Glee!

WOW, it's been a long time since I've been here...

Here's a recap of what you missed -

I have a new apartment! YEAH! And two roommates, sorta. One of them's kinda weird. The other's okay. There's only 2 channels that work on the TV, neither of which is interesting. I use a netstick thingy to get online. That means I'm paying my cellphone company to surf the web. Kinda sucks.

Sports! Real's doing pretty well, and so are Maccabi Haifa. The Cavs and Heat could be doing better, and Omri Casspi's fantastic. If you don't know who that is, he's the rookie SF for the Kings. He's Israeli. And so far, he's been A LOT better than what people expected, having being picked 23rd in the last Draft. Last rookie ranking on NBA.com, he was 6th. 6th!

Athletics. I have a class, a sports/athletics class, on Sunday morning, starting at 7:30 AM. That means I need to take a train to Haifa on Saturday night. That sucks. But the class is kinda fun. We mainly run, and do all sorts of drills that have to do with running, for about 30-40 minutes, and then play, either football (soccer) or basketball. Kinda fun.

Mafia Wars. It's here, and it's here to stay. I love it. Yeah, I know, but still. I've been playing it on Facebook for three weeks or so, and I can't get enough of it. I tried some other games in the mean time, and a bit before I started MW, like FarmVille, World Cafe and such, but none of those stuck. MW is just fun.

NBA 2K10 is awesome. My Player mode in NBA 2K10 is awesome-er. Finally, a long, LONG time after every other sports series, 2K sports realized it will be a good idea to put a "create your own player and play as him for his whole career" mode in their NBA game. It still has some problems, but all in all, it's great. Lots of fun.

I kinda feel like playing D&D again. I miss is. It was loads of fun, but I just don't have the time right now. Too busy sleeping and not doing anything.

I started reading the Dexter series of books. It's every bit as good as the series, which is fantastic, and even though the main stories are very similar, it doesn't take anything away from the books, having already watched the corresponding episodes.

I'm hooked on yet another series. That makes it 25 active shows that I watch on a weekly basis, plus another one I need to catch up on. Which series do I watch? CSI(x3), Survivor, Dexter, Heroes, House, How I Met Your Mother, The Big Bang Theory, Top Gear, Chuck, American Idol, Burn Notice, Lost, Greek, Entourage, Friday Night Lights, Numb3rs, Hotel Babylon and South Park, which aren't new ones, for me, and now also FlashForward, Dollhouse, Mercy, Lie to Me and Glee. FlashForward has a very good idea, not the best of executions, but all in all, I enjoy it, and always look forward to the next episode. Dollhouse has an INCREDIBLE story, with GREAT execution, and it's now one of my favorite shows. Too bad there are only 7 episodes left, before it's kaput. Mercy is another show I don't love, but because I'm fucked up like that, I keep watching it, and will keep doing so until the last episode, probably. The same goes with Lie to Me, which, when told about, thought would be great, but the reality is that, much like Numb3rs, just runs in the background while I'm doing other stuff. And Glee. Ah, Glee. I love this show. It's just fun. It's terribly fun. The stereotypical characters might put you off, but it just helps the show, what with the story lines they've got for them. It is a little annoying that it's focused almost exclusively on Rachel and Finn (among the kids), but what are you gonna do? You have to have your main roles and your supporting roles, I guess. And now, my favorite performances from Glee, in order of broadcast:

1) "Don't Stop Believing". I love this song, and the performance was very ingenious, and very fun. My first brush with Glee was watching the Sam Tsui cover of it on YouTube, thinking that THAT was from the show, and that kinda got me watching the show.

2) "Somebody to Love". Again, another great song, and a good choreography, coupled with good singing, yet again.

3) "It's My Life" & "Confessions Part II" mash-up. I LOVE THIS! A great idea for a mash-up, and it is just so well performed. Just brilliant.

4) "You Can't Always Get What You Want". Might just be my favorite Rolling Stones song. Kind of a stretch, if we are to believe that they came up with the whole thing while waiting to go up and perform, but whatever.

5) "My Life Would Suck Without You". Very fun. And the collage of choreographies from past performances was a great idea.

AI8 Top 9 - Downloads? Huh?

This theme is basically - pick whatever song you want, if we clear it you can sing it. Wierd.

Megan's hot, but she sucks! The performance was terrible too. Allison shouldn't have played the guitar. She wasn't great on it, and it didn't help the performance. And that dress! UGH! Scott gave his best performance so far. Nice. Lil's awful. Adam's still awesome. And Paula's high. And Kara's retarded. Kris was brilliant. Never heard an arrangement of "Ain't No Sunshine" quite like that. I don't know if it came from the computer, or from outside (where there are thunders right about now), but I heard thunders as it was ending. AWESOME!

About the results show - If anyone saw "The Comebacks" - the "Don't Stop Believing" there was much better...

AI8 Top 10 - Motown

Before we get started, something about the new judge.

Kara. Kara's kinda hot. Sorta. But she's annoying. She can give good criticism, in stark comparison to the other judges. But, she's a sucker for big song-ending notes. And big notes in general. There's more to singing than that. And, during the auditions and Hollywood episodes, she used the sentence "raw, natural talent" quite often. And apparently, she doesn't know what that means. She seems to think it means whoever she told it to is great, naturally gifted, and ready to make it in the big leagues. But that's not the case. It means that, while talented, whoever she told it to still needs to refine his "raw, natural talent", and, in the contest of the series, will probably do better in a year or two. There, I'm glad I got that out of the way.

Oh, one other thing - for some reason, when going for the bigger notes, the contestants let their tongue slide out of their mouth. Slightly. Try to see it next time. Adam and Kris are two I remember doing it, on several occasions. It's kinda off-putting.

Adam was terrific. Allison was great. Kris was good. That's it. I guess...

AI8 Top 11 - Grand Ole Opry

This might become a regular thing...

Some things I noticed:

Michael sucked. Allison wasn't that great tonight. Kris keeps improving. He still makes wierd faces when singing. Lil ain't no Carrie. Adam's crazy. He's a whackjob. Lunatic. What on earth was that?!?!!?? The vocals were good, but there ain't no one on the planet that can seperate them from the arrangement. That was WIERD. And to think he might have done great with the regular version, or with a one similar to what Daughtry did/stole/whatever with I Walk the Line, back in his time. Scott ain't all that and a bag of chips. He wouldn't be here if he wasn't blind. Sorry, but that's the truth. Alexis - meh. Danny sings wityh a "growl" that sounds like he's got phlegm, i.e. like he REALLY needs to cough. Disgusting. Anoop ROCKS! Megan's hot. HOT. But she can't dance. AT ALL. And Matt was very good. That's it. for now...

AI8 Top 13 - MJ Night

I know I said I won't, but here are some things I thought about while watching this performance episode.

First off, I'm glad that it's a top 13, rather than a top 12, because the baker's dozen allows Anoop, aka Noop-Dogg, to get in, and I like him.

Now to several performances:

Kris' performance was, I thought, better than he got credit for. I know it wasn't technically the best of the night, and kinda average overall, but I loved it. LOVED it. The guitar might have seemed pointless, because it didn't really fit the song, and wasn't clearly heard AT ALL, for almost the entire song, but, speaking as someone who does (somewhat) play the guitar, I can imagine he feels much more comfortable while playing the guitar, and that helps him loosen up, and in my eyes, turn in his best performance yet, from his first audition 'till now. And you could see he was having fun. And he made funny silly faces. And the fact that he helped the others with their songs makes him just so much more awesome.

Allison, who from some angles is kinda cute, had a great performance. But I wasn't really concentrating on it, so that's it.

Anoop, I thought, didn't suck as badly as he was accused of sucking. It's a great song, and he did an OK version of it, but it wasn't terrible.

Megan's HOT. REALLY, REALLY, REALLY HOT. But that tattoo is hideous. And she can't dance.

* In earlier episodes, Nick/Norman was AWESOME! HILLARIOUS! And Neil Patrick Harris, aka Legendary Himself, Barney, was in da house, for two performance episodes. COOL *

And Adam's AWESOME.

That's it. For now...

Fuck This World...

4-0? Seriously? WTF?!?!?!?!?!?!?

Real Madrid lost to Alcorcon from the second division, group B, 4-0. WTF?!?!?!?!?!?

And to make things better, the Cavs lost their season opener to the Celtics.

Fuck this world...

Blog, Are You There? It's Me... Blogger

Hi there. It's been a while, hasn't it?

I've been quite busy, actually.

The first year of college/university ended. Sorta. I'm still trying to finish the second (third, but more of that, later) round of test (not new ones, but to improve grades and stuff). Two more are left. I'm not entirely lacking confidence. I think.

I finished basic training in the military. A month of nothing's and not-a-whole-lot's. I did shoot an M-16. A LOT. It was fun. I am now qualified to do that. But I don't have a license. Odd.

The second year of college started a couple of weeks ago. Nothing's new. All's the same.

That's basically it. I didn't get back to learning how to play the guitar. Too bad. I do want to, but I can't see myself doing it any time soon.

About American Idol - I finished watching season 7 (again-ish), and am not going to post reviews about it, or season 8 which I'm currently watching. I really don't have the mental strength and will to do that.

BUT, I will, hopefully, comment on the new season, once it will start, so that my opinion won't be years overdue.

Anything else? probably, but I can't remember. Seeya soon?

American Idol - The Thing That Should Be

Below is a list of songs that probably won't ever be performed on Idol, which is a shame. If they were sung, they will immidiately be considered awesome. Depending on how good the perormance will be, they might stay that way, too.

