bellybutton. that's sluttier than i thought. her whole performance was slutty-ish. vocally it was pretty good. i still have no idea who she is... randy thought it was a great song choice, and that it was hot. paula is seeing her coming out of her shell. simon doesn't know what the problem is with melissa. then, after paula bugs him, he says "shut up paula, you are really annoying me". lol. then, after some banter, paula and randy change seats.

5) heather - "hero" by mariah carey. the stalker chose a song that was never done on idol. i am kinda freaked out by her. she had a boa around her neck, or something. she's uglier than i thought. the big note in the middle was funny sounding. i already forgot most of it. it was just meh. or bleh. or blah. or something. it was pretty bad... paula thinks she improved from last week, but wrong song choice. randy thinks she looks great, and reminds us he worked with mariah, and that she paled in comparison. simon says paula and randy are right, and that it was pageant-y, and randy agrees.

6) brenna - "last dance" by donna summer. i HATE her. she says she's gonna own it. she practices poses in front of the mirror. she's never cool, or sexy. she started in a wierd place. the arrangement was yucky. the singing was yucky. the performance was yucky. i HATE her. paula doesn't see the magic, and asks cocky brenna how she thinks she did, and she responded something like "i rock, everybody loves me, and i'm going to be here for a long time". something like that... randy compares her and simon. but he thought it was pitchy allover, and not inspired, and the dancing was off. simon thought it was just terrible, and he thinks she's outta here! i hope so.

7) paris - "wind beneath my wings" by bette midler. she says she's "got favor, g". huh? she has some different looks. or sumthin. the difference between her singing and talking voice is astonishing. she does a very good job with this old and often butchered song. i dunno. i'm still not seeing anything special tonight. ann nesby's in da house. paula likes her fashion tonight. she wants her to celebrate her youth. randy thinks she can definitely sing, and wants her to sing younger songs. simon thought she was boring tonight. for the first time ever, all three judges say the same thing.

8) ayla - "i want you to need me" by cleine dion. she's not used to "this whole thing". she just learned how to put on makeup. i love it! that song sounds kinda depserate. the guys were digging it. i dig her. and y dig i mean plow. or at leasst, would like to plow her. she sang, too? oh, well it was pretty good, and it was a pleasent surprise. paula thinks she wants it really bad. she was pleasently surprised. and she wants her legs. randy likes the no-makeup to makeup, too. he actually liked it. "the dawg liked it". randy said that... simon says she probably got all a's all the time. he thinks she works the hardest, out of all the contestants, but that she works a bit too hard. h also said that it was mechanical. ryan's really short.

9) kellie - "something to talk about" by bonnie raitt. she tried some foods for the first time, and says the dogs in la have more clothes than she does. the song fit her really, REALLY well. and i really, REALLY liked it. it was definitely different and unique. paula asks if she can get any cuter. she rambles about some other things, but eventually said she liked it. randy says "we've got a hot one". and that she did her thing. and he liked it a lot. simon doesn't knwo why people can't help but like her. and he makes fun of the way she says calamari. he didn't think it was the best vocal, but the calamari thing is worth a lot of votes. there is some dancing banter, that was actually kinda funny. she was scared that she'd fall off her heels. lol! i heart her!

10) mandisa - "cry" by faith hill. she's going to try represent for nashville. she likes playing practical jokes on people. that "dog jaw" was kinda funny! i'm not watching this to see big black girls touch themselves. or open their mouth REALLY wide. vocally really good. but the performance was lacking, big time. paula says she's one of a kind and needed in this competition. randy appreciates the dog shout-out. but he thought there were some pitch problems, and he didn't like the song choice. simon thinks she looks very cabaret and old fashioned. he also thinks that when she's on it (on what?), she's the best female in the competition.

GROSS! ryan said something about doing it with his mom all the time. GROSS!

and again, at the end, kellie and kat danced together. HOT!

1. kellie
2. paris
3. lisa
4. ayla
5. mandisa
6. melissa
7. katharine
8. kinnik
9. heather
10. brenna

American Idol S05E13 - Top 24 Results

2009-06-25T06:58:00.002+03:00

24? NAH! more like 20!

finally, simon asks ryan why he's obsessed with what he (simon) wears. and ryan's response was that he looks up to the elderly. lol.

GROUP SONG: "take it easy" by the eagles. seriously? 24 people, and you do a group song? oh. i guess they knew what they were doing. it was quite good.

recap of both guys and girls performances.

brenna says she feels like a duck. paris had a dream about the american idol finale. heather doesn't remember if they ate breakfast. now ryan's looking for the one that got the least number of votes.

the back row, mandisa, kellie, paris, ayla, lisa and kat are safe, for now. heather, stevie and melissa are safe, for now. kinnik becky and brenna go to center stage. we hear what the judges said about them. kinnik's safe, for now. brenna's safe, for now. becky's outta here! but she's hot! damn... paula's crying. simon thinks becky will be a good model. and she sings.

elliot thinks he can always improve, after simon said he was POTENTIALLY the best male vocalist in the show's history. kevin's life's highlight was when the girls pinched his cheeks. lol. and then he hopes next time there'll be some kisses too. lol! ryan's envious of his smoothness. lol. again, looking for the one that got the least number of votes.

the back row, gedeon, david, taylor, will, bucky and patrick are safe, for now. ace and elliot are safe, for now. kevin and chris are safe, for now. bobby and sway go to center stage. we hear what the judges said about them. simon dissed both. bobby's outta here! and he says "i know" when ryan tells him. paula thinks everyone fell in love with bobby. then why is he out? and he sings.

now we're looking for the girl with the second least amount of votes. the back row, mandisa, kellie, paris, ayla, lisa and kat, are again safe. brenna's safe. kinnik's safe. melissa's safe, after we hear what the judges thought about her. we hear what the judges thought about stevie and heather. they go to center stage, oh wait, no, heather sits, and stevie's outta here! she was sick last time. paula was a fan. randy thinks it was the wrong song, simon thought she just got it wrong. she sings.

back to the guys, again looking for the one with the second least number of votes. the front row, ace, kevin, sway, chris and elliot, are safe. the back row form to lines, one to either side of ryan. ryan's REALLY short. we hear what the judges thought about patrick and bucky. taylor and will are safe. gedeon and david are safe. bucky's safe. patrick's outta here! paula's a huge fan. he sings.

we see a "tribute" to the ones leaving. that is, we see their journeys on idol.

American Idol S05E12 - Top 24: Top 12 Guys

2009-06-25T05:03:00.003+03:00

again, 12 sing, 10 advance, only this time, it's the guys' turn!

we get a recap of the girls' performances. then it's a recap of the guys' journeys to the top 24. the song in the background's great.