More Than a Feeling - Boston
The Boys Are Back in Town - Thin Lizzy
Buddy Holly - Weezer
Sweet Child O' Mine - Guns 'n' Roses. That would be SO AWESOME!
Paradise City - Guns 'n' Roses. And any G'N'R, really.
Smells Like Teen Spirit - Nirvana
Any Nirvana, actually.
Metallica. Something? Anything?
Led Zeppelin. Other than once in the 8th season, nothing!
Rockstar - Nickleback. I know, i know, but this song has a special place in my heart...
Lynyrd Skynyrd - NOT ENOUGH!
ZZ Top - Especially Sharp Dressed Man, David Cook's performance of it with ZZ Top was awesome.
Stan - Eminem. I know it doesn't really fit, but this song gives me the chills EVERY SINGLE TIME.
Tears In Heaven - Eric Clapton. Ditto.
Hotel California - The Eagles. LOVE IT. Also, a good version of Desperado, to get us all to forget the catastrophe that was the third season...
House of the Rising Sun - The Animals. DITTO.
Some more Bob Marley, Bob Dylan, Beatles (and solo careers).
The Rolling Stones. PLEASE! Gimme more! PLEASE!
AC/DC? Maybe? Highway to Hell and Back in Black, expecially.
Some more Hallelujah, the Jeff Buckley arrangement. That's just so awesome.
Ziggy Stardust - David Bowie. He played guitar! Me likey. Plenty of other great ones from him.
Queen. Just more please.
Ramones. Just. Fucking. Awesome.
Red Hot Chili Peppers. More. More. More.
Wonderwall - Oasis.
Time of Your Life - Green Day. The Good Riddance one. Great. Great. Great.
I Love Rock 'n' Roll - Joan Jett. Coolness.
Aerosmith. YEAH! There are more than enough in seasons 7 and 8, but still!
Van Halen. Anything that's not You Really Got Me. Too much painful memories.
If someone goes out and does a heavy metal, Pantera or something, that'd be awesome. a terrible trainwreck, probably, but an awesome one at least.
The Allman Brothers Band. Pretty please?
Looser - Beck. I'm a looser baby, so why don't you kill me? LOL!
I Wanna Be Your Dog - The Stooges. Just for randy's comments.
Thirteen - Big Star. September Gurls would be fine too.
(Don't Fear) The Reaper - Blue Oyster Cult. Love it.
Surrender - Cheap Trick. Just do it.
Bon Jovi. Other than the season 6 Bon Jovi week, what?
On the Road Again - Willie Nelson. Yeah.
Jimi Hendix. I would LOVE to hear a guitar solo of his on Idol.
The Clash. U-huh.
Cream - Anything. Eric Clapton too.
Leonard Cohen. The best thing to come out of canada, and all you've got is one Hallelujah? And it's the Jeff Buckley version! (I have absolutely nothing against that version, in fact I love it...)
Proud Mary - Creedence Clearwater Revival. The CCR version. Complete with "Proud Mary keep on boinin'". lol!
Smoke on the Water - Deep Purple. I'll even play the bass part. Or at least the part of the base part that i actually know.
American Pie - Don McLean. All he's got on the show is vincent? seriously?
Depeche Mode. Personal jesus. Or the other good one. The "All i ever wanted" one.
RAP! HA!
The Doors. Just one tiny light my fire? COME ON!
Take Me Out - Franz Ferdinand. Who cares that their namesake was murdered? And that led to WWI (or WWII, don't remember which)?
Truckin' - Greatful Dead. Yep.
ABC - The Jackson 5. They really were great, back when they were all black.
Soul Man, and Solomon Burke's Everybody Needs Somebody to Love. NOT as group performances.
Pink Houses - John Mellencamp. Love it.
Spirit in the Sky - Norman Greenbaum. Brilliant.
Lola - The Kinks. Great. Just great.
Layla - Derek and the Dominos. Again, just great.
Behind Blue Eyes - Limp Bizkit. I LOVE it.
Ace of Spades - Motorhead.
All the Young Dudes - Mott the Hoople. With a song and band names like those two, how can you not love it?
I'm a Believer - The Monkees. A good, non-karaoke version.
Rockin' in the Free World - Neil Young. Hot. Hot. Hot.
Iris - Goo Goo Dolls. Great. Really great.
Hey There Delilah - Plain White T's. Very excellent, as randy once said. One doesn't count.
Hey Ya - Outkast. Kinda rap, but it's great!
How 'bout some Pink Floyd? huh?
Losing My Religion - REM. One of their best, if not the best.
I'm Too Sexy, Baby Got Back, Big Poppa - Just for the LOL factor.
The Sex Pistols. Just oh so great.
The Smiths? Maybe?
Black Hole Sun - Soundgarden. That'd be cool.
Sum 41. Fat Lip, or In Too Deep, expecially.
My Sharona - The Knack. So that simon can call whoever did it the next Prince, only to see him get out the next results show.
Keep On Runnin' - The Spencer Davis Group. If only because i can't find this anywhere.
Some Stevie Ray Vaughan.
Free Fallin' - Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers. Jus' 'cause.
Sweet Jane - The Velvet Underground. Yeah...
Bittersweet Symphony - The Verve. How cool is it that Richards and Jagger got co-writing credit?
Dance to the Music - Sly & the Family Stone. Would be fun to see.
Play That Funky Music - Wild Cherry. LOL... I know it's been done, twice, but still!
Do You Believe in Magic - The Lovin' Spoonful. I just like it...
Fake Plastic Trees - Radiohead.
For What It's Worth - Buffalo Springfield.
Fortunate Son - CCR.
Slow Ride - Foghat.
Fuck the Police - NWA. It would have to be pretaped, but it would be FUNNY to hear more bleeps than actual lyrics. LOL!
Go Your Own Way - Fleetwood Mac. If not Nadia, then someone, please?
Beach Boys. No one? No one?!?!?
Hit the Road Jack - Ray Charles. Who wouldn't want to hear more backup than actual singing by the contestant?
All Star - Smash Mouth. Why not? Just give it a try!
Eye of the Tiger - Survivor. Ditto. Why not?
U2 - Two songs don't count!
The Reason - Hoobastank. It's just stuck in my head... I think it's great.
Bad Day - Daniel Powter
Shine On You Crazy Diamond - Pink Floyd. Just to see someone TRY and cut down this song, from 26:11 to 90 seconds. ROFL!

that's it for now... a pretty hefty list, if i may add...

A Wierd Taste In Music

That's right. I've got an eclectic (read: W-I-E-R-D) taste in music. I like just about anything. Except Mizrahit. I used to like it. A bit. I hate it now...

A small taste of my taste - the Beatles, the Rolling Stones, the Who, Bob Dylan, Bob Marley, AC/DC, Led Zeppelin, Pink Floyd, Red Hot Chili Peppers, U2, some ZZ Top, some Oasis, some Animals, some Elvis, some Eminem, some Guns 'n' Roses, some Metallica, Nirvana, Eric Clapton, Aerosmith, some Green Day, some Coldplay, some Radiohead, Queen, some Deep Purple, some Weezer, some REM, some Soundgarden, some Santana, some Jimi Hendrix, John Lennon, Paul McCartney, some George Harrison, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Neil Young, the Monkees, and more!

YEAH, I know...

As proof of this varied taste of mine, the next entry will be a list of songs I would like to see and hear performed on American Idol. and well.

In Haifa...

I'm in Haifa today.

I'm staying in a friend's appartment. I was supposed to stay with my uncle and aunt, and their son and daughter, but that didn't go through...

On the train, I met 2 girls I went to high school and middle school with. One's REALLY hot. The other, not so much. I haven't seen them in a year or so. It was kinda cool. We talked. That's it.

I'm now in a shitty appartment in Nesher, which is basically the same as Haifa, but not really. Oh well.

Tomorrow, I need to go to a course from the army, I dunno... Something about how to write your CV. BUT I'M NOT EVEN 19!!! AND I WON'T BE LOOKING FOR A JOB IN THE NEXT 9 YEARS!!! I dunno...

Anyway, there are some good news. My cousin was sick for the last week or so. He had really high fever. The doctors didn't know if it was swine flu or not. Today I found out he's healthy again. YAY!

Alright, that's it. I think...

American Idol

That's it. I'm really done now. No more of this frm me. Buh bye!

American Idol S06E20 - Top 12

We are finally here. The top 12. And theme weeks. This week, it's Diana Ross, and she's helping the kids.

First though, some pimping of the show and it's alumni. Then it's a tour of the stage. Then, after some banter, some pimping of Diana Ross. And then we see her meet the top 12.

1) Brandon - "Can't Hurry Love" by The Supremes. The start, with the back to the audience, SUCKED. Not good at all. And he forgot the lyrics. And let it show.

COCA COLA! The hardest part of the competition for Melinda's the high heels and dresses. LOL. Ryan asks Simon to give her pointers about the high heels. LOL. Simon says Ryan should know. LOL. Ryan tells Simon to stay out of his closet. LOL. Simon tells Ryan to come out of it. ROFL!!! Melinda's embarassed as heck.

2) Melinda - "Home" by Diana Ross. She's too good for AI. She's a great singer, a great performer, and yet she's incredibly shy and cute. Amazing... And she doesn't know how good she is. And she made Paula cry. How can you not love her???

3) Chris S. - "Endless Love" by Diana Ross & Lionel Richie. He looks wierd sans-glasses. T'was a'ight.

4) Gina - "Love Child" by the Supremes. Loud. Not terrible.

5) Sanjaya - "Ain't No Mountain High Enough" by Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell. What happened to his hair??? It SUCKED! The "dancing" too. And the ending. Yuck...

COCA COLA! Nothing interesting...

6) Haley - "Missing You" by Diana Ross. Breathy. That can really drive me crazy. And she effed the lyrics. Simon made her cry, by giving her compliments!

7) Phil - "I'm Gonna Make You Love Me" by the Supremes & the Temptations. Creepy. Good, but creepy.

8) LaKisha - "God Bless the Child" by Billie Holiday. WOW...

COCA COLA! Blake listens to "cool" music.

9) Blake - "You Keep Me Hanging On" by the Supremes. Wierd. Good, but wierd.

10) Stephanie - "Love Hangover" by Diana Ross. Pretty good. I guess.

11) Chris R. - "The Boss" by Diana Ross. Pretty weak. I dunno...

12) Jordin - "If We Hold On Together" by Diana Ross. Very good. Very very good.

1. Melinda

2. LaKisha

3. Jordin

4. Stephanie

5. Blake

6. Phil

7. Gina

8. Chris S.

9. Chris R.

10. Haley

11. Brandon

12. Sanjaya

Real Madrid - Toronto FC

Real Madrid beat Toronto FC 5-1 a few hours ago. WOOHOO!!!

Some observations:

* Cristiano Ronaldo's getting more and more comfortable. It's going to be scary!

* Raul's AWESOME! He just never seases to work and amaze me.

* Kaka's brilliant. He didn't have the best of games, as it was his first in Real, but he organised the offensive game so well, and rarely made a mistake.

* IKER!!! ALBIOL!!! ARBELOA!!! All these three played their first game for Real (for Iker it was the first game n this preseason), and all played well, though they didn't shine, as they weren't called for any heroic actions/whatever.

* Lass. Lass. Lass. The guy's the closest thing I've ever seen to Makalele, without actually being Makalele. BRILLIANT.

* Guti doesn't suck. He had some good actions, but not enough to warrant a starting role when the actual season starts.

* Benzema's really good. He's not just a target striker, he can start attacks too, and do it well. He can also play near the sidelines, which is an advantage.

* Granero. MY GOD, Granero... The guy can play EVERY single offensive position, and play it well. I'm so glad Real bought him back.

* Sneijder continues to work hard every second he's on the pitch.

* Robben, when healthy, is one of the best players in the world, especially when he's not locked into selfish mode.

* Xabi Alonso. Perfect. Didn't do a whole lot offensively, but whenever he got the ball, he did EXACTLY what he should have, and he played good defense.

* Miguel Torres was the captain, after Raul, Iker and Guti came off the pitch. SERIOUSLY???

* Negredo's good. Very good. Good enough to stay? Probably not...

Next game's sunday night (Israel time), in Washingtn DC, against DC United. Seeya then!

PS - According to the Spanish newspaper As, Perez has closed the terms of Ribery's contract (5 years, beginning next season) with the player and his agent, and predictions are that Bayern Munich will agree to sell the player next summer for 25 M Euros. WOW...

Real Madrid Background

As you probably know by know, I'm a Real Madrid fan.

I wanted to have a background about Real, with the new purchases, as well as the best players that were already here, and decided that instead of asking for someone to make/find me one, I'd do it myself.

And this is the result.

I mysel am very proud of it, as it is the first thing I made using photoshop in 5 years or so, and I never really sat down to learn how to use the program well.

And this is where you come in. If anyone's reading this, please take a look and tell me what you think. It's kinda important for me...

American Idol S06E19 - Top 16 Results

16 become 12 as the semifinalists are revealed.

GROUP PERFORMANCE: "Stuck in the Middle With You" by Stealers Wheel. Very cool song, cool performance.

Then it's a recap of the performances.

Results! LaKisha and Blake join Ryan at centerstage. They're both through. Chris S.'s next. Ryan gives him a heart-attack. After the break, he's through. Jordin's next. And through. Phil's next. He's nervous. He's through. He's shocked. Jared's next. And he's outta here! He sings.

American Idol Challenge, again. This one's the easiest so far... It's C, dumbass.

Melinda and Brandon are up. And through. Chris R. and Gina are next. And through.

A pause in the results, as we see a clip about Carrie. AND SHE'S HERE!!! I LOVE HER!!! GUEST SONG: "Wasted" by Carrie Underwood. She's still hot and beautiful. And great.

Back to the results. Antonella and Stephanie join Ryan at centerstage. Antonella's outta here. Stephanie's through. Antonella sings.

Haley and Sabrina are next. They're both crying. Haley's through. Sabrina's outta here.

This is AI's 200th episode. WOW... The surprise is that they are going to do a telethon thing in the top 6 stage - Idol Gives Back. Cool. Borat will be there, as will Gwen Stefani, Pink, Bono and others. COOL!

Sanjaya and Sundance are the last ones left. Sundance's outta here. Sanjaya's through. Sundance sings. And it was AWESOME. We see the ousted's journeys on Idol.

American Idol S06E18 - Top 16: Top 8 Girls

8 girls, blah blah blah...

Paula was missing because she gave Randy a BJ. I didn't say that...

1) Jordin - "Heartbreaker" by Pat Benatar. She's a football fan! DUDE! AWESOME! It was really fun. I really like this song, and I really like it on her.

2) Sabrina - "Don't Let Go (Love)" by En Vogue. Meh. Screechy.

3) Antonella - "Put Your Records On" by Corinne Bailey Rae. She's really, REALLY hot. AND she sucks! HA!

4) Haley - "If My Heart Had Wings" by Faith Hill. People say she's hot. I don't get people.

5) Stephanie - "Sweet Things" by Chaka Khan.

6) LaKisha - "I Have Nothing" by Whitney Houston. She's terrified of animals. LOL.

7) Gina - "Call Me When You're Sober" by Evanescence. I really like this song.

8) Melinda - "I'm a Woman" by Peggy Lee. Her OCD's so cute. The performance was AWESOME!

1. Melinda

2. Gina

3. LaKisha

4. Jordin

5. Sabrina

6. Stephanie

7. Haley

8. Antonella

American Idol S06E17 - Top 16: Top 8 Guys

8 guys are left. Tonight they perform.

1) Blake - "All Mixed Up" by 311. And in tonight's filler segments, we'll get to know the contestants better. YAY! Blake loves improv comedy, and Halloween is the best time of the year for him. The breathing noises at the start sucked. Once he got going, it was very nice. Not a great song, not great singing, not too difficult, either, but it was nice. Randy loved it, even though he didn't recognize the song. Paula's interested. Simon agrees with the other two.

COCA COLA! Sundance was emotional in the previous results show, because Chris R. was crying. Sanjaya looks like a chick. He was shocked that he got through last week.

2) Sanjaya - "Waiting on the World to Change" by John Mayer. He can Hula. He really is the girliest dude ever. And, in accordance with the girly-ness of his, he sucks. Get it? Get it? That really was terrible. Randy doesn't see anything special about him, and he used to. Paula's speechless. Simon says it wasn't as bad as last week, and calls him on his Paula hairstyle. And then the ever gay Ryan comes up on stage and announces he's sure one of the two (Paula and Sanjaya) has extensions, but he's not sure which one. ROFL!

3) Sundance - "Jeremy" by Pearl Jam. He "reveals" that he wears a fat-suit when he's on the show. Ha. Ha. Ha. Who sings Pearl Jam on the Idol? I mean, the song's great. The video of it is even better. But to sing it on Idol? It was precisely what you'd expect it to be - shouty, loud, incoherent at parts, and quite a mess. But it's a great song! Randy loves that he put a southern rock thing on a Pearl Jam song. Paula's redundant. Simon didn't like it as much as last week.

Travis Tritt's in the house, and Randy's working on his next album.

4) Chris R. - "Tonight I Wanna Cry" by Keith Urban. He used to be "chunky". And he lost 40 pounds. WOW. There's something wierd about his vibrato or falsetto or both. I dunno. Last week he was great. This week he was just OK. Randy thinks he's in it to win it. Duh. Paula's "smart". Simon thinks it was good, but he's not jumping out of his chair.

All the guys do the "Jared Cotter Face Mask". Ha.

5) Jared - "If You Really Love Me" by Stevie Wonder. He played college basketball. Cool. And he does a forced "sexy" Stevie song. He just relies to heavily on the female vote. And there are a lot of girls that aren't impressed by the whole playing with the camera/Jarred-Cotter-face-mask thing, and won't vote for him. Or at least I hope so. Randy thought he gave a solid performance and it was actually good. Paula's helpful! Simon understands Paula. AH!

Phil kisses the judges' asses. Brandon too, I think.

6) Brandon - "I Just Want to Celebrate" by Rare Earth. He's a classical piano player. I dunno. Ugh. Ummm... I guess it was alright, but there was nothing to it. He just sang it. He sang it well enough, but something's missing. I dunno. Randy thought he messed the end.

Alright. I'm done. I give up. I'm tired of this. I am now officially stopping doing this as I have so far. I will just post the rating for each performance episode. I'll write a short recap of each results show, but none of this in depth thing any more. I'll tell you the truth, the main reason I started doing this was because there weren't any of this things to be found for the first several seasons, but there are more than enough for this season onwards. So I'm done-ish.

7) Phil - "I Need You" by LeAnn Rimes. He used to have hair, and Randy was in Journey.

8) Chris S. - "Wanna Be Loved" by dc Talk. I really like this dude.

1. Chris S.

2. Blake

3. Chris R.

4. Sundance

5. Brandon

6. Jared

7. Phil

8. Sanjaya

American Idol S06E16 - Top 20 Results

20 hopefuls stand before us. 4 will be shot to death for our viewing pleasure. Well, not really, but you know...

American Idol Challenge and Kelli Pickler. Can't wait.

More than 32 million votes were phoned/texted in. We get a recap of the performances that earned those votes.

GROUP PERFORMANCE: "Joy to the World" by Three Dogs Night. Jeremiah was a bullfrog! WOOHOO!!! That was very good! Very fun! YAY!

The guys are nervous. FORD! Phil's safe. Chris S.'s safe. Sundance's safe. Blake's safe. Jared joins Ryan at centerstage. And he's safe. Ryan asks Nick to stand and immediately shatters his dreams. He's outta here. He's told he sucks by the judges. And he sings.

The girls are sad. Stephanie's safe. Gina's safe. Sabrina's safe. Melinsda's safe. Alaina's outta here. She's happy with the experience. She sings.

American Idol Challenge - Another stupid question. And another B.

Kelli Pickler's here! She's HAWT! Her boobs are bigger. Hmmm... HAWT! She tried sushi for the first time. And she talks about spider sushi. She bought shoes. Just shoes. GUEST SONG: "I Wonder" by Kelli Pickler.

The boys are up again. Chris R.'s safe. Brandon's safe. Sanjaya and AJ are the only ones left, and they join Ryan at centerstage. AJ's outta here. Sanjaya's safe. He's shocked. AJ's not so much. He sings.

Back to the girls. LaKisha's safe. Haley's safe. Antonella, Leslie and Jordin join Ryan at centerstage. Antonella's safe. Leslie's outta here. Jordin's safe. Gina's crying. We see Nick, Alaina, AJ and Leslie's journeys on Idol. Yep, Daughtry's still singing "Home". Leslie sings.

American Idol S06E15 - Top 20: Top 10 Girls

FINALLY, I'm back to reviewing AI. That was a long hiatus...

Ten girls are left. Not for long, though... We get some banter between the judges and Ryan. I'm bored already.

1) Gina - "Alone" by Heart. Again with the dedication bullshit? Gina dedicates this performance to her boyfriend. Bored. Carrie did this song. It was one of her best performance. And Gina dares try it??? She wasn't bad. She was actually sorta good. Not Carrie good, but good. Randy calls it pitchy to begin with. Paula's stunned-ish. Simon thought it was forced at the end. Randy tries for a LONG time to make fun of Simon's fashion sense, unsuccessfully. Paula doesn't do a better job, either.

COCA COLA! Ryan's got the hots for LaKisha.

2) Alaina - "Not Ready to Make Nice" by Dixie Chicks. She dedicates the song to her mom. Bored. She's really pushing for some sympathy/whatever votes. HAND GESTURES!!! ARGH!!! It was pitchy throughout. The song choice was kinda nice, but she had some enunciation and phrasing problems with it. She ran out of air. It was pretty bad. Randy thought the tuning and pitch went away at the chorus, and thought it was a mess. Paula's comforting. Simon compares it to Randy running in a 100 m race.

3) LaKisha - "Midnight Train to Georgia" by Gladys Knight & the Pips. She's dedicating the song to her grandmother. NICE. GREAT song choice. Remember when Paris sang it last season? Well, LaKisha was even better. It was REALLY good. Great. Fantastic. I L-U-V LaKisha. Randy thought it was HAWT. Paula's mumbling. Simon thought it wasn't as good as last week.

And the Ryan's proving he's gay. He's joined by Simon in the circle of gayness VERY quickly, though. So don't be sad for him. Or perhaps be even sadder?

4) Melinda - "My Funny Valentine" by Mitzi Green. She dedicates this performance to her Gayle's. HUH? This is where previous performances come in to help you - the last to perform this song was Constantine. There's no way in hell this is gonna pale in comparison to THAT... And it doesn't. It's brilliant. Fantastic. Awesome. She's almost too good for this show. Scratch that, She IS too good for this show. Randy called it unbelievable. Paula's applauding. Simon calls in incredible. Melinda's shocked.

5) Antonella - "Because You Love Me" by Celine Dion. She's nervous. She's HOT! She dedicates the song to her brother, Vincenzo. Vincenzo? SERIOUSLY??? She sucks. She's just terrible. But she's HOT. It was really, REALLY awful. It was painful at places. Randy says the song was way too big for her, and the pitch was all over the place. Paula's a moron. Simon thought it just wasn't good enough.

6) Jordin - "Reflection" by Christina Aguilera. She dedicates the song to her younger brother, whose name is apparently Blowjob. I dunno. It was a bit erratic at places, but overall very good. Not Melinda good, or LaKisha good, but very good. She cries. Randy thought it was pitchy at places, but he's very impressed by her. Paula's sick. Simon thought it was excellent, when compared to some of the others.