1) patrick - "come to my window" by melissa etheridge. ENOUGH with the clay comparisons! gay. oh, so, painfully, gay. HAND GESTURES!!!!! gayest. male performance by a clay imitator. ever. it was just so wierd, to hear that song done by a male vocalist. and it wasn't very good, either. randy invented a new number - a thousand million. he dug it. paula thinks his niche is giving others goosebumps. huh? simon's right, it WAS a terrible song. i am happy randy didn't refer to the girls as the dawgpound, though if he calls them the bitchpound, i would laugh, and be forever grateful.

2) david - "crazy little thing called love" by queen. he's a crooner. he had a wierd accent during the song. everyone was digging it, but that's probably down to the song. he snaps. and he bobbs his head. and he crooned on a queen song. it was just a'ight. the song was great, but the vocal was a'ight. and he's chillin' like a villan, as was nikko. randy thought it was terrible. paula said the "kittypound" loved him, and the girls barked. then she said the "paula poodlepound" loved him and they barked again. WHAT ABOUT THE BITCHPOUND?!?!? paula didn't think it was horrible. he sorta agrees with randy, but thinks people will like him, and he's right.

COCA COLA! bucky has problems with remembering lyrics, and he's got a deep shouthern accent.

3) bucky - "simple man" by lynyrd skynyrd. seriously? SERIOUSLY????? i fucking love this song! the growling thing to his voice is annoying and distracting. the arrangement/cut-down version of the song sucked. overall it wasn't great, but the song choice moves it to best yet. randy's a skynyrd fan. and he thought it was "coo'". paula thinks there were some off parts, but he's growing. gross. simon likes him being raw. BUT, he thinks it was bar-band-ish. oh, and the poodlepound barked, too. and bucky says carrie AND bo opened doors for souther.country rockers like him. true. true.

4) william - "i want you back" by the jackson 5. will's also a crooner. though not as much as david. you know what, i don't think he is a crooner. he wanted to perform this song since he was 8. hand gestures... aahhh... but count me impressed! i think he did a very good job with the song, better than nikko last season. BUT, there weren't nearly enough "ooh, ooh baby" for my liking. the poodlepound loved it. randy was entertained, as was i, and thought he did his thang. paula thinks he's adorable. that's useless. simon thought it was vocally average. that might be the case, but the performance as a whole was very good.

5) sway - "reasons" by earth, wind & fire. he sings t to his parents. the key is WAY too high to be even pleseant. that was painful. and bad. and painully bad. and badly painful. and it sucked. i don't care if it was "on pitch" or what not. i HATED it. randy says he did someone proud, and that it was hot. paula thinks he knows how good he is, and he deserves to be there. simon called it pimp-y and third rate. simon's right. as always. paula tells sway she's see him next week. in the audience, undoubtedly.

6) chris - "wanted dead or alive" by bon jovi. i have yet to see him smile. there are flames behind him. he's diagonal! i almost missed the bo train last season, so i'll say it now - chris is awesome, great, and i love him, in a heterosexual way. the performance? BRILLIANT. randy thought it was hot. paula doesn't know where to begin, and is wowed by him. and he thinks he'll go all the way. simon, for the first time tonight, is hearing someone with potential. and, to end it, said it was superb. i concur! chris sorta simled, but not really. it was more like streching the mouth horizontally.

7) kevin - "one last cry" by brian mcknight. he thinks age is just a number. that's mature of him. he's a cute little kid, isn't he? his nostrils open wide when he sings, which reminds me of my sister - her nostrils open and close rapidly when she's REALLY laughing. it's really funny. what? the performance? if he hadn't just followed the bald wonder that is chris, i would have said it was REALLY good. REALLY REALLY good. 2nd best, but ya know... randy says it was "da bom". paula said something about squish, and him making her beam. and wreckless something. kevin looks like the only time he was ever wreckless was when he was late to return a library book once, oh so long ago. simon likes him, but didn't like the vocal part. simon is, probably for the first time ever, wrong! the girls think kevin's REALLY cute, and they pinch his cheeks, as if they were annoying aunts.

8) gedeon - "shout" by the isley brothers. how on earth is this song supposed to work? this is NOT a song for a solo vocalist... "IT". "IT". "IT". i hate him... he looks like some pedophile/stalker type dude. "IT". "IT". "IT". he explains his song choice like he's re-giving mlk's dream speech. "IT". "IT". "IT". that SUCKED, small kiddy balls. you just CAN'T do that song on american idol... "IT". "IT". "IT". the girls answered the "hey hey hey hey" part. i hate him. "IT". "IT". "IT". randy was "absolutely entertained". paula was thrown for lube? HUH??? simon thinks it was like the warm-up for the chippendales. "IT". "IT". "IT". and gedeon's smile bothers him. "IT". "IT". "IT". i just noticed gedeon's name is giddy in disguise. i hate him. i really do. "IT". "IT". "IT".

9) elliot - "if you really love me" by stevie wonder. he's one of my people, so i'm contractually obliged to root for him. he doesn't do warmup routines. we see part of his audition for the first time. he says he was "stuck with one of the twins" in hollywood. lol! well, someone had to sing stevie. he admits to singing karaoke a lot. he kinda looks like frank ribery, a football (soccer) player, currently playing for bayern munich. ribery's butt ugly... all in all, he did an excellent job. again, not chris, but the closest yet. paula was standing and cheering, the girls were diggin' it. randy thought he sounded brilliant. paula thought it was effortless and great. simon thinks potentially, he's the best male vocalist they've EVER had. WHOA!!!

10) bobby - "copacabana" by barry manilow. we see his first audition, for the first time ever. GOD, this is going to suck... he's the second disturbing, stalker/pedophile looking guy. he can't dance/move. i was right. it DID suck. just terrible song choice. he's not a very good singer. it looked a little, like simon said in his first audition, as if he was drunk. he makes fun of his size, and it is funny! bobby's got the hots for manilow. he thinks he's more of an entertainer than vocalist. bobby's got a HUGE barry manilow fetish. paula though it was risky. and she took her imaginary hat off. simon thinks it was a complete negative. ryan gets a bit pissed at simon. bobby puts an arm aroun dryan as he gives out his number, and gives a creepy, yet funny smile. then, he full on hugs him. lol!

11) ace - "father figure" by george michael. in the group performance, he looked constipated. i don't think ace's target audience want him to be their father figure, but rather he puts his figure... alright i'll stop now. aside for the stretching of the arm at the end, it was a very good performance. VERY VERY good performance. actually, a bt great. randy was laughing during the performance, and calls him a star. and says he can really sing. paula's in love. and she's got a lot of gay friends. simon thinks it wasn't the best vocal, but the brilliant song choice will get him sailing through to the top 12. i don't get the obssesion about the way ace looks...