Kelli will make an appearance in the results show! WOOHOO! Stephanie says the girls aren't competitive.

7) Stephanie - "Dangerously In Love" by Beyonce. She dedicates the song to her parents. Bored. The song sucks. She did what she could with it, but the song REALLY sucked! Randy thought she sang her face off. Paula's drunk. Simon's drunk. He thought it was terrific.

Leslie's awkward as heck...

8) Leslie - "Feeling Good" by Nina Simone. She dedicates the song to her grandfather. This song? Again? The beginning, with the long violin note in the background, was wierd. It picked up a bit, and she ended better than she started, but it was just there. Eh. Meh. Bleh. Whatever. The scatting was terrible. Like REALLY bad. Randy thought it was pitchy. It was just a'ight for him. Paula's stupid. Simon says (LOL!) Paula liked it because the skatting sounded like Paula's talking. BURN! He thought she's getting lost, having followed better performances.

Ryan recites Leslie's skatting. Ha.

9) Haley - "Queen of the Night" by Whitney Houston. She dedicates it to her fiancee. Awww. Bored. Why Whitney? Why would she do that to herself? It was "jumpy", "whore-y", "shouty", "pitchy", "insert not favorable adjective here-y". Not really good. Not at all. SHOCKER! She lied about her fiancee being away! He's right there in the audience! Randy thought it was a more background than lead singer song, and that it wasn't great. Paula's deaf. Simon gives her "A" for effort, thought it was manic verging at insane at points. And that it paled in comparison.

10) Sabrina - "All the Man That I Need" by Whitney Houston. She's dedicating the song to her grandmother. She's arrogant. I hate her. She smiles too much. The song's terrible. She did OK. I really couldn't care, though. The ending sucked. Randy says something about something. Paula's happy. Simon thought she was on the limit of shouting.

1. Melinda

2. LaKisha

3. Jordin

4. Gina

5. Sabrina

6. Stephanie

7. Haley

8. Leslie

9. Alaina

10. Antonella

Football News!

Maccabi Haifa, after a goal-less tie in Kazakhstan last week, found themselves 3 goals down after just 15 minutes tonight in Haifa.

God that sucked.

But, eventually, after many stressful minutes, Maccabi was finally able to come away with a 4-3 victory, and the ticket to the next round. Phew...

It just seemed, for the first quarter of an hour of the game, that the people over at Maccabi just forgot that, usually, the other team can attack as well. After that initial shock, Haifa actually started playing football, and quite well at times.

Let's just say I'm glad that's over...

And in Real Madrid news - XABI ALONSO!!!! Liverpool and Real have come to an agreement for the purchase of the basque by the Spanish club, for a sum of 30 million Euros, according to the Spanish media. YAY!!!! NOW I'm happy. NOW the team's completed. NOW Real can start kicking some major ass (*fingers crossed*)!

News!

News! That's right, news!

What I've done recently - NOTHING! JK...

* I saw Fanboys. And can I just say, I LOVE geek jokes. Geek jokes are the best. Geek jokes rock!

* I had a test, in Solid Mechanics, and I did alright, I think. No more test for a month (Probably)!

* I moved out of my dorm room, and as of now will not be able to get a dorm room next year. DAMN. I need to start looking for an apartment soon. I dunno...

* I saw Knocked Up. Seth Rogen's not easy to look at. He's kinda ugly. BUT! He's funny. Really funny. The whole "team", Jay, Jason, Seth, Martin and Jonah, are funny people. Really funny. And Paul Rudd's a good actor. Funny, in a different way. And not as much. But still. And Katherine Heigl's HAWT!

* I also saw Observe and Report. That movie made no sense. It's Seth Rogen's version of Paul Blart: Mall Cop. It's funny at parts. And makes no sense at others. What ev...

* I ALSO saw Road Trip: Beer Pong. GOD, that sucked. Road Trip was really good. Euro Trip was pretty good. This movie just sucked. Everything about it sucked. Except for the tits. They were awesome.

* Real Madrid news - Alvaro Arbeloa was purchased! Yay! Gabriel Heinze left for Marseille. OK. Parejo was transfered to Getafe, with an option of re-purchase for the first 2 years. Good. Alberto Bueno wasn't a Real Madrid player for several weeks when I last wrote about Real. He's now in Valladolid. Again, Real has a re-purchase option, for some duration of time. I think. AND! Xabi Alonso's transfer to Madrid is reportedly all but agreed upon. He stayed in Spain, while the team, Liverpool, returned to England. I just hope he signs for Real soon.

That's it. I think. Oh well...

Real Madrid Round Up

So, where are we currently standing?

Real Madrid currently has 30 or so players on its rosters, at least 5 of which have got to go before August 31st (well, actually, before September 1st, but who wants all that last minute scrambling, any way?).

And the players are the following: Iker Casillas, Jerzey Dudek, Michel Salgado, Sergio Ramos, Raul Albiol, Miguel Torres, Christoph Metzelder, Pepe, Gabriel Heinze, Marcelo, Eziquiel Garay, Roysthon Drenthe, Mahmadou Diarra, Lassana Diarra, Fernando Gago, Dani Parejo, Wesley Sneijder, Rafael Van der Vaart, Guti, Kaka, Arjen Robben, Cristiano Ronaldo, Raul, Gonzalo Higuain, Ruud Van Nistelrooy, Klaas Jan Huntelaar, Karim Benzema, Alvaro Negredo, Esteban Granero and Alberto Bueno.

Sure fire to be in the squad next season - Iker (no explanation needed), Dudek (just signed an extension, will be the second GK), Sergio Ramos (come on), Raul Albiol (15 M and will leave?), Torres (rotation), Pepe (one of the best in the world at his position), Lass (one of the sole rays of light from last season), Kaka (COME ON!), C. Ronaldo (SERIOUSLY!), Raul (DUDE!), Higuain (the other ray of light...), Benzema (MAN!) and Granero (just bought and coach likes). 12.

Who else? Salgado, Marcelo, Gago, Sneijder, Guti. They'll probably stay. 17. Either Hienze will stay or someone will be purchased (Arbeloa) to replace him. 18. Metzelder, I guess. 19. Ruud and Mahmadou seem to be staying. 21. Garay, too. 22.

On the outs are Drenthe (almost certain), Parejo (already out), VdV (probably), Robben (probably not), Huntelaar (most definitely), Negredo (question of time) and Bueno (back to Castilla/loan thingy to another club).

Assuming Robben stays, 23. Add to that Xabi Alonso (*fingers crossed*), and that's 24. And keep VdV for good measure. 25. Success! Now, if only it were this easy in real life...

On a side note, and a completely unrelated one at that, I HATE LAPORTA! The president of Barcelona. I HATE HIM!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! He said Real's purchases were imperialistic, said that Barca doesn't buy players, it grows them, and then goes and almost, ALMOST, offers 92 MILLION EUROS!!! for Ibrahimovic. Then, Eto'o appears to have agreed to move to Inter, so it's only going to cost Barca 40 M. And he dares to say that this buy isn't expensive. I HATE HIM!!!!!!! *fingers crossed the deals falls through, and Zlatan stays in Inter*

Some Stuff...

MOVIES!

I recently watched, and quite enjoyed, the following films -

• 17 Again - Nice little idea, not great execution...
• Angels & Demons - Okay, the film wasn't great, but I just loved the book, and therefor had to like the movie...
• Fast and Furious - The previous were better, but I liked the "reunion" and all. Though Michelle Rodriguez's role was irrelevent, and not needed, really...
• Fired Up - I usually hate films where the antagonists are "awesome" and everything goes their way, except for one small thing, and this is one of those films. But I liked it.
• Ghosts of Girlfriends Past - Another one of the aformentioned type of films. And to top it if, it's a pure and unadultered chick flick. Not that good. My sister would love it.
• Land of the Lost - Crazy. Stupid. Hot chick. Two funny actors. What's not to like?
• Step Brothers - Crazy. Stupid. Two funny actors. An a capella version of "Sweet Child O' Mine". What's not to like?
• Terminator: Salvation - My first foray into Terminator territory. There. I said it. As such, EVERYTHING was new to me, and I quite enjoyed it.
• The Hangover - Doug, the guy getting married was in National Treasure. Yeah. This movie is LOL-inducing. Seriously. I was sitting in my room, at 3 AM, laughing out loud. Seriously.
• Three Kings - Released 10 years ago, and watched it just this week. I kinda liked it. Not really, but kinda.

CAR!

We got our old car back... BTW...

TV!

Shows I am watching update - Hotel Babylon (British people are the coolest), Entourage (YEAH!), Top Gear (see: Hotel Babylon), Burn Notice, Greek, Survivor, CSI, CSI: Miami, CSI: NY, South Park, American Idol, Chuck, Dexter (DAMN!), Friday Night Lights, Heroes, House, How I Met Your Mother (awesome, suit up!, and other apropriate Barney-isms), Lost, Numb3rs, The Big Bang Theory, The Simpsons and Futurama. Wheeooo....

GUITAR!

I am making zero progress. BUT! I have found a good place to learn from (for free, too!). After the last test (Next Sunday), I'll start working harder on improving.

HEADPHONES!

UPDATE: NONE of my headphones work. The set I am currently using, I have to twist the cord to get the right earpiece to work. ARGH!!! I really need to buy new ones...

That's it. You may proceed whatever it was you were doing before you stumbled upon this fascinating piece of information. Dismissed.

New Car, For Now...

We got a new car.

Well, not really. Our car's in the garage, and because it's leased, they gave us a new one. It's one of those HYOOOGE Chevrolet SUV/Minivans. Dunno what's it called.

The only good thing about it, is the stereo. It can play MP3 CDs. That's it. Yeah.

I pretty much hate it, and am anxiously waiting for the return of our car, a Honda FRV. MUCH better.

Though, I'll admit, if I had to, I could get used to the monster we have right now...

How I Met Your Mother

I admit. I didn't want to watch this series. I thought the idea was lame.

I watched it. It was, to quote a great character, "legen, wait for it, and you better not be lactose intolerant, 'cause the second half of the word is - dary!". LOL!

This show is awesome. Barney's awesome. And Robin's hot, even though she's Canadian (in real life too...).

I finished all four seasons available, and am now waiting for the 5th season's premiere, somewhere in September... Booo....

Glantoren 0-4 Maccabi Haifa

I'm still not sure how to write that Northern Irish team's name, but as of today, I won't need to either.

Maccabi Haifa just beat them, 4 goals to nil.

Again, the match was pretty boring, and Haifa easily beat their opponent.

Next up, another team whose name I don't know how to write! They're the Kazakh champions, apparently. I dunno...

Shamrock Rovers 0-1 Real Madrid

YAY!!!!! WOOHOO!!!!!!!!!

Real Madrid just beat Shamrock Rovers, 1 goal to nil. Yeah, I know, it's not really impressive, but it's just the first game, they still need to gel.

Good things - Cristiano Ronaldo. YEAH! Raul's looking good. Lass is still good. Sneijder and VDV were impressive. Benzema showed glimpses of what he can do, scored the only goal, and was one of the best players tonight. Parejo was pretty good.

Bad things - Defense. A normal team would have scored against Real tonight, at least once. Gago's trying too hard, Higuain not enough.

All in all, not a great match, and I'm looking forward to the next match, in which Kaka, Casillas, Ramos and Albiol should be playing.

Maccabi Haifa 6-0 Gelantorn

Maccabi Haifa just thrashed Gelantorn, the Northern Irish champion, 6 goals to nil.

The first half was mainly disappointment, with some good moments, but not a lot. The second half was much better, with 5 of the goals coming in those 45 minutes.

Haifa played very well, especially in the 2nd half, but the opponent weren't of a good enough quality to be able to say that they are in good shape. Hopefully though, after the rest that will be next week's leg 2 match, the players will be more than well rested, and will come to the next round prepared.

With this victory, Maccabi are all but through to the 3rd Round of qualifications to the Champions League. *fingers crossed that they get to the group stage!* *knock on wood*

The two new players in the club, Teixeira and Dablishvili, both started, and debuted, and both played well, with the Georgian striker being more impressive.

He scored 2 goals, joined on the scoring sheet by Refaelov, Katan, Arbeitman and Gadir.

I'M HAPPY!!!

Bored and Tired

Yes, I'm bored and tired as FUCK!

Some good news though:

* I have decided that I want to study. I KNOW! I will finish my degree, if they let me that is, and I will go to classes and do the homework necessary. YAY! And next semester, it will be easier to do all that, as I will share a room and live next to friends, one of which has the same "major" as I do (it's not really a major, but that's the closest thing to it, and the only way I can explain it.).

* There was a physics test on Wednesday. I barely studied, being stupid like that, but it was still a'ight. The problem was the fucking test. The teachers got it about 10 minutes before the test started, so they didn't get a chance to go over it. Because of that, they cancelled one question, out of ten, mid-way through the test. Of the other 9, I knew i got 3 right, was sort of sure about 2 others, and really guessed the other 4. It is 2 days later, and they decided to axe 4 questions and give everyone the 40 points (in one of those, they accepted 2 answers). In the end, yours truly, according to the answers published and the questions cancelled, should get a 90. WOOHOO! And I think they got one of the answers wrong, which would mean I'd get 100. WOOHOO!

* Benzema was presented last night as a Real Madrid player. "Only" 30,000 fans came to see him. Poor boy. No number yet for him, as he is waiting to see which players leave and which numbers free up before deciding (9 and 10, his previous numbers, are currently occupied).

* Real Madrid's pre-season has officially started today, with almost all the players, minus Iker, Sergio Ramos, Albiol, Kaka and a couple of youngsters-ish, practicing together for the first time. Yes, CR9's there. Yes, Benzema's there. And yes, Raul's there. The missing players got a permission to extend their vacations due to playing for their international team/sub-21 international team. They will be back before the month's over. YAY!

* The draw for the order of games in La Liga next season will take place today. I will post back with important dates, such as the Clasico, derbys, and such.

* Dexter. O. M. G. I saw the first episode, and was head over heels in love with this show. I am now about half way through the second season (12 episodes per), and I can honestly say I love this show. Michael C. Hall's one of the best actors on TV, and the two chicks closest to Dexter, Deb and Rita, dunno the actresses' names, are seriously hot, in a not-the-best-tits-and-not-the-most-beautiful-but-still-really-hot kinda way. I can almost, ALMOST, imagine myself actually dating someone that looks like on of them. Why almost? Well, that's a whole 'nother subject, I'm not quite ready to share with the world. All 3 of you reading. That's probably about 3 more than are really reading...

* The next test is in 3 days or so, and I don't know a single thing. I think I may have to do a Moed B, which is to say do the test again at a later date. It actually be a Moed C, as I will be in bootcamp (probably) when the Moed B will take place.

* Oh, yeah. Bootcamp. About that. In a couple of months or so, I will be whisked off for 4 weeks, and go through bootcamp. Plenty of time left before that little piece of "fun", but I'm already anxious/fearful/excited. Is that wrong?

Cristiano Ronaldo! 9! Cristiano Ronaldo!

HE'S HERE!!!!!

Last night, at 21:00 local time, Cristiano Ronaldo was introduced as a Real Madrid player, in front of 80,000 fans in the Santiago Bernabeu, and 10,000 outside of the stadium. AAHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

Cristiano, or Ronaldo, depends on who you ask, chose the number 9, as his first two choices for the number, 7 and 17, were already taken by Raul and van Nistelrooy.

All I can say - YAY!!!!! WOOHOO!!!!!!!!

Eusebio, one of the greatest Portugese players (he's from Angola or something, but player for Portugal), was in attendance, and was full of praise for the young footballer.

American Idol S06E14 - Top 20: Top 10 Guys

10 guys, and all that other bullshit. And yes, this stil IS American Idol. Jennifer Hudson won an Oscar. The show's taking credit. Did you expect anything else?

1) Phil - "Missing You" by John Waite. He dedicates the song to the Navy. NOT his daughters, the Navy. He's in the Navy, as a SINGER. Gosh... HAND GESTURES!! ARGH!!!! FUCK YOU!!! Sorry about that. It was a'ight. His voice sounded wierd. It was a'ight. And he sings about NOT missing the Navy? LOL! The last part of it, minus the ending, was quite good. But overall, just OK. Randy thought it was hot. HUH??? Paula's delusional. Simon's not jumoing out of his chair. He quite liked the bit towards the end, but he's not hearing anything unique.

COCA COLA! Sundance hears people telling him not to be crappy. AJ's got Mixed Emotions. Rolling Stones reference. LOVE IT! Jared will do Marvin Gaye.

2) Jared - "Let's Get It On" by Marvin Gaye. GROSS. He dedicates it to his parents. After I finished puking and got to actually watch the performance, I was pleasantly surprised. The performance part of it could have been better, but the singing was very good! I quite liked it! The hand acros the face at the end SUCKED! Randy heard pitchiness, but loved the face move. Paula's steaming. Simon says she's funny. Once. Then Paula starts going into a later timeslot sort of show. Simon was reminded of the Love Boat. Jared says it would have been a great love boat. LOL! It's all falling apart! LOL!

3) AJ - "Feeling Good" by Nina Simone. He too dedicates the song to his parents. The violins filled start was yucky. Other than that, it was pretty good. The problem is, I don't know if it was the song I was diggin', 'cause I really like this song, or the vocals. I think it's the song... Randy loves the improvement. Paula's 5 yr old. Simon says it was nearly very good. LOL. "Chuning problems".

4) Sanjaya - "Steppin' Out With My Baby" by Tony Bennett. He dedicates the song to his grandpa. He died. Awww... That alone will win him a couple thousands of votes. His performance shouldn't earn him any. The look was horrible, the "moves" were terrible, the singing was sub-par, like WAY sub-par, and again, he's too quiet! The ending SUCKED. Randy called it bad high school talent show. Paula's wierd. She doesn't like Simon. LOL! Simon called it a ghastly post-lunched, dressed-up-by-parents-and-asked-to-sing, and not good.

5) Chris S. - "Trouble" by Ray LaMontagne. He dedicates it to his HOT!!! wife. I really like him. And his singing. The fact that he's just so darn chubby just adds to it. VERY good performance. The first one tonight, other than the hand that was Jared, to bring both a performance that's good, and a good vocal. Randy likes that he's good. Paula's inconsistent. Simon thought he proved he's a good singer. He was worried about singing "Trouble" to his wife, but thinks the words worked it out.

6) Nick - "Fever" by Peggy Lee. He dedicates it to his girlfriend. Is he seriously going to sing "Fever"? a dude? SERIOUSLY? The whole performance seemed awkward. He might heave sung it OK, but he's a DUDE! Singing "Fever"! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! Randy likes that he's better than last week. It was very pitchy, and he was rushing in bits, but it was kinda nice. Paula's redundant. Simon thought it was good, but he lacked charisma. Sorry, I mean "charismar".

COCA COLA! Blake thinks he needs to step it up.

7) Blake - "Virtual Insanity" by Jamiroquai. He dedicates it to his parents. Finally, FINALLY, a Jamiroquai songon Idol. FINALLY. I REALLY liked it! And the beatboxing's back! VERY good! Again, it's a welcome change up from all those old song. VERY GOOD! Randy likes him. He talks a lot about all the things I said. Paula's a fan. Simon thought the first part was a copycat, the second was great, and in the last the "chuning" went.

8) Brandon - "Time after Time" by Cyndi Lauper. He dedicates it to his grandma. It was really boring. And not exceptionally good. Not really good, either. Not good, at all. That was a backup singer's performance. He thinks it didn't fo enough for him vocally. And it was boring. Brandon makes excuses. Paula's full of "wisdom". Simon loves grandmas. He thinks he hasn't shown he's a good singer.

Simon's mum's b-day's in november, he loves puppies, and randy loves dawgs. Don't ask.

9) Chris R. - "Geek in the Pink" by Jason Mraz. He dedicates it to his grandma. O. M. G. I mean, it wasn't perfect, not that close really, and he did lose steam for a bit. BUT I LOVED IT! The song choice, the performance, everything, for me, was awesome. Randy thought it was better than the original. Paula's crazy. Simon says it was the best tonight, by a mile. LOVE IT!

10) Sundance - "Mustang Sally" by Wilson Pickett. He dedicated it to his son, Levi. Meet Levi, the son of Sundance. HA! The song choice was great, the song is immensly fun, BUT, it doesn't show off your vocals. Not really. But it's a crowd pleaser. And that's exactly what it was. Fun, as heck, but not great. Randy thought he dropped the bomb, and that it was hot. Not. Paula's deaf. Simon thinks he can do better. LOL at baby Levi with Sundance beard! LOL!

The "droid" thing was funny-ish.

1. Chris R.
2. Blake
3. Chris S.
4. Jared
5. Sundance
6. AJ
7. Phil
8. Nick
9. Brandon
10. Sanjaya

American Idol S06E13 - Top 24 Results

Because THIS, is AMMMMMMMMMerican Idol! Oh, and 24... 20... Whatever...

The judges think a girl will win. Probably. WE learn about some of the mentors this season - Diana Ross, Jon Bon Jovi (YAY!), J Lo, Gwen Stefani, Tony Bennett, Martina McBride, Lulu andPeter Noone, Barry Gibb. Impressive. Then, it's the obligatory recap, of the guys and girls' performances.

GROUP SONG: ALREADY!?!?!? YAY!!!! "Sowing the Seeds of Love" by Tears for Fears. Well, it's hard to say anything about it with SO MANY people performing...

On to the results, and the guys are first. Nick's petrified, Chris S. loves Simon. Simon says he likes him. The back row joins Ryan on stage. Brandon's safe. Sundance's safe. Chris R.'s safe. Nick's safe. He's shocked. Blake's safe. Paul's all alone on the stage. He's outta here! He sings. Yes, he still is barefoot.