12) taylor - "levon" by elton john. he's a bit querky (i think that's how you write it...). he says he's had a great father figure in his life. he means ace? he crouches onto the mic, rather than raising the mic to his mouth. he's got wierd stage presence, and moves oddly on the stage. vocally, though, it was one of the best tonight. really, REALLY great. randy loves him. paula and him argue which one is his biggest fan. paula loves taylor for loving music. taylor looks about as old as his dad. simon admits he was wrong about the whole "not for the top whatever" thing. taylor really seems to be all about the music. and he said "bust your bums". and he screamed "soul patrol". and when ryan said he doesn't knw what's going on, he said me neither. LOL! i am now, officially, a fan of the hick that is hicks. still not completely sure about the vocals, but the personality is definitely there. and then he and ryan just jump. lol.

i personally think the guys are overall stronger than the girls, though at the top, it's close, with 4 great/very good guys and 4 great/very good girls.

1. chris
2. taylor
3. elliot
4. ace
5. kevin
6. william
7. bucky
8. patrick
9. david
10. sway
11. gedeon
12. bobby

American Idol S05E11 - Top 24: Top 12 Girls

2009-06-25T02:53:00.003+03:00

12 girls perform, 10 move on.

just in case we weren't sure, ryan reminds us that THIS, is aMMMerican idol. the "dawgpound"'s still there. damn.

we get a recap of the girls' journeys to the top 24.

1) mandisa - "never" by heart. she's a cali-girl, but now is oficially a nashville-ian. she wants to show that sistas can rock. and she did. that was very fun. i don't know how her "fanbase" will take this side of her, but she was very good. the outfit was horrendous. but the performance was good. paula's wrong. i have no idea what paula was talking about. mandisa and simon are practically dating. gross. i am slightly disturbed by her...

2) kellie - "how far" by martina mcbride. she doesn't really have a love life. well, i'm free! she's very cute. but she's got wierd hand movements. and she's singing a love song for her father. it was a'ight. i mean, there were some bad parts, vocally, but all in all, i think she did a good job. paula thinks she sucked, but that her personality that will take her through. kellie's "monsterrr! was cute. she's "really nervous". lol. she rambles about something, but is totally cute.

3) becky - "because the night" by patti smith. "but paula believed in me". huh? she chose the song because it was on the first cd she ever got. i thought i'd like her. i don't. luckily for her, she's pretty and hot. god that sucked. it was not unbelieveably terrible, but there was nothing good about it. that song sucked too. that last note was BAD. the dawgpound's back. ugh. paula hates her. simon's hot for her.

4) ayla - "reflection" by christina aguilera. she's much taller than ryan. if you don't know, she's a basketball player. the whole narration thing SUCKS. she likes the film mulan. she played boys' football? now THAT would be hot. she looks uglier than what i remembered. hmmm. the performance was pretty good. her eyes were closed for too much time. but it was good. the judges were pleasently surprised. i sort of agree.

5) paris - "midnight train to georgia" by gladys knight & the pips. she's from georgia. she was too perky and happy for a relatively sad song. BUT, she was great. i LOVE the song choice for her. she's pretty cute. that really was great. best yet, and it's not even that close. randy was surprised, and was blowen away. paula's wearing no hat, but it's off to her. and she noticed she managed to avoid a wardrobe malfunction. lol.

6) stevie - "to where you are" by josh groban. she was trained in opera. her initial audition SUCKED. and she sings an opera song. WHY ON EARTH WOULD SHE DO THAT??? she wants to be the female josh groban. hi. i'm bored. i mean, really, REALLY bored. nothing good about it. i was surprised someone was still awake when she finished. i really hope she leaves, so that we aren't punished by another "opera infused" snoozer. randy was daydreaming. paula listened. simon thought she messed it up. i hated it. and she says she WILL bring it. and simon's obnoxious.

ryan says he's taller than tom cruise, and stevie says he might have a chance with her. ugh. just, ugh. and THEN, ryan says they'll "take a BREAK, and be right back". ugh. just, ugh.

7) brenna - "you are the sunshine of my life" by stevie wonder. i HATE her. "bling bling, and shine on". I HATE HER. she has a "sad" story about her middle name being mema. that was AWFUL. just awful. she can't perform for shit, and her voice isn't all that good. and she was pitchy. REALLY pitchy. the "stay around" at the end SUCKED big hairy diamond balls. she SUCKS. randy thought it was safe, but that the last note was good. huh? and paula talks about humble pie. huh? simon thought it was horrible. lol at the wild cat with gloves, coat and hat. lol! and she talks back. i HATE her. simon and her were both born on oct 7. oh god... i HATE her.

8) heather - "when you tell me that you love me" by diana ross. i used to think she's pretty. now i think she's pretty hot. but NOT pretty. her name's heather COCKs. her voice was "shot" at the end of hell week. and she's so blessed by something. that song choice SUCKS. and she's a crazy idol stalker. she has wierd singing faces. and zero stage presence. she didn't blink. it was pretty bad. i dunno. randy thought it was boring and pitchy. that makes 2 of us. paula agrees. that makes 3 of us. simon thought it was forgettable. lol at his analogy.

we get some funny moments next - ryan asks heather if she's alright, and she says yes. simon says she needed an excuse, and should have said no. then heather says no. simon says that's a good girl. ryan says simon should have worn a t-shirt under the sweater, but we all make mistakes. lol. and then, when we come back from the break, ryan tells everyone to relax, and that randy's got some baby oil and is going to luge around the set. GROSS!!!!!!!

9) melissa - "when the lights go down" by faith hill. how did fugly melissa compete in beauty pageants? her audition wasn't good. she's a bum-lovin' girl? does that means she likes big butts, or that she likes to take it up the ass? i think simon got it right the first time - 6 out of ten. a bit less. just average. nothing bad about it,but it didn't stand out. too many yeah-yeah-yeah's. and she sang "when the la-y-a-y-a-y-ts go down". randy takes about five minutes to get started. randy's right. paula's wrong. simon's in the middle. and then she complains she wasn't shown yet.

10) lisa - "i am changing" by jennifer holliday. she talked about something in the intro, but i didn't care to pay attention. she performs like a veteran. and her voice sounds great. and she's on pitch, throughout. and she's very good. not as good as the fun 16 yr old, but still very very good. RANDY rambles, not paula. and then paula rambles. simon agrees with me! lol. he says that she made older girls look bad. i sorta said that.