The girls are next. LaKisha's nervous. The back row join Ryan on stage. Jordin's safe. Stephanie's safe. Sabrina's safe. Leslie's safe. Melinda's safe. Antonella's the only one left on stage. She looks petrified. She's safe. She's shocked. Ryan's mean. He calls Amy on stage. And she's outta here! She sings. Sanjaya cries.

That American Idol Challenge SUCKS! And the question's easy. It's B, BTW.

Fantasia's in da house! She looks like crap. "Big News" for her, as she's about to star in The Color Purple. Quincy Jones' in the audience, and tries to talk about the play, but is cut. LOL! She sings "I'm Here". She sang with "SH" instead of S. "But they shtill mine". LOL. But, she's still one of the better contestants on Idol. Ever.

Again with the girls. The ones that have yet to meet Ryan on stage do so. Haley's safe. LaKisha's safe. Gina's safe. Nicole and Alaina are left. Alaina's safe. Nicole's outta here! She's had a lot of fun. She sings.

On to the guys. Again, the ones that weren't on estage are now on stage. Chris S.' safe. Phil's safe. Jared's safe. AJ's safe. Sanjaya and Rudy are left. One of 'em's in the top 4 guys, the other's out. Sanjaya's safe. Rudy's outta here!

We see the journeys of the ones that are outta here. They're not having a "Bad Day", but rather are going "Home" by Daughtry. Then Rudy sings us out.

Watchmen

I saw the movie Watchmen the other day.

Again, a pretty wierd movie. It probably is down to my down right non-existent previous knowledge of the Minutemen and Watchmen and all of those things, though.

I liked the movie. Quite a lot. And i would like to say that Malin Akerman, and Carla Gugino (as the young Silk Spectre) are HOT! And the "porn" scene? HOT!

Also, kudos to the producers/editor/whomever for the awesome soundtrack - "The Times They Are A-Changin'", "99 Luftballons", Jimi Hendrix's version of "All Along the Watchtower", "Hallelujah", "The Sounds of Silence", a cover by My Chemical Romance of Dylan's "Desolation Row" and "First We Take Manhattan". NICE!

On a side note, Malin making out/sleeping with a glowing blue man was way gross.

American Idol S06E12 - Top 24: Top 12 Girls

After the sucking that was the guys (serously, how bad did THEY suck?), I'm really crossing my fingers and hoping for a better showing from the girls.

We get a recap of last night's guys' performances. Then, after some banter, we see a recap of the girls' journeys to the Top 24.

1) Stephanie - "How Come U Don't Call Me Anymore?" by Prince. Her parents believe in her. And for good reason. She's good. Very good. And the performance was good. Very good. The last note was all over the lace. But it was really good. Randy thought it set it off. He thought it was pitchy, though. But he liked it. Paula's drunk. Simon thought she was a million times better than any of the guys. That should be enough to save her from the claws of the Death Spot. Trademark pending.

COCA COLA! Melinda thought the guys were awesome. Some other girls talked too.

2) Amy - "I Can't Make You Love Me" by Bonnie Raitt. This song needs to be put down. Like yesterday. I mean, how many times can you listen do THE SAME DAMN SONG??? And when they do medicore shitty versions, like this one, I seriously couldn't care less. Carrie's first audition, the VERY FIRST one, was MUCH better. Randy said it was kinda boring. Paula's comatose. Simon can't remember her. And she's got no personality when she sings.

3) Leslie - "(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman" by Aretha Franklin. I'm tired. And bored. And I couldn't care less if I tried. Kelly's version was about a gazillion times better. The performance part SUCKED! The singing was meh-inducing. Except for the last run. That SUCKED! Randy's struggling. He thought the song was too big for her. Paula's crazy. Simon says something long and complicated, that Ryan later explains meant he thought she was out of her comfort zone. And it's the return of the Dawgpound. I could be more excited. Really, I could.

4) Sabrina - "I Never Loved a Man (The Way I Love You)" by Aretha Franklin. She looks really bad. She reminds me of a classmate i used to have. She was BUTT UGLY, and fugly as hell. Sabrina can sing, though. And she does a VERY good job. There were some parts of it I hated. But that's not to say they weren't good. Randy called her the one to beat. Paula's high as a kite. Simon thought it was the best so far.

5) Antonella - "I Don't Want to Miss a Thing" by Aerosmith. She's HOT! And gorgeous! Too bad she can't really sing. That really sucked. The arrangement was terrible. The phrasing was just plain wierd. And her "alterations" to the original lyrics were awful. At least she's hot! Randy thought it was really pitchy and bland. Paula's "supportive". Simon thought it didn't work. And he thinks the song is way too big for her. Is there ANYONE in the WHOLE singing world that THAT song's too big for???

COCA COLA! Jordin thinks her young age is an advantage. And a disadvantage.

6) Jordin - "Give Me One Reason" by Tracy Chapman. I kinda get what Simon was saying about the TOO sweet thing. The faces she made were exactly that. That being said, though, the performance was really good. The ending was great. Randy wants her to challenge herself. Paula's disturbing. Simon also wants her to push herself, and he thought it was good. LOL at Ryan "enlarging" himself.

7) Nicole - "Stay" by Chaka Khan. There was something not quite right with her performance. I can't quite put my finger on it. I guess it was good. I dunno. I'm puzzled. Randy thought it wasn't really working for him. It went right over his head. Paula's autistic. Simon thought it was indulgent and aggressive.

8) Haley - "It's All Coming Back to Me Now" by Celine Dion. WHY WOULD SHE SING CELINE??? Well, that was a waste of time. It really was nothing. I mean, it's like those filler tracks on albums. WHY??? Randy eventually says it was just OK for him. Paula's an imbecile. Simon thought she sounded 40. He also thought it was boring.

9) Melinda - "(Sweet Sweet Baby) Since You've Been Gone" by Aretha Franklin. WOW. This girl's good. More than good. Great. More than great. Awesome. I mean, that was terrific! And she's completely unpretentious. Randy says she blew it out the box. She's shocked. Paula's repetitive. Simon says she's fantastic.

COCA COLA! Alaina says she's perfect. Well, not really, but that's basically what she said.

10) Alaina - "Brass in Pocket" by the Pretenders. Wow, that sucked. To begin, the volume on her mic was too loud, the song sucked, and the performance was just terrible. Andcoming after the Doolittle, it just shows how crappy she is. Randy thought it was really, buh, I don't know. Seriously. Paula's numb. Simon said it wasn't special, and it was a mess. Simon claims Ryan wants to date her. I seriously don't know what to do with that.

11) Gina - "All By Myself" by Eric Carmen. Sounded shouty at some parts. But other than the volume, it was pretty good. Randy thought it was kinda nice. Paula's complmentary. Simon doesn't think she hit the big note. I kinda agree with Simon, but I think it's still better than what he gave her credit for.

12) LaKisha - "And I'm Telling You I'm Not Going" by Jennifer Holliday. GUTSY song choice, to say the least. TA-TAS! The arrangement was kinda strange, but the singing! DAMN! Brilliant. She even sort of performed it! The ending was FANTASTIC! Randy bows. He says she laid it out, among many YEAH's. Paula's proud. Simon says he's tempted to tell the rest of the Top 24 to just go home. It was great, but not quite THAT great.

1. LaKisha
2. Melinda
3. Jordin
4. Sabrina
5. Stephanie
6. Gina
7. Nicole
8. Haley
9. Amy
10. Leslie
11. Alaina
12. Antonella

American Idol S06E10 - Top 24: Top 12 Guys

Finally, we get to the Top 24, and it's the guys' turn tonight!

We start with Ryan assuring us, for the 6th season in a row, that this is the most talented field ever. Then he blows his and the show's own trumpet. Not literally, though. That would have been disgusting. Then it's a recap of the guys' journeys to the top 24. The Rolling Stones ROCK. In just so mane ways, it's incredible.

1) Rudy - "Free Ride" by Edgar Winter Group. He's a self-proclaimed professional musician. And Simon doesn't like him. He's got some diction problems when singing. Either that, or no one told to to OVERenunciate when singing. The song is fun and all, but it's mainly down to the song choice, and not the singing. Randy thought it was really corny. "Any bar in America" I believe he said. Paula's an idiot. Simon thought he's not unique.

COCA COLA! Chris Sligh thinks all the guys look pretty. He's funny! LOL! Chris Richardson thinks they're all awesome. Brandon worked with Xtina, Timberlake, Usher et al.

2) Brandon - "Rock With You" by Michael Jackson. He's happy. I think. The "intimate" start was shiver-inducing. After we get over the initial discomfort, he does a very nice job. And the best news? 2 guys in, and still no ballads! Maybe this is the year they finally learn? Randy called it pitchy. Paula's useless. Simon called it safe and predictable. He thinks he's better than that.

3) Sundance - "Nights in White Satin" by the Moody Blues. It's being all down hill after his first audition, getting worse and worse with each passing performance. First ballad of the night. Well, you didn't really think THAT was going to last, right? God he sucks. Why did they put him through over that Tommy dude? The song SUCKED too. Just terrible. Randy thought he was pitchy all the way through. Paula's right. Did I actually write that just there? Simon called him very "dad in a wedding"-y. And flat. His tummy's very not flat, though.

Paula just rubbed her tits. It was oddly not attractive. Hmmm...

4) Paul - "Careless Whisper" by Wham!. He's always barefoot. I'm just groosed out. His smoke-y husky voice sounds REALLY forced. And, I could Care-less. HA! It really was very bad. The falsetto was just awful! Randy's back to saying the contestant's name three times. He thought it was very pitchy. He did like him calling him Mr. Jackson. Paula's hypocritical. Simon called it third rate. Ryan shows up shoe-less too. Ha! Solidarity, huh?

5) Chris R. - "I Don't Want to Be" by Gavin DeGraw. Both Bo and Elliott performed this song. But they did different arrangements. I really liked this performance. The stage presence and the movments were awkwrd, but in a good way, somehow. Randy thought he made it kinda work. He did mistake Gavin for Edwin McCain, though. So I don't know what to make of his comment. Paula's rude. Simon's negative. He thought the vocal was bad, and below standard.

6) Nick - "Now and Forever" by Richard Marx. The third ballad of the night's not as bad as the first two balladeers, but it's not great either. It's just there. Not great, not really bad. Randy thought it was really boring and very pitchy. And not good. Paula's drunk. Simon didn't thin kit was that bad. He says some other things. And he says he'll be there next week too.

7) Blake - "Somewhere Only We Know" by Keane. He holds the mic in an odd way. That's about the only bad thing about it. The song was great, the singing was VERY VERY good, it was just great. He ever refrained from beatboxing! And, for a ballad, it was anything BUT boring. Randy was shocked at the song selection, but he kinda dug it. Paula's maternal. Simon thinks he's contemporary. And he thinks it's the best tonight.

8) Sanjaya - "Knocks Me Off My Feet" by Stevie Wonder. They keep pushing the sob story that is his hot sis not making it through. "I don't want to bore you". HA! Talk about comedy! He was barely audible for most of the song, too. And, yeah, it was boring. Just blah. Randy didn't think it was very good. Paula's pedophile-y. Simon thought it was the most dreary performance yet.

9) Chris S. - "Typical" by Mute Math. In the Birmingham auditions, he and the rest of the hopefuls had to sing Sweet Home Alabama about 37 times, and he didn't like thesong to begin with, so if he hears it again he'll probably go postal. HA! He's so chubby! In a good way! He's really pretty good. Never heard that song before, but pretty good. Randy thought it's all good, and he's a Chris fan. He loved it, and thought it was the bomb. Paula's stupid. Simon's torn, because the singing felt student-gig-y. And he calls Ryan sweetheart. LOL. And Chris ris Simon a new one, saying just because he doesn't sing Il Divo or the Teletubbies, doesn't mean he can't sing. ROFLMAO! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Simon's pissed.

COCA COLA! Jared's a New Yorka, so he can handle the heat.

10) Jared - "Back at One" by Brian McKnight. We've never seen Jared before The Chair. But his "Cupid" was VERY good. He's got annoying and distracting hand gestures. I dunno. I guess it was a'ight. Randy thought it was pretty good, and ayight. Paula's moronic. Simon called it unadventurous And nasally.

11) AJ - "Never Too Much" by Luther Vandross. He's DESPERATE. Was the Idol experience, for him, orgasmic? moronic? boring? tree? HUH??? Keep on keepin' on? How lame s that quote? Well, at least he didn't sing a ballad. Paula was dancing. Simon was preplexed. It was aight. Randy thought it was vocally good, he can definitely blow, but didn't bring anything new to it. Paula's observant. Simon thought it was good. Not great, not terrible. And kind of a theme park performance. And predictable.

12) Phil - "I Could Not Ask For More" by Edwin McCain. Phil's a Sailor/Navy dude! And a bad dad. Clay did it. Clay was better. Phil wasn't bad. But he wasn't Clay. He was just good. Not great. Not Clay. Clay was great. Phil wasn't. Randy thought it was the best vocal of the night. HUH??? Paula's grooving. Not really. Simon thought it was OK.

1. Blake
2. Chris S.
3. Chris R.
4. Brandon
5. Phil
6. Jared
7. AJ
8. Nick
9. Rudy
10. Sanjaya
11. Paul
12. Sundance

Knowing - HUH???

So, I saw that Knowing movie the other day, and all I can say is - HUH???

I mean, WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT???? I thought movies were supposed to make sense. Was I wrong?

It begins with a pretty nice storyline, but then just goes from bad to worse. And don't even get me started about the whole he's-not-talking-to-his-father thing. Or that terrible it's-just-like-they're-in-the-garden-of-eden anding bullshit. I mean, COME ON!

Just terrible. Seriously, terrible. And beware the whisper people!

And on an annoyed side note - what's with the sado-maso? I mean, the director/producer/editor/whatever must have had a HYOOGE pain fetish. Otherwise, how can you explan the numerous shots of people burning, people exploding, animals burning (ANIMALS!!!), and people being crushed to death by a subway train? HUH???

American Idol S06E10 - The Chair

You know the drill - The Elevator, The Walk, The Chair, The Decision.

Sanjaya's first. His last song was good. He's through. And doesn't quite know what to do. Anna's tall. And loud. She's not through. She's shocked. Bernard (who?) is not through. Eric (who?) and Tami are out too. Melinda ALWAYS looks terrified. Her last song was great. And she's through. She's shocked. Brandon's the other backup singer. His last song was good, as well. And he's through.

Gina's the one that was cut in Hollywood week last season. Her last song was good. She's not cut this time. She's through. She's shocked. Jimmy and Errick (WHO???) are out. Haley's next. Her first song in Hollywood wasn't great. She's through. Phil's the bad dad. His last song was good. The clothes SUCKED. But the singing was good. He's through.

The Simpsons Movie (that is AWESOME) is shamelessly plugged, as the top 40 (?) are getting a sneak preview of it. I think. Chris' FUNNY! LOL! "You guys are probably wondering why I called this meeting today...". LOL! His last song was very good. He's through. Blake's the beatboxer. We see that great group performance again. Or part of it. He's through. Thomas' also in that group, but he's out. Rudy (who?) is the last member of that group. His first song in Hollywood wasn't that good. He's through.

People are nervous. Paul's cool, calm and collected. He says he'll always be barefoot. That's already old. He's got filthy underwear too. Gross. His last song wasn't really good. Jordin's last song was good. And she's through. Olivia (who?), Tatiana and Monique are out. AJ (who?) is desperate. His last song wasn't bad. He's through. Stephanie (who?) had a good last song. She's through. Leslie (who?) also had a good-ish last song. And she too is through. Nick quit last year in Hollywood. His last song was good. He's through. And is overwhelmed.

Alaina cries ALL THE TIME. She's nervous. Her last song was good-ish. She effed the lyrics. She's through. Chris' first song was good. He's through. Sabrina (who???) had a good last song. She's through. Jerome (who?) is out. Joelle (who?) is out. Matt the cowboy's out. Princess (who?) is out. LaKisha's selling her sob story, that she's got a girl. Her last song was great. Even if she loked like a grandma. She's through.

Nicole (who?) is next. Her last song was good. She's through. Jared (WHO???) had a very good last song. He's through. Amy (WHO????) is next. Her last song was good too. She's through. Down to the last 2 guys and 2 girls. Antonella and Marisa are the last girls. Marisa's first song in Hollywierd was good. Antonella's last song wsa a mess of forgotten words. Antonella's through. Marisa's out. She's about to throw up. Marisa's crying. She curses. Sundance and Tommy have "fun" in the elevator. Sundance is red. He's through. Tommy's out. He gets pissed in the elevator.

The Top 12 Girls: Antonella Barba, Haley Scarnato, LaKisha Jones, Jordin Sparks, Stephanie Edwards, Melinda Doolittle, Alaina Alexander, Gina Glocksen, Amy Krebs, Leslie Hunt, Sabrina Sloan and Nicole Tranquilo.

The Top 12 Guys: Phil Stacy, Jared Cotter, Chris Richardson, Nick Pedro, Brandon Rogers, Sundance Head, Rudy Cardenas, AJ Tabaldo, Paul Kim, Chris Sligh, Blake Lewis, Sanjaya Malakar.

Raul Albiol! 18! Raul Albiol!

Well, after Kaka's HYOOOGE presentation, comes Raul Albiol's.

Sure, it wasn't the 50+ thousands that cam to see Kaka, but still, 8,000 or so is not a bad number, considering most stadium in Israel can't even hold that much.

The Spanish central defender chose the number 18, that used to belong to Ruben de la Red (and Faubert, but I really don't want to talk about him). Ruben's a good friend of Raul Albiol, who promised to keep that number safe until Ruben's expected return to the football field.

For those of you who don't know, Ruben, who was a huge promise, and one of the best potentials ever to come out of Real's youth system, passed out, 11 minutes into a cup game against Real Union last season. He has been out of action since, and has done more than enough medical exams and tests, to try and figure the cause of what happened to him. Unfortunately, no cause was found, yet, and Ruben will not be able to play football this up coming season. We all cross our fingers and hope and pray that he will be healthy, first and foremost, and if possible that he will return to play for Real, as soon as possible.

Back to the good news, and the next player to be presented should be Cristiano Ronaldo, if I remember correctly, and that will happen in 3 days' time.

American Idol S06E09 - Hollywood Week

In just one hour, we get all the tension/drama/excitment that is Hell Week (trademark pending). Seriously???

Day 1, and only the girls are performing, and there are 2 twice as many as the boys. Ryan explains how this day, and the next, will work. Jory, who's canadian's first. I'm unipressed. Next's Geri, Kelly, Lisa, Christen and Jeromishia. I kid you not, her name really is Jeromishia. None are more than ok. And they are all outta here! Shocker!

Perla's annoying. Like Gedeon last season. I hated him. I hate her. She does the same song she did in her audition. That sucks. Rachel's the one that talked to her hubby's picture. and she's alright. Rachel's outta here. Perla moves on. Simon rips at Perla. Rachel's depressed. Perla's depressed, too. Baylie's HOT! She's good. But what's up with the mediocrity overall? Ashlyn's out. Porcelana's out. Sarah's out. So are some others. Nicole's having problems with choosing a song. And she sucks. And she's out. And she blames the song. And the judges assure her mom it wasn't the song. HA! Simon's over this. They keep telling her it's not the song. And she keeps saying "the delivery of the song" bla bla bla. SHUT UP! Melinda, Jordin, Gina, Tatiana, Jamie Lin and others are through.

Day 2, and it's the guys' turn to face the judges. Brian's 19. Did you know he was 19? He is 19, just so you know. BTW, he's 19. What's with them recycling songs? Do something new, darn it! He's good. Jarrod's the Navy guy. He's a'ight. Matt's the one whose parents didn't support him. He's disticntly average. The Jarrod's out, Matt and Chris Sligh're through. 34 guys are through in total, amongst them are Blake the beatboxer, Nick that quit, bad dad Phil, and Jesus. I mean Castro. I mean Sean.

Group performances! YAY! Some drama ensues. I couldn't care less. Even if I tried, really, really hard. I will say however that Baylie and Antonella "not going to sleep", TOGETHER, is REALLY HOT! And that Amanda's a BEOTCH!

Simon warns everyone not to forget the words. HA! Some people forget the words. Well, DUH! Some more drama. Gina and Perla's group sing. Marisa is somewhat hot. Perla sucks. and she's out. The Chris/Rudy/Tom/Blake group performance was one of the better ones. EVER. And they are all through. L'Paige mumbles. Robyn's average. Sundace's just alright. He's loud. And red. And through. Antonella's alright. Baylie barely sings anything. Amanda forgets the words. But she's a bitch. Baylie's out. BUT SHE'S HOT! And Amanda thinks she's good. RIGHT. 36 people in all are going home, including Jesus/Osama/Fidel!

In room 1, Chris, Gina, Blake, Matt, Melinda, Paul and Haley and others. They're through. In room 2, Tami, LaKisha, Sundance and others, and they're through. Jordin's there. Room 3, with the Indian sister and Jamie Lin, is out. Sanjaya's REALLY sad. Next is The Chair (trademark pending, too).

American Idol S06E08 - The Best of the Rest Auditions

Some more people that will suck. Some more people that will rock. What's not to like?

Lessons! Woohoo! Lesson 1 - The Look. Some people look like CRAP! Christa's crazy. And she wears all kinds of fabrics, on all kind of places. Wierd. LOL! "Today you felt like the inside of a dustbin?". LOL! She, obviously, SUCKS. And she begs a little. And cries. And begs. But she's still not through. Tami's a paddy cab driver. WOW. She's SO lesbian. And she sing "Whipping Post". HA! She changes the lyrics, so as to not appear totaly lesbian. That version SUCKED, but she can sing. And she's through.