11) kinnik - "get here" by oleta adams. what sort of a name is kinnik? she shouted in her audition. she said "alita". not oleta, "alita". her mouth's HYOOOGE. that song's been done so many times, it's boring. too many runs. didn't care for the arrangement either. i thought it pretty much stunk. some pitch problems too, i thought. randy says it's 6 outta 10, and was pitchy. paula thought it was great, obviously. simon didn't think it was stunning, and that it was cabaret.

12) katharine - "since i fell for you" by barbara streisand. she's got the pretty/cute/hot thing going on for her. i like her. she looks up to babs. ugh. she does a fantastic job. she just seems so comfortable on stage. vocally great. paula was diggin' it. i was too. really, really great. randy thought it was hot. or maybe he thought katharine's hot. i dunno. and she does a little dance when the "dawgpound" cheer. cute! randy called it amazing. paula loves her job. and rambles about something about tapping something. i dunno. simon thought that 4 were very good tonight, and she was the best. kat (her name from now on) is so cute! when ryan asks her how she feels, she says it's great and flings her arms around. cute! she's really cute! she apologizes for the ones behind her for having to stare at her butt the whole time. lol! cute!

over the credits, i was drooling at the image of kellie jumoing on kat and hugging her, and then the two of the dancing together. :(________) (tried to do a jaw dropped smiley, didn't really work...)

1. katharine
2. paris
3. lisa
4. mandisa
5. ayla
6. kellie
7. melissa
8. becky
9. kinnik
10. heather
11. stevie
12. brenna

American Idol S05E10 - The Chair: The Top 24 Are Revealed

2009-06-24T11:41:00.004+03:00

44 go up the elevator, 24 go down happy.

some people are confident, other are scared/anxious/you know.

jessica santos isn't through. blue? is also out. it's bobby, that's the name. brooke's out. nick isn't either. i don't remember any of them. stephanie's out. i don't remember her either. crystal's a capella wasn't good, but she thinks it was her best audition. she's out. another bobby's next. and i don't know him either. katharine's upset that crystal's not through. she curses. she's really cute. bobby's out too. katharine's nervous. she's next. i DO remember her. her a capella was good. and she's crying. she's through! she kisses everyone on the lips. cute! she's really happy. she's cute.

ace had problems choosing the a capella song. it was a'ight. he's nervous. the judges stare at him. and his through. paula's hot after he leaves. antonio (who?) and eugenia (who?), who thinks that it's over for her, cause she's 26, are out. bobby (WHO?) is through. he's got a creepy face. eugenia's pissed. robert/bobby makes fun of his weight. ha! mandisa saw simon's comments, and tells a funny joke about needing a bigger chair! lol! but she forgives simon. and he's humbled. and she's through. she screams. and simon apologizes.

they make people sit, to make them nervous, but elliot's not nervous. melissa (WHO!?!?) is through. mark adam (WHO!?!?!?!?) is out. lisa's next. she thinks her voice wasn't really there for her a capella, but she was good. she's through. david doesn't know what he did right. he's a croon. he runs to the chair. and he's through. and he's melting in the elevator. it's sway's b-day. his a capella wasn't good. he's got a gift! he's through! elliot's through. brenna's "reflective". i HATE her. simon WAS funny. simon tells her like it is. she's shocked. i'm glad he said that. and she's through. i HATE her. the others aren't really happy.

marcy's brenna's group-preformance-mate, and she's not happy with her. and she's not through. as are nicole (who?), david (who?), william (who?) and brianna (who?). gedeon's confident. he's got a face of a sexual predator. his a capella was over the top, but good. he's cocky and confident. "IT. IT. IT.". and he's through. stevie's a girl. her a capella was good. her nose is wierd. she's through. she's overwhelmed. i do remember ayla. her a capella was pretty good. lol at paula's comment. she's through. lol at simon's comment too. chris is stuck in the elevator. lol! i do remember him. he's frustrated. his part of the group performance was good. finally, he gets to the room with the chair, after an "aggravating" 6 minutes. and he's through.

paris and rebecca (the twin that did audition) are making a list to see what ther chances are of going through. rebecca's a capella was a'ight. and she's through. she screams. heather and april (WHO!?!?!?) are next. april's out. heather's kinda hot. and she's through. bucky's nervous. his a capella was good-ish. he's through. patrick is the one constantly compared to clay. he says he's "not as pretty as ace, but who is?". he's through. young chicken little, kevin's next. it was a difficult decision about him, and he's through! yay! paris' next, and she's relaxed. her a capella was good. she's through.

the brittenum twins are back. i HATE them. they were incarcerated! yay! they bought a car with a fake name. lol! and they are out! yay! kellie's next, and her a capella of "bridge over troubled water" was pretty good! and she's cute! and she's through! she's shocked! she cries! after her audition, she bought waterproof mascara, and it's being out to good use! lol! taylor's the guy with grey hair that simon didn't think randy and paula would put him through to the top 24. lol! he plays the harmonica, all the way to the chair! lol! he's nervous. i guess simon was wrong, cause he's through! and he plays the harmonica again, and ad-libs. lol! i like him! now the last two girls, kinnik and megan (WHO!?!?!?). the first a capella sucked. the second was a bit better. megan's out, kinnik's through. william's "bridge" was good. syd's a capella wasn't as good. william's through. and shocked. syd's out.

the top 24 are: Katharine McPhee, Ace Young, Bobby Bennett, Mandisa (just mandisa), Melissa McGhee, Lisa Tucker, David Radford, Sway Penala, Elliot Yamin, Brenna Gethers, Gedeon McKinney, Stevie Scott, Ayla Brown, Chris Daughtry, Rebecca O'Donohue, Heather Cox, Bucky Covington, Patrick Hall, Kevin Covais, Paris Bennett, Kellie Pickler, Taylor Hicks, Kinnik Sky, William Makar.

American Idol S05E09 - Hollywood Week, Part 2

2009-06-24T10:45:00.002+03:00

group performances! yay! this is going to suck!

the ones left are exauhsted. DRAMA! I DON'T CARE! btw, i HATE the brittenum twins. BOTH of 'em. some groups have no drama in them! shocker!

first up are paris, who was a'ight, stephenie, who was good, hanna, who we didn't see. paris and stephenie are through. next, one of the two i hate, anthony, sway and elliot. anthony's not good. elliot's really good. sway was also quite good. fumbled the lyrics, but good. the twins still got that annoying throaty intake, i HATE him. and then he disses the two that went to sleep. i HATE him. anthony isn't through, despite terrell's promise, and the rest are through. and then terrell disses anthony. I HATE HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the "rat pack", a group of four young guys, mostly crooners, are all good. it's kevin, jordan, david and william, and they're all through. that's what happens when there's no drama! what's with the group names? tyra switched groups, but has problems with her new group. BITCH. derrell doesn't know the words. he's through. but, he decides to quit, along with his brother. I HATE THEM!!!!!!!!! ARGH!!!!!!!!! oh god, i hate them. he did it because he thought they cut his bro, and they didn't. ugh. mandisa's group does band of gold. in the group are also brooke, sarah and mecca. i think they're all through.