Lesson 2 - Seek Inspiration. Some people are inspired by former Idols. Others by some other singers. Paul Kim was inspired by the Hung. He wants to prove Asians really can sing. LOL! Awesome! He's a pool-boy. He can sing. The husky voice is distracting. And he's through. Jack's inspiration's Bo's "In a Dream". He SUCKS. And he sings about opening his eyes. With his eyes closed. Simon called him deluded. LOL. Lesson 3 - Don't Give Up. Somepeople audition after being rejected before. We saw one of the cowboys from last season. Gina was the dental assistant from last season who's in love with Simon. She's still good. Simon says she's got a good taste. She wants to hug him. And again, she's through. And she does hug him. LOL!

Some people love Simon. Some people hate Randy. A LOT of people love Paula. Edward's a crazy Paula fan. He's there to see her. He gets to hug her. Awww... He sucks, though. As long as he's happy. Some people work in different jobs. And we see what some of last year's finalists did before going on Idol. Lesson 4 - Audition On Your Own. 3 rollerskating waitresses, a la Kellie Pickler, are auditioning together. Heather's first. She's alright. Ashley's next. She's got a ton of make up on. She's alright. Ebony's next. And she's better. Marginally. Heather's not through. Paula tells Ashley she shouldn't wear that much make up. She disses her for being old. HA! She's through. Ebony's through too.

We are reminded of the sucky singles of the Idol winners. We get to hear some orginals in some auditions. Faithon SUCKS. Melissa SUCKS. Brandon's beatboxing's good. But it SUCKED. Wes' spooky. He SUCKS. And the hand gestures. Ugh. And the stomping. Ugh. Simon's confused. Lesson 5 - Shake Your Moneymaker? People dance. Poorly. Except for Matt Buckstein (he was on last season). He doesn't dance. And we see Alex. Whose dancing SUCKS. And he SUCKS. Weren't we promised some good auditions??? Simon's less than impressed. He's outta here! And he gets to hug Paula. And he shakes Randy's hand. Simon couldn't care less.

Lesson 6 - Clarity. And we get to guess what they are singing! Yay! I wouldn't have guessed the first. Or the second. Or the third. LaKisha's got a tiny baby girl. Whose 3 yr old. And she's awesome! And she's through. And she cries hugging her daughter. Awww...

I refuse to comment on the waste of time that was the recap of the auditions. WE JUST SAW THAT!!! But, next, it's Hell Week! Hollywood, here we come! 172 people will be there, only to be brutally cut down to just 24! Ha! This is going to be awesome! Was that Marlea? The first one ever to quit? Back in season 4? Huh???

American Idol S06E07 - San Antonio Auditions

Remember the Alamo? It was a long time ago. I'm not sure we would like to remember THIS Alamo...

SAN ANTONIO -

People came from all over the country. Simon's jet lagged. This first contestant's all about the HARD rock. Billy Idol? Seriously? Bryan SUCKS. And he banged his knees on the floor. OUCH. And he screams. He doesn't feel pain, apparently. Haley's a wedding band-er. Or formerly. Something. She shopped in a hoochie mama's shop. Or something. She sings the often sung "I Can't Make You Love Me" (Carrie's audition, Constance, plenty of others). She's good. She's through.

Jasmine's ready. I guess. The judges laugh. For no reason. Then she starts singing. Now they've got a reason to laugh. She sucks. And Randy and Simon do laugh. Jasmine looks pissed. And she ripps on Randy for not doing anything. LOL. Her mom says Simon needs to go back to "French". Or "British". LOL. Baylie's HOT! REALLY HOT! She's scared their horses will eat her. LOL. She's all about the fashion. She's NOT a country girl. She's good. And HOT! Simon calls her commercial with a capital C. SPOT ON. She's through. And the judges liked her name. LOL.

We are introduced to the doors to the auditions room. And a "horror/action/western/whatever" film, about people trying to open the right door. LOL! "AH, Push it!". LOL. Akron and William are cousins. LOL. Bruce and the Hulk. LOL. Violins. LOL. Hulk's first. He sucks. But he knows that. And he stages a fight with the judges, for the cameras. LOL! Bruce's next. And Akron's good. It's where LeBron's from! LOL... He's good. The second song was much better. And he's through.

LaRisa SUCKS. Deborah sucks. Sandie puts one finger in her right ear. I plugged both. She SUCKS! And she cries after Simon thought if it was serious. Awww. Ashlyn was beaten up in high school because she has a good voice. HUH??? Simon looks preplexed. She can sorta sing. Randy looks puzzled. They are put off by her facial expressions. They pass. Simon says he would have said yes. She cries. Simon thinks they made a mistake. So, of course, they bring her back in.

After the break, Ashlyn's back in the audition room. She still makes those faces. The other two, aka Paula and Randy change their minds, and she's through! I'm sure Simon did absolutely NOTHING to make/force them to do that. Jacob, nicknamed Jake the Snake, is next. He can't dance. He's influenced by Axl Rose and Kurt Cobain. Right. He sucks. And he goes berserk after he goes out. Well, not really, but you know. But he likes Ryan.

Jimmy sings the great song "Cupid". And, despite some wierd hand gestures, he's really good. Simon calls him a little fun Ruben. HUH??? He's through. Simon kept calling him Jimbo. LOL. And his little girl (?) doesn't know what to make of it. 22 total are through from Texas. Next, it's the rest of the rest show! Woohoo...

American Idol S06E06 - Los Angeles Auditions

LA! Woohoo! If people go through from LA, are they "going to" Hollywood, or are they "staying in" Hollywood? Huh? HUH??? HUH!?!!?!?!?

LOS ANGELES -

Kat! "Over the Rainbow"! Woohoo! Olivia Newton-John's going to guest judge in tonight's episode. Martik's crazy. Like, seriously, he lost his mind. He needs help. He, aside from being a tiger, believes he's the most entertaining person on the planet earth. He REALLY is crazy. And he took his shirt off. Of course. LOL at the cartoon noises. And he's got a "mic". WOW. He SUCKS, beyond any level humanly comprehensible. Hollywierd is right. Sholandric's name SUCKS. He wants to bring the romance andlove back into the music. RIGHT. He too is delusional. And he SUCKS, bit hairy kitty kat balls.

Angela sucks. Grace sucks. LOL at her outfit. Sophat SUCKS. His name does too. Marianna's desperate. She was wailing out of her mom's womb. And she sucks. Really, really bad. And she begs. Still begging. Still begging. Yep, still begging. That's right, she's still begging. And she keeps saying she's on her knees. WOW. She SUCKS. And she pushes her mom into the room. She still begs. Her mom begs too. WOW. Desperate, with a humongous capital D. WOW. Simon and Randy thought her mom was hot. Some people beg. Alaina's "life story" is one of a moron. But she's good a good voice, and can sing. "Feeling Good"'s NOT by the Buble, though.

Again, we are reminded Taylor won. And Phuong's his soul sistah. but it is SO fake. And she's excited about Taylor's PICTURE. WOW. And she SUCKS. And she can't dance. She REALLY SUCKS. She's REALLY obsessed with Taylor. And she was "nervous". She sucks. Brandon's a backup singer. He knows and sang backup for some big BIG names. So he's GOT to be good, right? RIGHT! He's very, VERY good. Simon says he and Brandon share the likeability factor. LOL. And he's through.

Brian already got to Hollywood, where he was shot down. He's here to bring it. And he's loud. But he's good. And through. Even though Simon couldn't remember him. Sherman's 64. His wife passed away. He does this for her. Awww... And they are going to let him sing. He's not bad. Paula's crying. He's never going through, but it was very nice of him. And he hugs/shakes everyone's hand. And he feels like a winner. Awww... 21 are through on day 1.

Darold and Cavett are dating, and are both auditioning. They met at THE bus stop. Cavett's STUPID. She likes to go by the name "Sparkles". And she SUCKS. And she completely flirts with Simon. Her boyfriend SUCKS. "please go away" is right. LOL! "Depends what kind of music we're listening to". LOL... MAKE THEM STOP KISSING! PLEASE!

Anthony SUCKS. But he's a good sport. Eric's been training for 2 years. If you really have to do that, you're probably not good enough. And he talks in wierd "sientific" terms. He SUCKS. LOL! He learned from the Paula and Randy DVD! LOL! Simon tries to get him back, Randy and Paula try to prevent it. LOL! In day 2, 19 went through, for a total of, A LOT. Relatively. Next, San Antoin!

American Idol S06E05 - Birmingham Auditions

Birmingham, AL! Home of the Ruuuuuuuuben, Bo and Taylor.

BIRMINGHAM -

Erica's first, and her southern accent is NOT cute, unlike Kellie's, or any other Idol finalist, EVER. She says Unchained Melody's by LeAnn Rimes. Stupid, stupid, stupid. She's not really good. It was actually painful. They tell her not to sing another one. She does. They scream. She keeps singing. Paula's astonished. She SUCKS. And not through. Some people cry for not making i tthrough. Katie's got a baby voice. It is REALLY annoying. I SERIOUSLY hope she sucks. Damn. She doesn't. But her singing voice is REALLY strange too. But she's good. Simon looks pissed, and REALLY hopes she doesn't get through. And she's through.

Tatiana's 17. She's good. And through. Siana's scary. And fat. And i don't now where her chest ends and her stomach starts. And she sucks.

Bernarnd's ok. Not special. He's through. Margaret's NOT 26. More like 50. And she's crazy. And she's Big Bird-like. I'm scared. LOL! When she tells the judges she's "26", Simon says he's 9, Paula's 11 and Randy's 10. Ha! And she SUCKS. LOL at Randy and Paula "digging" it. Simon looks puzzled. She's NOT 33. She IS 50.

Some people go through. Jamie Lee's HOT! She's got a "sad story". Her dad's paralyzed. Why is that, you ask? HE SHOT HIMSELF! AND, HE SHOT HIS EX! FOR CHEATING ON HIM! HE CAUGHT HER IN THE ACT! AAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! She's not great. But she's alright. And she's through. Chris Sligh's a funny dude! LOL! Xtina! HA! His interview bit was FUNNY! LOL! And he wants to make the Hasselhoff cry. LOL! ROFL! LMAO! And he's great! LOL! 16 from day 1 are through.

Paula's not with us today. Yay! Victoria's hair is 6 FEET LONG! WOW! Spooky... She's a "nice" person. They want to meet her mom, with the SLIGHTly shorter hair. Victoria doesn't suck, but she's not good, either. And she's not through. Lakia's name SUCKS. And she can't talk properly. And she SUCKS. It hurts. We see people being nice, despite their dreams being shattered. That's nice of them.

Some familys support some people. Team Nichole? Huh? Seriously? And Nichole cries. Almost. She's ok. Pretty good. Simon looks bored. The judges don't think she's ready. And she's outta here! Simon and Randy are "exhausted". And then came Brandy. She's crazy. Delusional. Stuid. Moronic. Idiotic. And she doesn't wear a bra. WHY OH WHY??? She SUCKS, big, hairy virgin balls. She thinks the floor's to blame. Maybe the carpet's to blame too. And she gets pissed. And she talks back. She needs to take some grammar lessons. She SERIOUSLY thinks she rocks. And she curses. That was amusing, her whole ranting as Simon and Randy go out, and then back in. "Sweet Home Alabama"! THAT SONG ROCKS! Next, LA! Hollywood!