some people mess up the lyrics. katharine messed up? i'm disappointed... tyra's a BITCH. she decides to leave her new group, and try and rejoin her old one. BEOTCH! the group she left is having problems. they all go home. tyra's a BITCH. the twins are back, and are still full of shit. simon puts them in their place. FINALLY. PLEASE, don't take thme back. tyra's old/new group's next. they don't forget the lyrics. i hate tyra. all are through. i hate tyra. a group that had drama are next. they're bad. brenna SUCKS. i hate her. i HATE her. nick's through. brenna and the other chick are also through. a "brokeback mountain" parody. ugh. the three cowbys. ugh.

so they decided to let the twins back. damn... the cowboys are next. oh my gosh, did they suck. it was cute, though. garet's gonna be crushed... simon looks disgusted. lol at matthew's hip thrusts. AND the "maybe later". lol! poor garet. they're all outta here. poor garet! they cry. awww... now THAT is brokeback! well, garet's not as broken as i thought. he's very mature.

i HATE brenna. now, it's a capella, and they need to choose one of 90 sumthin songs. we don't see a lot. after some long minutes, the judges are done.

room 1 - gina, tyra (I HATE HER) and her group mate nicole. they're outta here. woohoo.

room 2 - rebecca, the twin that did audition, and some others. they are through. chris the rocker's there, as are mandisa, say and some other people.

room 3 - katharine, one of the twins, and others. elliot's thee. they're through. paris is thee. taylor too.

room 4- kevin, kellie, i think william, ace. after getting their hopes down, they're through.

and it's a hapy reunion. for the twins too. DAMN.

next, it's the chair!

American Idol S05E08 - Hollywood Week, Part 1

2009-06-24T09:59:00.003+03:00

hollywood. hell week. here we go!

half will sing, and half will vay-cay. yay. they get to choose one of 12 songs. some people are nervous. kellie! i like her! she's a TRUE amature. she's good. she's through! yay! she's so cute! patrick's good. i don't know. the clay comparison's bogus. i liked clay better. he's through.

the ones that are having fun, are having fun. i HATE rj. and i don't like steven. they're not that good. they're outta here! yay! lisa's good. she's through. others also sing that "hopelessly devoted to you". including a dude. the dude's through.

the ones that are having fun, are still having fun. ashley's bad. kymyata's name sucks. he sucks. linelle's bad. paris' cute. paula's laugh is horrendous. she's really good. she's through. the ones that are having fun are, still, having fun. grey haired taylor's good. really good. simon now thinks he's interesting. he's through. cute garet's still cute. "YOU CAN'T ALWAYS GET WHAT YOU WANT"!!! I LOVE THAT SONG!!! some people go home. others, 41 total, go through.

the ones that didn't have fun the previous day, are now having fun. the others are nervous/out of school and have fun. melissa's a'ight. megan's a beotch. seriously. she sounds like CRAP! she's annoying. i hate her. she's through. we hear some excuses. the ones that are now having fun, are having fun. i HATE the brittenum twins. they suck. just because. the whole twins gimmick is so old. the second was actually worst than the first. they're both through. ugh. and they're pissed at the judges. i HATE them. and the diss carrie. HOW DARE THEY!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? and ryan reminds us that carrie's album's gone double platinum (at the time of the episode). HA!

gina, david, ace and kevin sing the same song. ace was the best, but only because of the performance aspect of it. the four are all through. the other twins from chi-town, joshua and jarrett are next. joshua's not great, but a'ight. jarrett's worse. much worse. they're both out. if the brittenum twins got connections, what the fuck are they doing on the show? the ones that are having fun, are, still, having fun. garet's still unbelieveably cute. and he's a dude! i can't believe myself. he's not that good. everyone loves him. but he's through. he's shocked. he's still cute. i need to be hit by something. hard. the brittenum twins are back, and are pissed. they're bitches. I HATE THEM.

chris rocks! everyone LOVES him. he's through. mandisa's great. and through. katharine's next. she's awesome! paula said she can blow. huh? she's through. crazy dave is still crazy. and. he still can't sing. he jumps on to the judges' platform thing. lol. he's NOT through.

that's it! 66 are outta here! so, 99 are left! next, group performances! did i tell you that i hate the brittenum twins? cause i do. i REALLY do!

American Idol S05E07 - Boston Auditions

2009-06-24T09:04:00.002+03:00

welcome to bean-town! boston! well, technicaly it's foxborough, but it's the intentions that count!

BOSTON -

ugh. at least it's the last one... james' alias is ghost. he floats in some styles. i hate him. he SUCKS. ayla's awesome! she sings AND plays basketball. her dad's a senator. she sang at a patriots game. awesome! she's pretty. she's good. she's through.

the azerbaijani (?) chick's so not sexy. irada's her name. simon asks if they're going to see her whole package. gross. she sang "um-break my heart". she SUCKS. and she stripped. ugh. laurence SUCKS. alison sucks. katherine SUCKS. some people get insulted by simon. and get pissed.

the o'donahue twins are pretty and hot. they play b-ball too! one of them won't audition, cause she had surgery or something. the whole mirror thing that happened before she started singing was funny! rebecca sings black velvet. she's a'ight. but she's got a whole terrible act. and her sister mimics her, and does the same movments. she's through. and she screams. tatiana's got something to prove to her grandma/mom? i dunno. she's alright. kinda weak. she kinda sighs/grunts/moans. she kisses ass. A LOT. some more chicks go through.

ryan reminds us of the perks of having to work about 2 days a week, for about 2-3 hours. some people got terrible jobs. the last one SUCKS. and what's with the holding the imaginary mic? we see some people work in terrble jobs. holly sings to old people. awww... she can sing. she's not through. kenneth's gay. he sings cher. he SUCKS cher's big hairy balls. simon advices him to be a female impersonator. "i'm a MAN!". yeah, right. i have no idea what that "back side of a pair of jeans" comment was all about, or what it meant. please, educate me! he's got crazy eyes.

a lot of guys are really young. and aren't going through. kevin's got a wierd 'do. he's kinda like chicken little. he's good! wow! he's really good! paula finally admits her real age, and says she's 80! he's through! what's with simon hating on a lot of guys that go through. we see a terrible montage of "joy to the world". lol at the death-metal/whatever guys with the masks, shields and swords. HA!

michael "looks like clay". he's gay as hell. i HATE him. he's so full of it. he SUCKS big hairy, clay aiken look-a-like balls. his excuse? he's got to pee. RIGHT. so they let him take a leak and come back. he runs! we get some fitting music. he even washes his hands! aaaaaaaaaaand...... he STILL sucks. that was useless. 28 people from boston are through.

we see a recap of the auditions. yay. next - hollywood, and hell week!

American Idol S05E06 - Austin Auditions

2009-06-24T06:20:00.003+03:00

austin, texas, the live music capital of the world! yeah, it's true!

AUSTIN -

it's hot in texas! shocking! lol at the girl running away screaming "after seeing simon's pecks". ha! julian's a dancer. he sucks. he's a dork. he's gay. h does a split. my balls really hurt. i'm in pain. i'm about to vomit blood. he sucks. he's still gay. michelle sucks. lol at the number falling, and her asking if she needs to pick it up, and paula shaking her head ever so slightly. arthur sucks. donnell sucks. BUT, he does the jigglypuff song, so i LOVE him! paula SUCKS. the one that auditioned named paula suck too. i hate her. the one that auditioned too. she's a CRAZY fan. the one that auditioned, that is. she SUCKS. both of them. how does having braces supposed to affect your singing? and she gets pissed. what's wrong with her lips? it's like someone with parkinson's put her lipstick on!

some people dress as zombies. danielle's somewhat cute. but she sucks. CHANEQUA!!!! ARGH!!!!! I HATE STUPID NAMES!!!!!!!!! she sucks. anisa sucks. that hurt. we see a "horror" ilm parody. that sucked. jason's a funeral director/embalmer. hi, i'm scared. we get some jokes about the dead/the simon. jason's loud. but he's good. he's through. cierra? Cierra? CIERRA?!?!? she sucks. i hate her. that was painful. REALLY painful. and she thinks simon really wanted her to sing another song. a lot of people don't go through.

allison almost died on the way to austin. freightning! she RECOMMENDS people to nearly die on a plane, as it "changes things". she's stupid as heck, ain't she? she sucks, big shiny, metal-y plane balls. lol at her stopping because the judges laughed. at least she knows she sucked. she gets half an hour to get her nerves in check. LMAO! after simon suggests she imagine randy in swimming trunks, to help her relax, she says she already imagined him (simon), which is probably why she sucked so bad. LOL! ROFL! LMAO! and paula screams touchdown. simon tries to save face. he doesn't, really. some more people don't go through. jeffrey doesn't have a reason to why he's the next american idol. or why he's there. he's boring. and dull. and bland. ricky, shut up! lol! after randy pressures him because he's a music major, ricky says "i shouldn't have said that..." lol! he doesn't suck! what's with so many singing "i can't make you love me"? it's a chick song! just cause the fraude known as constance did it last season, that doesn't mean it's a good idea! he's good, though, and is through. ashley's hot, but ugly and a snob. i hate her. there are some randy's weight jokes. she's alright. she can sing with her mouth clothes! that's so freaky! simon's wrong. NO ONE's going to like her. she's through.

rj's a dick. a cock, a schmock. i HATE him. i REALLY, REALLY, REALLY hate him. he's THE most cocky person on tv. EVER. i HATE him. and apparently so does everyone else. he's kinda good. I HATE HIM. he's through. I HATE HIM! randy's right! he was terrible! randy's slimmer clone's next! FUNNY! simon's shocked that looking like randy helps him with the chicks. LOL! he's kinda alright. *firefox just crashed, nearly destroing EVERYTHING! but it's all good...* we get more randy-kevin comparisons. he's not through.

allison's back. she still sucks. she's a good sport. william's 16. he's good. fun. he's good. paula doesn't think he's ready. simon likes him. he's through.

tessie mae's FAT. that braided hair thing is fugly. SHE's UGLY! she's cocky as hell. she can be the next big famous person. with an emphasis on the big. and really quitely saying the famous. she thinks simon's gonna love her. he isn't. she SUCKS, big, hairy, multi-colored dragon balls! YEAH!!! she SUCKS! AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! THE SUCKINESS!!!!!!!! AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! she thinks she sounds like avril lavigne. she's not through. and that's it. 12 go through, and 1 of them hit ryan, twice! lol! jeffrey still doesn't know why he's there. next, boston! sorta! around it! near it!

American Idol S05E05 - Las Vegas Auditions

2009-06-24T05:18:00.003+03:00

viva las vegas? let's hope so.

LAS VEGAS-

"dylon", the fake jamaican, is the lamest person, ever. he sucks. and they make fun of him. simon said "hell buddah". "dylon" cries. the clown didn't even get to sing. bobie mae, the terrible psychic from season past, is back! her sis is going to sing. simon's mean. that's not new. she's NOT 24. erica's better than bobie mae, but she sucks. mecca's got the wierdest name ever. she's a belly dancer. she looks like a girly dude. that spiraly "hair" thing on her cheek is odd. she's quite good. that spiraly thing freaks me out. she's through. she's really short.

ryan's crazy. he reminds me of a classmate i used to have, that was all into manowar and stuff like that. he curses. he thinks he's really funny. he sings a heavy metal/death metal/shit metal song, and he does a wierd dinosaur sort of a sound with his voice. simon bored. he's bored with simon. he claims it was too hardcore for them. you know what's too hardcore for us? your suckiness. and uncoolness. the judges go crazy with the dino voice. heather's a prison ward. we get some disgusting hand-cuffing comments. and she sings "redneck woman". brilliant song choice. she's great. she's through.

that fake italian accent sucks, and is really irritating. jason's his real name, and he sings one of my fave songs. he kinda wrecks the melody. he's a'ight. simon says no. paula says no. randy would have said yes. the man with the stabbing motions is back! as are some more people. they are just sad. jc's the stabber. he's got a mullet. lol at simon calling the bus a weapon. he's not through. and he gets pissed. anthony's BIG. and you thought frenchie/mandisa were big. he's tone is too high. and he wrecks the melody. but i guess he's alright. he's not through. and he's nice about it. and then simon gives a snide fat remark.

pearson twins. are somewhat cute. they have WAY too much winnie the pooh dolls. aaand... the sing together. not that good. they're not through. david's dull. he can't dance. he sucks. they all crack up. we see a "funny" csi parody, about terrible singer. that sucked.

haggai yedidya's one of my people, and is from israel. he's an ars. look it up. and he's got the worst accent ever. he has a thingy to let hiim know the right key. simon, rightfully, nakes fun of that. he's a bigger fraude than the fraude 2.0 of last season. HE'S ISRAELI! AND HE SINGS ABOUT BEING PROUD TO BE AN AMERICAN! he sucks, big hairy jewish matza balls. he does a terrible routine. he sucks. he thinks he's got perfect pitch. he sucks. and he just walks out. i hate him. he doesn't blink. i'm scared. princess? PRINCESS?? PRINCESS!?!?!?!?! she thinks she sounds like aretha. she's wrong. she sucks. she's "blunt, sassy, but also a perfectionist". she REALLY sucks. that was painfully bad. lol at simon's "shut her up, stop it, stop it, stop it". LOL! some people don't get through. and then we get a TERRIBLE destruction of "i will survive", by some people that suck.

some people have wierd hair/wigs on. the "last hope of the day", taylor, has grey hair, and that started when he was 14/15. he can't dance. he does a good job with "a change is gonna come". unique, too. he does another song, and he does some spastic dancing. he's got a good voice, but the stage antics are a bit off-putting. he's really shy. simon tries to make a point. but no one gets what he tried to say, and think he meant the opposite. lol. simon says no. he's still through. all in all JUST 11 are through from vegas. 11! next, austin!

American Idol S05E04 - San Francisco Auditions

2009-06-24T04:09:00.002+03:00

i left my heart in san frannnnnnnnncisco... and the talent...

SAN FRANCISCO -

happy heidi's kinda pretty, but not really. she sings opera! she sings opera? she sings opera!?!?!?!?!? she's good at it. the "pop" song wasn't as good. but still, good enough to go through. randy takes an hour to decide. eventually, she's not through. oh, well. shawn looks like an overgrown baby. he SUCKS. that was painful. simon called it almost non-human.

some people don't go through. others prepare. jose "sway" got a personalised belt buckle. that's worse than a personalised lisence plate. he snaps. he's good. he's through. lauren's also good and through. some more go through. matthew is a NERD. he keeps talking about clay. he's no where near. he loves wolves, so his nickname is wolfie. he sings a clayken song. he SUCKS, big hairy wolf balls. he keeps talking about clay. we get a comparison between him and clay. he sucks (not clay).

john looks about 40. over the top. he's disturbing. the "remix" sucked. but he can kinda sorta sing. simon's pissy. he's through. some people bring their vocal coaches. katharine's cute and pretty, and somewhat hot. she must have a lot of pressure on her. i kinda like her. she really good. like, great. they just didn't want the audition to stop. she's really cute. she cries. i am now sure that i like her. she's through. *note: this is the girl simon picked to win the whole season*

eric sucks. but he does a bob dylan song, which i quite like. shalicia's personality sucks. her name sucks. her "moves" suck. she sucks. i hate her. and she does a speech sort of thing. i hate her. she sucks. i hate her. she quit her job. she's very excited. it's her life. i hate her. simon helps her get her job back. that's actually nice of him. and she gets her job back! finally, a yes for shalicia! i hate her. lol at simon's german/austrian accent. shawna's song selection SUCKS. but she doesn't. the second song was better. she's kinda good. simon says no. randy and paula don't know what's wrong with him. she's through.

some people suck. other suck at dancing. a chick sucks at rapping. some beatbox, and suck at it. marcus' ANNOYING. i hate him. he sucks. and they want him to rap. he sucks. and then he dances. and he sucks. and then he beatbox-es, and he sucks. he REALLY sucks. i hate him. he's not through. OBVIOUSLY. he talks really, really fast. jayne's a wierd way to spell jane. she's pretty good. simon looks bored. he thought it wasn't that good. he says it's a no. everyone's shocked. he says "beethoven and mozart" will put her through. she is through. "is there a different radio playing in your head?" lol. DRAMA! simon v paula & randy. we get some disagreement between the judges. DRAMA!

deborah's about 40. she's "the rock girl". i hate her. she "rocks". she played air guitar. she sucks. paula says yes. randy says no. simon says he prefers her with his eyes shut. he DID say it to clay, but it was in the finals, not the audition. simon says no. she's outta here! and simon storms out. whoopee. he's "pissed". manuel does hot sauce shots to warm his vocal chords. he's "religious". i hate him. he takes a while to get started, kisses the "statue", and begins sucking. he starts another song. and he still sucks. and another song. and he still sucks. he doesn't understand they said no.

18 are through. JUST 18. next, las vegas!

American Idol S05E03 - Greensboro Auditions

2009-06-24T02:08:00.002+03:00

greensboro, nc, home of the aiken and the 'tasia!

GREENSBORO -

sabrina's got no neck. i would NEVER hit on her. she SUCKS. she's doesn't know the lyrics, either. she REALLY sucks. jerry springer? huh? "you mean a couple o' gallons?" lol! she gets pissed. cachet? cachet?? CACHET?!?!?!? WTF IS THAT NAME?!?!?!? she SUCKS. big hairy horsie balls. i didn't even recognize the song, it was so horrible. some people don't get through. amanda sucks. ROFL! simon reaction was SO funny! kellie's really cute. like really, really cute. her story's SO sad... i like her. i really like her. she never sang in front of people? she sings kelly? at least she's aware of what she's doing. she's good! real good! she's shocked. and she keeps talking. lol! i love her! she's through! she's crying. i REALLY like her!

shawn's got a BIG sign. that sucks. his brother's REALLY confident. the tux is too much. way too much. he's a crooner. that sucks. he might be alright, but he's got no place on idol. he's out. he says "darn, man". the judges give snipe-y waiter comments. lol. his little brother's annoying. he thinks it's bologne! bologne! some people suck, and bring props. richard's a ventriloquist.he's got a dummy. he's a dummy. he's kinda good. he's outta here. rhonda's voice creeps me out. randy should really stop saying that "prove that YOU'RE the next american idol" thing. rhonda sucks. she's not sweet, cute and adorable. she's not through. she pouts. she tells simon she loves him. and then she gets a hug from ryan. steven's full of himself. i hate him. i REALLY hate him. he's kinda got a good voice. randy and simon make paula dance with him. randy dances with himself. he's through. aaaand... he's married.

halicia? Halicia? wtf?!?!? she's excited. she's "a very very people person"? she claps. she's kinda good. she kisses simon. she's through. i'm not excited. she's is very much so. all her 4000 relatives are too. and she told them all! donny's mom hasn't heard him sing. he's going to suck, isn't he. he sings clay's bridge over troubled water. he SUCKS. kendra's been in 42(!) different foster homes. she tells ryan she thinks he's hot. simon thinks she looks like a young whitney. but does she SOUND like a young whitney? she's way too perky. she's good. she's through.

chase's GAY. he sucks. he's kinda good. he's through. simon tells some people he's not being rude. someone tells ryan he's short. she wears a bikiny? her name's chonna? CHONNA?!!!!!!!??????? she sucks. i hate her. she can kinda sing. she's not through.

some don't go through. some, girls, do. eric sucks. brandon looks like he's on crack. he sucks. he's outta here. his gf(?) is annoying. some people forget their words. ryan's got a wierd accent. how is ryan short/nickname for jeffery? he's a'ight. simon takes a jab at seacrest. he's through. cedric's related to fantasia. he looks bored. he loves simon. he sings chain of fools? WHY???? HOW ON EARTH DOES PUTTING A HAND OVER ONE EAR SUPPOSED TO HELP YOU!?!!?!?!!!!!!?????? he sucks. he does sound like a little girl when he sings. paris' grandma is ann nesby. randy's pumped about it. paris' is 17, and she's cute. "yes ma'am". ha! she's really good. with the pedigree, why does she need this competition? the second song was MUCH better. she's through. she opens the door, falls to her knees, and the door hits her. LOL! her grandma cries. did she cry when she got those grammys too? 24 are through on day one.

day two's simon b-day. he's now about 157? 158? something like that. marcus is stupid as heck. he's about as smart as a shoe lace. he's really self confident. he sucks. he does a REALLY wierd face when he sings. and his hand movments are just odd. he learned from the randy and paula dvd. ROFLAMO!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!! lol at simon "there is a god!". lol! paula suggests he should model, and simon says that randy's got a modeling dvd coming out. LOL! ROFL! LMAO! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! simon loves the world. and marcus goes outside, and breaks the dvd with a hammer. lol!

some people try to stand out. jimmy's boring. REALLY, REALLY boring. he SUCKS. he sings with his eyes closed. he SUCKS. simon's not being rude, but thinks he has the personality of a hippo when he sings. lol. sammy's gay, with a capital G. and he's crazy. really, really crazy. and "raw". he's crazy. he sucks. he dances with a rug. he sucks. he shakes his booty. i just puked. lol at simon's sly stalone comment! lol!

tyra's from nyc. she's good, but distinctly average. she's through. she's not overly ecstatic. some dude look like crap. or shit. or poo. seth SUCKS. he keeps forgetting the lyrics. he's a jacko impersonator, and he forgets the lyrics to thriller. he sucks, big gray and hairy elephant balls. randy says "good lookin' out" to everyone that doesn't go through.

the village people's long lost umpteenth member, jordan, is kinda good. but what's with the firefighter outfit? "fire in the hole" is for grenades... randy's a moron. he's through. he's shocked. he cries. he's seriously happy. rhonetta's got no panties on. she's got big ta-ta's. i already hate her. she's fugly as hell. and she's a snob. what she's wearing is NOT sexy. she just started singing. but that's a joke. i HATE her. simon's right. she IS bigger than most people. she SUCKS, big hairy donkey balls. she thinks she's hot and all, but she's not. paula ofers her water, and she just laughs. i HATE her. then she just stands there. and then she starts to sing again. she still SUCKS, this time it's big hippo balls. she goes out. and then she flips out! she got the most pissed i've ever seen a rejected hopeful, ever. i HATE her. she REALLY needs a reality check. i'm tired of her. i really hoped a car would have hit her...

9 are through on simon's b-day, for a total of 33 from nc. some people butcher "fame". next, san fran!

Cousin's Wedding

2009-06-24T01:35:00.002+03:00

i just came back from my cousin's wedding, and it was way fun.

that makes it 5 married cousins, all from my father's side of the family. 1 more is engaged, and of those that aren't, only 3 are older than me. i'm starting to feel the pressure. jk.

so, there were the usual meet and greet, the bride looked very lovely, and then the khuppa. for those of you not in the know, that's like walking down the aisle, and actually getting married, with the vows and all. it was scheduled to start at 8:30 pm. about an hour later, it actually started.

next, the food! yummy! then some dancing, NOT by me, some talking, and 3.5 hours after we arrived, we left. all in all, it was great, and i'm very happy for the newly weds. congrats! mazal tov!

American Idol S05E02 - Denver Auditions

2009-06-23T17:57:00.005+03:00

audition from a mile high...

DENVER -

marlows? what kind of a name is marlows? he's SO full of himself. he sucks. how does putting a inger on one ear supposed to help? he REALLY sucks. he begs. he's outta here. tiffany's stupid. she sucks. olivia sucks. david sucks. lisa's 16. with all those "credentials", why does she need this competition? she's great. simon thinks she's the best 16 year old they've ever had. after one song. she's through.

we see some of the contestants other "talents" - some dance, one does capoeira!, one is a geography freak, and some can do a backflip, and two are just wierd. amanda's kinda ugly. she sucks. ace can't be his real name, can't it? he sings westlife? oh, it brett "ace" young... he's good. randy thinks he's awesome, simon doesn't. he does like him, though. paula's hot for him. he's through. rochelle's a dumbass. why, WHY would you bring so many family members? WHY???? she does a routine. but she's alright. and AGAIN, randy thinks she's one of the best ever. she's through. so the family won't be disappointed.

a lot of people are "rockers". some "rockers" suck. did she seriously sing i wanna bo sedated? jacob's got crutches. and he uses them... he sucks. lol! "no, dude, i roooock...". and the face ryan does! lol! chris got a cool beard. he's got a rock band. he's a nice guy. he's got two stepkids, and married an older woman. awww... he sings the letter. very unique sounding "rocker" voice. scream-y at parts. but that's rock-ish. he's good. simon didn't like him. simon says no. he comes out with no ticket. then pulls it out of the hat. he's through! his wife is really emotional.

we a part of a good audition. angela sucks. eric's scared. of simon. he sucks. there's a staredown between him and simon, complete with western, "good, bad and ugly" sort of music. he starts to go. he stays. he starts to go. he stays. he asks if he should go. simon nods, smugly. lol. this is going to sound wierd. garet the cowboy is cute. there, i said it. i'm not coming out to you. but he's cute. he sings to turkeys. lol! he's nervous as hell. he's got a good voice. needs plenty of practice. that's the first time he sang infront of people. paula says no. simon says yes. he jumps up and down, and is really happy. he's never been on a plane, and he always wanted to. randy says yes. he really jumps up and down and is ecstatic. they all scream. 19 are through on the first day.

nick's stupid. he's an entrepanur? entrepreteur? entrepreneur? ben's stupid. he's an inventor. cosmic coaster? he's full of himself. "flawless" is first. he sucks. it takes him forever to start. and he sucks. ben's "invention" SUCKS. he sucks too. simon gets pissy. "you're useless, i'm bored, yes or no?". lol.

april's crazy. she sucks. simon says no, but paula and randy say yes. she's through. some girls go through. zachary's androgynous. randy's an asshole. "ARE you a girl?". and he sings "queen of the night". why would he do that? he kinda sucks. he's confident. he's outta here. he cries. he gets kinda pissed. not really, but still. a total of 18 go through on day 2, and 37 overall. next, nc! greensboro!